HONORED BY MY COMMUNITY

[xanadutoo]

Once again the City and County of San Francisco have selected me from among my fellow citizens to be honored. I am a bit embarrassed to tell you this because I am a humble man who prefers to remain in the background, quietly being the magnanimous, incredibly wonderful person I am

Comments

[moochia]

Don't you feel special? I dunno how they do it in SF, but here in Van Nuys (AKA: The Armpit of Los Angeles), the Powers That Be go to some effort to let you know what an honor and privilege it is to sit on a jury panel. There's this swell little video you're made to sit through on your first day that details all the special joys and delights you're in for...and so much more (some of my experiences are here)

Have fun...and remember, you're helping to make America great!

[xanadutoo]

Thank you, Your Honor! You are an inspiration and I shall no go forth, bearing the banner of our nation's greatness. :-)

[pasticcio]

You poor thing - I sat on a jury once - well not literally, but you know what I mean :)

It was not a pleasant experience!

[xanadutoo]

It would be a very pleasant experience for me if you were to sit on me while I am a juror. Or, any other time, for that matter... :-)

[pasticcio]

You and I sequestered .. now that conjures up all kinds of naughty judicial scenarios!

[xanadutoo]

We could deliberate endlessly. You could complain to the judge about a hung juror...

[pixiespage]

just go into jury selection with a gun and repeat after me :"say hello to my little friend". i am pretty sure they will dismiss you from your duty. but many congrats anyway

[xanadutoo]

I knew I could count on you, not only for congratulations but for excellent advice as well. You are a goddess. Of course, I was hoping for some profanity... Uh, any hope of getting that today? :-)

[pixiespage]

slight chance of vulgarity with downward draft of shit expected

[xanadutoo]

LOL I am forever hopeful...

[marstokyo]

I'll leave it to you to fight the *good fight*. They tried to pull that crap on me a few times, jerking me around...interviewing me for a jury...only to get dismissed by one of the attorneys--and for NO REASON-- just YOU'RE OUT!! It was no Project Runway, let me tell you! Each time I'd try dressing my absolute blandest (which was really hard because I don't own any beige stuff--but I managed to pull together something that looked like a normal person *might* wear it. And I pulled my hair back. I even wore hosery and low heels, for God's sake. And STILL I'd get rejected.
Now I just tell them I'm mentally ill, and they don't bother me anymore.

[xanadutoo]

LOL the odds of getting selected here are quite high. Most people who are called are dismissed because they "can't speak and understand the English language"! WTF? They are citizens

[marstokyo]

That's amazing and horrible. The other thing that gets me disqualified for juries is I tell the truth. When they ask if I can be completely impartial and fair in rendering a verdict I say NO. I don't think ANYONE can be completely impartial unless they were Solomon or something. And yet everyone of the idiots picked stands up and says YES they can be completely fair and impartial. Ridiculous.

[xanadutoo]

When they ask me about the 'fair and impartial' I always say I'll do the best I can, but, I have also told them my background and all that. Most defense lawyers want me off immediately. What's ironic is that I know all the 'tricks' cops and prosecutors play and would be quite alert to them, which would work in the defendant's favor. But, so far I've never sat for an entire trial.

This time I'm called to the civil court side. I'll get to participate in trials about asbestos abatement. Now, there's something to look forward to!

[dishapeaches]

OhmiGod you're so lucky! I have never been lucky like this myself before. Ever.

Whew! *relief*

[xanadutoo]

Thank you. I've only begun to experience such luck in the past few years. I guess you have to sort of 'earn' the honor. :-)