about God helping me ( Read more... )

i write in this to sort out my thoughts. or to write down things I deem have some significance that I will need to remember later. Honestly, i dont' feel like ive gotten anywhere. I am in my 3rd year of college and i feel more lost than i did as a freshman. What am I supposed to do? I know thats not the question. What do i WANT to do? i haven't a ( Read more... )

I just got done watching  3 hour movie called "Islam: Empire of Faith". Its from the PBS series and Ben Kingsley narrated it ;P Very informative.......after watching 3 hours of nonstop historical narrative (and probably looking at a tv screen) my eyes felt boggled.....my head about to explode. I wrote down some questions I had which came up during ( Read more... )

So i was sitting on my bed......thinking of how ironic it is that I want to be depressed and tortued like an artist and create something spectacular. anyting worthwhile i think was done when i was depressed or the like. I have this dreams of doing something epic, something artistic thats FANTASTIC......these visions of grandiose sucess.......i ( Read more... )

 [20:48] [ Fail ]: any tricks for when you are despertly behind and really need to do shit..........yet you just can't bring yourself to do it?

[20:51] I'll be with you wherever you go, through the eyes of a fly on the wall: um
[20:51] I'll be with you wherever you go, through the eyes of a fly on the wall: just sit your ass down...remind yourself ( Read more... )

Im sad.......I found out a favorite band of mine, Thrice posted a new album early 2007 and i didn't even know about it. Well i did stop listening to them for a while. But when i was in my punk rock/hardcore/emo phase from 2005-2006 I listened to them ALL the time. I kind of feel bad im not so invovled with music anymore. I used to keep up with ( Read more... )

sometimes i have lost regrets for not being in a frat anymore. I miss the social action, the surface thin affection, etc. etc ( Read more... )

Ill make this short. As I have a psychologist appt to go to and then my english class for which I don't my assignments done. On defense I claim i didn't have time, but looking back, I guess I could've made time. Just so many other things to do, talk with my g/f, talk with friends, sleep. This morning i could get motivated and said "whats the point ( Read more... )

To do List : Of my life

1. start brushing my teeth more often
 (hurts when i eat sweet things like chocolate, i may have a cavity)

2.  Stop thinking about the past and imagining different scenarios of "what if I I did this?"

3. Stop thinking about all the "What ifs", period.

4. Stop worrying about the future, focus on the present. If i dont' then Ill ( Read more... )

 In a funk....behind in classes.......skipping classes....my weak lazy nature has finally caught up with me.....i know the solution...i just don't want to do it...i want to give up....sink into my bed where in my comfortable sleep world I can escape my troubles ive brought upon myself...thats true laziness there people....true laziness....true ( Read more... )