Art. This Shit Is Crazy: Seven Works of Western Medieval Art Everybody Needs to Know.

[wizzard890]

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Find somebody. Anybody. Go up to them. Say the phrase “Renaissance art”. I can guarantee you that the following thoughts will go through their head.

Comments

[pyrrhiccomedy]

I have learned things!

Seriously, why couldn't you have taught my art classes? I might have actually cared. As it is, most days I can't keep Monet straight from Manet, and 70% of what I remember from Art History class was the professor entreating me to give a shit about pointillism. (Not gonna happen.) Or telling me for the ninety-seventh time that story about how Van Gogh cut off part of his ear because some girl he had a crush on wouldn't return his calls.

What I'm saying is, this was entertaining, and you have to walk pretty goddamn far to get me entertained by art history, unless we're talking about the French being catty assholes after WW2.

Also you are a genius, and I love you.

...Hee hee. "Ye olde love machine."

[wizzard890]

70% of what I remember from Art History class was the professor entreating me to give a shit about pointillism.

That is 70% wasted, then. Like. Hey, I drew a picture with dots once too, you know. In art class. In sixth grade. It was a raccoon. It sucked, just like the vast majority of pointillist paintings.

unless we're talking about the French being catty assholes after WW2.

...Oh man. If I had a better grasp on post-WWII art, I would totally artpost this for you. Uh. Well, I suppose there is always wikipedia to help me...Maybe it can be, like, a semi-birthday present. It will take at least until May for me to put together something worthy of the topic.

ONE ORDER OF CATTY FRENCHMEN, COMING RIGHT UP. ♥ Who also have mustaches for the steering of le love machine.

[pyrrhiccomedy]

=DDDD

IF YOU ARTPOST ABOUT POST-WW2 ART I WILL HISTORYPOST ABOUT

UH

SOMETHING.

IS THERE ANYTHING YOU WANT TO KNOW ABOUT? IF IT HAPPENED IN THE LAST FOUR HUNDRED YEARS, I CAN PROBABLY HELP.

Who also have mustaches for the steering of le love machine.

I think it'd be, like, le machine d'amour.

Alternately, I would accept a "Catty Frenchmen Through The Ages" artpost.

[wizzard890]

OH MY GOSH REALLY REALLY REALLY? =DDD

I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT MANY THINGS, ARIAS.

LIKE THE ROARING 20'S.

AND THE FRENCH AND INDIAN WAR.

AND OLIVER CROMWELL.

AND THE FRENCH FUCKING REVOLUTION.

I think it'd be, like, le machine d'amour

See icon.

"Catty Frenchmen Through The Ages."

Fucking done, baby. ♥

[irisbleufic]

The Ghent Altarpiece. It’s kind of a big deal. Unfortunately, being kind of a big deal makes Hitler want to steal you. And Arsène Goedertier want to steal you. And random black market art thieves want to steal you. Also possibly Carmen San Diego.

They should totally adopt that as their tag-line for the altarpiece. Visitors would flock to it and they would run the risk of it being stolen again.

This is sheer brilliance, just so you know. As a medievalist who knows and loves every one of the pieces you've discussed here, I can wholly get behind others learning to love them, too.

It's Lindisfarne, by the by :)

[wizzard890]

As a medievalist who knows and loves every one of the pieces you've discussed here, I can wholly get behind others learning to love them, too.

I'm just a bitty!medievalist, honestly, so it's so nice to know that these posts actually resonate with someone who knows their stuff! =D

It's Lindisfarne, by the by :)

Eek! I spelled it wrong everywhere but in the byline under the image. XD Fixed, and thanks!

[cpip]

This was actually quite interesting -- thank you!

I recognized the Bayeaux and the Unicorn tapestries; but the rest of this was new to me and fascinating...

[wizzard890]

Oh, I'm so glad you felt like you learned something! A few of these, like the Bayeux Tapestry, are famous for a reason, and it's good to be familiar with them, but the rest are just as important. They deserve to be as well-known!

[neocloud9]

[/can never look at the unicorn tapestries the same way again]

[wizzard890]

*tentyfingers*

[mithrigil]

:dons a red coat and red hat:

[wizzard890]