HELP MROW MOVE TO NEW JERSEY!!

via paypal....
cause it's time for the chancelor herself to kick ass!

the ambiance of this circumstance has become completely intolerable. i have had it. here i am locked away in some peditenturay with a tubby friend and a long-haired (yet extraordinarily pointy) nemesis. day in and day out it's "wake up!" "chase me" "no not there" "chase me up the stairs" "don't eat my food" "i dare you!". to any feline of average ( Read more... )

i feel dreadful
i just puked all over the rug

blast! that wretched beast returned! i thought he was out of my fur once and for all and then i hear the stomps of this monstrosity up the stairwell. that insolent girl inviting him all the time. he arrives and excites the K-9 to such a degree that i want to do nothing but claw his blasted eyes out. and then the monster plants his ginormity in MY ( Read more... )

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it has been a dreadfully long time since the human has left me with access to this internet you all speak of. i have much to catch you all up on ( Read more... )

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atlast i have discovered the perfect mechanism with which to expose my splendor to the world. it is day number 877 of my captivity by this rapulent slug they address as lauren. my opportunity awaits as she and the other mass dwelling in this borgeois house recline face-down on the oversized mattress they call a couch. next thing you know you'll ( Read more... )