Comments | xcherry16kissx: I loved you you never had to say

xcherry16kissx

I loved you you never had to say

May 12, 2006 19:49

I'm beginning to have doubts about a lot of things and where I stand. I guess it's a little too late to be having doubts and second thoughts but the thing is- is that I am... I just don't feel like it's ever going to be enough like I'm ever going to be enough. Like I thought I would be okay with Ben's past and trying to get over the strip club ( Read more... )

Comments 6

gothicrainbow May 13 2006, 04:11:32 UTC

"Especially when we are complete opposities... I just don't feel like I even compare I feel like he did so much more for her and I can't understand it- and the thing is is that I know he does alot of me and he tries... but I don't know... I can't explain it ( ... )

xcherry16kissx May 13 2006, 15:28:10 UTC

I know exactly what you mean- Ben has nothing to do with his ex- but she has a picture of them on her myspace and it eats me alive and then I found an old website he had and it was this huge thing talking about how great she was and how they had so much chemistry when they first met and how perfect she was blah blah blah and im like that's not really something I wanted to read- but it was written a year and a half ago before we even met so I don't know what the big deal is but it still bugs me because I dont want to think he ever felt the way I feel about him towards anybody else ya know? and it just sucks because he did get married and thats one thing it said in the website was how badly they wanted to get married and they tried to get married all the time and stuff and it's like but he tells me it wasnt a real marriage- they were married 2 months and then he moved back to raleigh with his parents and they talked all the way up till july and then me and him met july 15th and he quit talking to her- like he said it never meant ( ... )

_impulsiive May 13 2006, 23:37:54 UTC

"I've just tried to convince myself that I am- because that's what you do. You never let anybody know your weaknesses because they can use it to hurt you ( ... )

xcherry16kissx May 14 2006, 00:20:26 UTC

Thanks doll- and you didnt make me feel worse it did make me feel better thanks :) you are right everybody does have a past and I'm sure he gets jealous if he thinks of my past- and you are right his past did turn him into the person i love. thats genius! Thanks for the advice it did help ♥

clayroxmysox16 May 16 2006, 00:40:18 UTC

NICOLE MOON!!!! Hun, when you are having feelings like this, you CALL ME. I never ever want you to feel this way without having someone to talk to. You're my best friend, and I want to be there for you ( ... )

xcherry16kissx May 27 2006, 12:55:41 UTC

aww it took me forever to get back to this since I Never go on livejournal I go on myspace lol. But every once in a while livejournal is refreshing. Yah it's hard to get over somethings but I just have to remind myself who he's with and who he isn't with. And sometimes i get upset because i know they still talked even after he met me (like 2 days or something for like a few minutes) but then I think i stll talked to charles so it doesn't make it any better. In a lot of ways I think we were in the same situation like neither of us cared for the other person but we tried to stay to avoid being alone and because there was nothing else to do. When really we knew we were making huge mistakes. Sometimes I have to look at it as in I basically did the same thing. and that helps. It also helps to not go to her page on myspace lol which i havent. But now I've just tried to look at it as something I did before too- even though I never married charles, I think that if circumstances were different and I wasn't in shool and stuff I would ( ... )