This is great

[wingedw]

Here are the stipulations to the majority of the jobs I am most qualified for:

PREFERRED:
*Work experience in an academic institution or scientific environment.

***** Flexible work schedule is required. Will need to work late shift until 7PM Monday and Wednesdays. Must work around poisonous, carcinogenic, and explosive substances.

Comments

[digamma]

I think if something is already carcinogenic and explosive, whether or not it's poisonous shouldn't make a big difference.

[wingedw]

Well, everything is a poison in a large enough dose. Carcinogenic materials induce mutations over time; the extent of damage being largely variable as our body, amazingly can repair many mutations or perform apotosis to rid the body of the damaged cell in a programmed fashion. A poison, however, has a given toxicity that the body may not be able eliminate in a large enough dosage. That my friend, would be the end of the story; final hymn likely liver failure. Hurrah.

[docloki]

***** Must b willing to set aside hope and dreams to make room for occupational obsession.

They forget that one.