Huh. Well, there you go.

[wily_one24]

Alright people, buckle up

Comments

[a_h_c]

Jacqui, I think this is huge for you and I appreciate that you feel safe enough to share this with us. Being honest with yourself, even if you don't open up with others in your life can only be a good thing. I am sorry that your family makes you feel so scared to be who you are with them. I also think that you are a very strong, creative and interesting person and if someone doesn't see that in you someday when you are ready, then there is something wrong with folks down under. Congratulations and you come here to vent any time you need to. Take care of yourself and your boys! Hugs and kisses.

[wily_one24]

Thank you.

Ugh, I think family is family and they will always be the ones to hurt you the most.

And thank you again.

[zaftig_darling]

Considering that you aren't even 30 yet, the likelihood that you will never have another partner is quite small. People are still getting it on in old folks' homes! ;-p

[wily_one24]

Dude, I'm 33. :D (but you can think of me as younger if you want to ;)

But, yes, I would definitely rate myself as a three (I mean, I'm not sure if there's an official test you have to take or anything, but... 3... to the amount of 3). Definitely regularly. I fantasise about both genders. A lot.

I don't know about having the opportunity to be with a woman. I think I'm terrified of it.

I don't think you smacked her for kissing a guy, i think you smacked her for cheating, which is a different thing altogether.

And it's not like I can hide my hetero side... I have kids and an ex-husband. There was no catholic miracle involved there. ;)

[jaq_of_spades]

So many things to say here, even though I don't know you much at all. I hope that's not weird for you. But I think this is something so many women (and men? I don't know) go through as they get older. I know a lot of women who identify as bi or lesbian who have children, and so many of them don't acknowledge it until they are in their 30s, or 40s, or later. Think of it this way ... you've done this while you are still young enough to build a life that satisfies ALL aspects of your sexuality. And you are single, which puts you in a position to explore that

[wily_one24]

Not weird at all. I am closer to online people than real life people (social awkwardness rules!). I assume a lot of guys go through this as well. Identification and sexuality is a hotbed of confusion, I doubt it's relegated to just one gender.

Ugh, i think faling in love with myself is going to be hardest part about this whole thing. It seems to be a common thread amongst everyone's advice and is just about the most impossible thing for me to do. I cannot remember a time when I have not been surrounded by people expecting me to screw up and fail and disappoint.

Yeah, the labels, I just... I can't with that.

I like your idea. Let's all just go with 'people'.

Thank you for your support, it is very much appreciated.

[jillianfish]

Thank you for sharing this with us. I hope you find a safe space here that you can't find with your family

[wily_one24]

I think this space is the safest one for me. Absolutely. Which is why I felt this was the pace to first come out.

This is all good advice. Definitely.

I find it hard right now to imagine that there will be more sexual encounters, but that's part of what I have to work towards I guess. That self confidence.

I've always written for me, that's not going to change, but I've never really had a backlash like that before. It was weird. And confronting. And badly timed.

Thank you so much for your support.

[sabinelagrande]

::hugs::

Welcome to the family, honey. It'll be okay.

[wily_one24]

Thank you!