Odd to think...

[wondermentalist]

... I knew that tragedy can make people keep their distance.  I knew that most people, especially most young people, don't have any idea how to engage with someone going through things they've never experienced.  I knew that it's hard for some people to be around other people who are having a hard time, even if they keep a good face on it

Comments

[kevinbunny]

Yeah, like I said, it's that whole 'waiting for the other shoe to drop' angle.. once it drops, you're at reaction, instead of anticipation, so you can deal with it better.

[wondermentalist]

Well... I think the emphasis is slightly off. It's not so much that I was waiting and now I have something to do, which is a different, understandable thing.

It's more that - there was a huge up-front investment of time and energy and caring and worry. Now the worst is past, and all that planning and care and activity paid off, and events proceeded as gracefully as possible under the circumstances. Mission accomplished.

From here on, everything is more or less predictable cleanup, for which we had already planned and prepared. It's significantly less emotionally-fraught (as is common with lengthy dying processes, we did a lot of our grieving while Mom was still alive). It also involves a significantly lesser time-commitment, on a much less immediate, more flexible time-frame.

Like trading in a large, poorly-trained, high-energy dog for an outdoor cat.