Pulse Point, Chapter One
I feel hesitant to say what I'm about to say, that this is the first Brian/Justin fic ever inspired by a mug.
Because I know that once I do, someone will go, "You newbies don't know anything about the golden age of the fandom, when the fan fic flowed like water and grew on trees and fell from the skies like rain! There are many great fics inspired by mugs!"
Which would, were it true, just prove that those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it.
Regardless, yes, this fic was indeed inspired by a mug, given by happier_bunny to _alicesprings, vamphile, and me for Christmas last year. This is the mug:
The premise of this mug fic - my first AU - is that Justin is a paramedic and Brian is a trauma surgeon at a Pittsburgh hospital. I posted this bunny at qaf_bunnies, but no one took pity on me and wrote it, which forced me to do so.
My banner goddess, roc_abs, took the image and my ideas and created what may be the most beautiful banner in all of Bannerdonia. Seriously. It hurts me, it's so beautiful.
While I did make some attempt to get the medical facts right, my standard was not "Will medical students and actual doctors be astonished at the realism?" but, "Will people who regularly watched ER and Third Watch feel satisfied that I did my homework?" Plus, while I feel that I raised the bar a little bit over QAF's level of realism, making the story a lot more true-to-life than the source material itself seems, somehow, unnecessary wrong.
Beta'd by gmta_nz. Banner and icon by roc_abs. Commas inserted - and in one case, removed, that must be a first - by vlredreign. Mistakes by me.
Just the facts: AU, NC-17, Brian/Justin
Warning: It has a plot
I hope you enjoy it. I certainly have.
Pulse Point, Chapter One
By Xie
Brian's POV
I looked up from the computer screen, and watched the trauma team rush in with the kid we’d heard had been caught in a drive-by shooting. One of the paramedics was giving a rapid report to the trauma nurse, while the other one, a blond guy I’d never seen before, rode on the end of the gurney, keeping pressure on the kid’s leg.
I rubbed the back of my neck, and went back to my computer, waiting for the team to finish stabilizing the kid and come get me.
Sooner than I’d have thought possible, Cynthia was standing next to me. She looked pale.
“Brian?”
I looked at her, one eyebrow raised. “Ready for me already?”
She shook her head. “We called in Vance.”
“What the…”
She put her hand on my arm. Cynthia never touched me. “Brian… it’s Gus. The little boy is Gus.”
Justin’s POV
One of the nurses from the trauma team deftly slid her hands under mine on the little boy’s leg, and I jumped down from the gurney. I always hated it when little kids got hurt.
I stood watching the trauma team go into action all around the kid, hooking him up to monitors and shouting orders. One of the nurses looked at his face, and gasped. She went to the phone, and told them to get Dr. Vance down there right away.
Another nurse looked over his shoulder at her. “Kinney’s on tonight, what the hell are you calling Vance for?”
The nurse just shook her head, and left the room.
I was done there, so I followed her outside, looking around for Daphne. She was at the end of the hall, filling out some paperwork. I walked towards her, unzipping my jacket.
She looked at me. “God, that’s a fucked way to start a shift.”
I nodded. “I hate it when kids get caught up in this shit.”
Daphne sighed, and signed her name with an illegible flourish. “Let’s go.”
She drove and I made a fast run for two coffees to go from the Starbucks near the hospital. We were sitting in the truck, waiting for the coffee to cool enough to drink.
Daphne blew on the surface of the liquid. “That kid was Dr. Kinney’s son.”
“Dr. Kinney?”
“The tall guy at the computer.”
I thought for a minute. She rolled her eyes. “The one who’s hot as fuck, don’t tell me you didn’t notice him. I’ll lose all faith in human nature.”
I laughed. “Tall, dark hair, beautiful hands, five o’clock shadow, soft lips?”
She smirked. “Thank you. I was worrying.”
Then I stopped laughing. “That was his little boy?”
She nodded. “Yeah, but his mom’s a lesbian or something, he plays for your team. Most enthusiastically, I’ve heard.” She grinned.
“Hmmm.” I suddenly felt uncomfortable thinking a guy was hot when I’d just brought his kid in with a gunshot wound to the thigh. “I think his little boy will be okay, though. Although that bone was a mess.”
“Yeah. That was weird. But he was pretty stable, considering.”
Just then we got a call that there was a second gunshot victim, at a second shooting scene a few blocks from the first. I looked at Daph, and she looked back at me, and flipped on the lights and sirens.
I kept my hand on the coffee lids as she slowed down to let some moron in an SUV pull over. “This is bad.”
She nodded tersely. “Shooting spree. Miss the suburbs?”
I looked out the window at the icy streets. “There were shootings in the suburbs.”
We pulled up in front of the gas station, where police cars and three other ambulances were already standing. The whole scene was a blinding glare of lights reflecting off the wet pavement.
“What the fuck?” I jumped down and stood staring. A cop with a radio came over. “This one was a mass shooting, ten people injured, two killed.” She gestured at a woman sitting in the backseat of a squad car. “She’s having trouble breathing, and has a pretty bad leg wound. She seems confused, too.”
Daphne and I assessed and stabilized her, and convinced her to let us transport her to the hospital. Pitt had shut itself to further traumas, so we had to head across town to the university trauma center. By the time we were on our way back, we heard that they were closing to trauma, too. It was a bad night.
Brian’s POV
I stood there looking at Cynthia with absolutely no comprehension of what she’d just said. I couldn’t even ask her anything.
I wasn’t sure I could hear anything, either. There was a strange sound in my ears, like hail hitting a car roof. Or static.
She spoke slowly. “Brian. The little boy is Gus. He’s stable. I called Vance.”
Whatever was holding me snapped then, and I followed her down the hall and into the room. Vance was examining Gus’ leg, and I flinched when I saw the mass of blood and tissue and shattered bone.
Vance looked up, and saw me standing there. His face didn’t change at all, and he didn’t say anything to me, just to Cynthia. “Get MacDonald down here right away. This bone is all over the place.”
Cynthia turned around and grabbed the phone near the door. I heard her paging Marianne MacDonald in ortho, and then I heard the hail in my ears again. I shook my head, and took a step closer.
Vance didn’t take his eyes off Gus. “Brian. Get out. I’ll come talk to you in a minute.”
I swallowed. “What the fuck happened to his bone? Did they use a fucking machine gun?”
This time he looked at me. “One minute. Can’t you just step out into the hall? It’s hard for me to do this with you watching.”
He was full of shit, so I didn’t move. He didn’t say anything, just finished what he was doing, gave some low voiced orders to his nurse, and then walked past me, gesturing at me to follow. Asshole.
I stood in the hall, in the harsh fluorescent light. His face was a mask, and I made mine that way, too.
“You saw the bone.”
I nodded. It was a shattered mess.
“Brian, it looks like a sarcoma. I won’t know for sure until orthopedics looks at it, but I’m pretty certain.”
“Brian?” It was a woman’s voice, full of tears.
“Lindsay.” I pulled her into my arms.
She clutched at me. “Did you see him, what’s happening? They wouldn’t even let me go in the ambulance, said they needed to keep pressure on his leg, and there wasn’t any room. I said they had to bring him here…”
If you ever wanted to really know how fucked up I am, all you had to know is that seeing Lindsay on the brink of hysteria calmed me down. I put my hands on her upper arms and looked right into her face. “I saw him, he’s stable, he’s not going to die. His bone is a mess, and we have an orthopedic surgeon on her way down right now. Let’s see what she says.”
Lindsay was crying and I pulled her into my arms. “What the fuck happened?”
“We were just coming out of the rest room at the gas station, and a car drove by and sprayed the parking lot with bullets. I grabbed Gus and threw him down on the ground, but one of the guys opened the back door of the car and…” she started to cry even harder… “Brian, he just shot right at us. And he laughed when he hit Gus.” Her eyes looked into mine. “He laughed.”
I glanced at Vance, and he looked sick for a minute, until his professional face slipped in place again. “Let me go see if MacDonald is in there yet.”
I took Lindsay into the trauma room with me, despite the fact that normally we’d have made the parents wait outside. Fuck the rules. I wasn’t just any parent.
MacDonald left Gus and met us before we’d gotten halfway to the exam table, and steered us back out into the hall. “The bullet wound isn’t that bad. Normally this wouldn’t even be an ortho case.”
I nodded, knowing what she was going to say. “There’s a sarcoma.”
Her eyes flickered to Lindsay, and back to me. “I can’t say for sure without a biopsy, but yes. That’s what it looks like.” She looked at Lindsay then. “That’s a form of tumor of the bone cells. You’re his mother?”
I didn’t know how much of our unconventional non-traditional family life had made its way around the hospital grapevine. But Lindsay just nodded.
We were standing in the hall while MacDonald explained things to Lindsay. I already knew the spiel, so I tuned it out. I saw Melanie at the end of the hall, and she saw me at the same time. We didn’t get along very well, but the sight of her dead white face might have made me feel sympathetic. If I could have felt anything at all.
Lindsay broke away from me and hurtled herself into Melanie’s arms, and cried harder. Mel looked at me over her shoulder. “What’s going on? Where’s Gus?”
I turned to MacDonald. “This is Gus’ other mom, Melanie Marcus. This is Marianne MacDonald, she’s the orthopedic surgeon who looked at Gus.”
MacDonald didn’t bat an eye at hearing Gus had two moms, so she either already knew, or didn’t care. Either one was fine with me. She simply pushed her red hair behind her ear, and started again at the beginning. Melanie had a lot more questions than Lindsay had.
I still didn’t say anything. MacDonald’s eyes kept shifting to my face, and then back to Melanie and Lindsay, but she didn’t address any of her comments to me.
Cynthia came out. “You can see him now, if you want, before we take him up.”
Lindsay and Melanie went in, and I stayed back for a minute with MacDonald. “How advanced is it?”
She shrugged. “I can’t tell with the gunshot wound. It’s not impossible this was a blessing in disguise. If you catch these early, you can do miracles these days. But we almost never do, except by fortunate accidents.”
I gave a short, bitter laugh. “Fuck you. I’m supposed to be grateful my six-year-old kid got shot in the fucking parking lot of a gas station, because it means we might have caught his bone cancer early?”
She didn’t put her hand on me, and her eyes didn’t soften. She just shrugged again. “I would be, if it were my son.” And she turned and went into the trauma room.
I stood in the hall for a long time, and then I went after her.
Gus was awake, amazingly, although pretty doped. He was blinking at his moms, not really saying much besides a few half-coherent questions. His eyes did brighten for a second when he saw me, though. “Daddy.”
I held his hand. “Hey, son. You’re feeling kind of bad, huh?”
He didn’t nod, just blinked. “Can I go home now?”
I shook my head. “The doctors here have to fix you up, so you’ll be here in my hospital for a while. But your moms and I will be here, and I bet lots of your friends will come visit, and everything’s going to be fine. But first Dr. Marianne has to fix your leg, so you’re going to have an operation.”
That fucking blink again. “Can’t you do the operation?”
“I’ll be watching the whole time, Gus, but this is a special operation, only a special kind of doctor can do it. I’m a different kind of doctor.”
His eyes drifted shut, but his hand was still in mine when they finally wheeled him away.
Justin’s POV
I’d only been working in Pittsburgh for a few days, but Daphne said that was the worst night she’d ever had. Our shift was normally ten hours long, but they asked if we could stay on an extra couple of hours. Some of the teams had to go to outlying hospitals, and response times were off.
We’d seen a cop car and stopped to find out what was going on, and they said the shooters were blasting all over town. They kept changing cars, and even though it seemed they were drunk or wasted or crazy, the cops hadn’t caught them yet. So we kept going to the scenes and helping clean up the damage.
It was after 2 in the morning, and we stopped at an all night coffee shop to get two cups to go. Daphne used the john, and I paid for the coffee. The waitress gave me my change. I stood waiting for Daphne, watching the TV news, which was repeating everything we already knew: the total death count, the numbers injured, that the shooters were still at large. That everyone should stay home.
We went back out.
Brian’s POV
I watched Gus’ surgery from the gallery. Lindsay tried to watch, but Melanie took her out after a few minutes. I didn’t feel anything, just watched like it was any patient. I let my mind follow the movements of Marianne MacDonald’s hands, my lips mouth the words she said to the assistants. When she did something I wouldn’t have done, my hands twitched. When she didn’t do something I would have done, I bit my lip.
The sound was on, but it was the peaceful background noise of an uneventful surgery. I saw her drop the biopsy sample in a bowl, and the nurse leave the room with it. I knew what the lab would find. I didn’t even think about it.
After three hours, it was over, and I went out to the waiting room. Lindsay was curled against Mel, and their heads were leaning together. Lindsay wasn’t crying, just staring at the wall. She jumped up when I came in.
“He’s fine. It looked good. I’m sure someone will come talk to us in a minute.”
Lindsay just dropped her ass into the chair and bent over, her head between her knees. Melanie stared at me for a few minutes, then leaned over Lindsay, rubbing her hand on her back.
MacDonald came in. She’d pulled off her scrubs, but nothing else. She didn’t waste our time. “The biopsy is definitely an osteogenic sarcoma, a bone tumor. I would say we caught it as early as I’ve ever seen. The chances we can treat this are extremely high.”
“Will you have to amputate?” My voice was flat.
Melanie gasped, but Lindsay was completely silent. I didn’t look at them.
MacDonald shook her head. “There’s no way to be sure yet. An oncologist will look at him tomorrow, and we’ll see. I can’t rule it out. But this early? A bone graft might be enough. We’re not there yet.”
She looked at Melanie and Lindsay, who were in shock. “Did you have any questions?”
Melanie licked her lips. “Amputation? Can’t they do chemo, radiation? Remove the tumor?”
MacDonald nodded. “Possibly. These are questions you’ll have to ask the oncologist. Sometimes we do get all the cancer cells, sometimes we don’t. This is a complicated and difficult kind of tumor. But as I said, I’ve never seen one caught this early.” She looked at me briefly, then back to Melanie and Lindsay. “As I told Dr. Kinney, the shooting could have been a blessing. Early detection is everything with bone tumors.”
I suddenly felt a wave of dizziness hit me, and I sat down. I glanced at the clock. I’d been at the hospital for 31 hours.
“Can we see him?” It was Lindsay.
MacDonald nodded. “Dr. Kinney can take you in.”
Gus was pale, breathing with a ventilator, and hooked up to every bit of monitoring equipment I normally took completely for granted. Lindsay ignored it all, and just smoothed Gus’ hair back from his face, while Melanie held his hand on the opposite side of the bed. I stood at the foot of the bed, and unhooked his chart from the IV pole. My eyes didn’t focus, let alone make sense of what was there. I blinked.
After half an hour, the nurses were glaring at us, and I got Lindsay and Melanie to leave with me. We sat in the waiting area again, and I leaned my head against the wall.
“Brian?” It was Lindsay. “You should go home, get some sleep, come back in a few hours. How long have you been here?”
I shrugged.
“More than 24 hours?”
“Yeah.” A lot more, but I didn’t say that.
Justin’s POV
Our shift was finally over. We’d been on for more than twelve hours. At some point the shootings had stopped. Maybe the shooters had finally passed out, or maybe they had gotten out of town. It had been two hours since the last shooting, though. It looked like it was over for now.
We were in the parking lot at Pitt, and Daphne had gone inside to fill out the hospital paperwork. I was sitting in the rig, doing our shift-end paperwork. The television shows always leave that part out. When I was done, I jumped out of the ambulance, my feet slipping a little on the icy pavement. I threw out a hand and grabbed the edge of the door. I headed to the hospital to find Daphne.
When I got near the doors, I saw a man in scrubs sitting on the bench in front of the door, staring blankly into the distance. He must have been freezing. It was that doctor, the kid’s father. I stood next to him, and after a minute or two, he shifted his gaze to me. It was still blank, though.
I sat down on the bench and put my hand on his knee. He looked at it.
“How’s your little boy?”
He looked at my face again. It took him a minute to answer. “He’ll be okay. You’re the one who brought him in. Thanks.”
I shook my head. “It’s my job. I’m glad I was there.” I saw Daphne come out. She hesitated when she saw me, but went down to the rig without saying anything.
He stared at me, his lips folding in. I let my eyes stay locked on his for just a few seconds too long, and then a few more. Part of my mind said, this guy’s a surgeon, you don’t even know him, his son just almost died.
The rest of my mind told that part to shut up. I licked my lips.
I saw his eyes soften, and he looked less blank. “Are you off now?”
I nodded.
He stood up. “Come home with me.”
He started walking towards the back of the parking lot, right by the truck. Daphne was standing near the driver’s side door, watching me. I paused as we passed her. He kept walking. She looked at me for a minute, and I just shrugged, and followed him to his car.
He pulled out of the parking lot, and I looked at him in the shifting light from the street. “I’m Justin.”
He didn’t answer right away. “Brian.” He didn’t say anything else on the way to his place. He just drove to a part of town not far from Liberty Avenue, and parked in front of a brick building. He took me in, and we rode up in a creaking industrial elevator.
His loft fit my idea of where a surgeon would live a lot more than the elevator did. He pulled back the metal door and I followed him into a huge space full of gleaming floors and high ceilings, with a wall of windows looking out at the skyline and the river.
Brian didn’t pause, just walked straight to the back and up a short stairway. I followed him, and he was stripping next to the bed. He didn’t even look at me.
I hesitated. It’s not that I never tricked. I did, although not very often. I didn’t need hearts and flowers, but I was used to at least a little eye contact. He hadn’t looked at me once since we came in the door.
But right at that moment he turned around, his shirt off, his pants open, his feet bare. And I saw something in his eyes, something raw. I felt my breath catch, and my stomach clench, and I walked slowly towards him. His hands reached out for me, and I let him pull me into his arms, and kiss me.
Brian’s POV
When I turned around, I realized I’d lost him. He hadn’t so much as taken off his jacket, and he looked like he was about to run. And right at that moment, I didn’t want him to.
I don’t know what changed, but he started to walk towards me, and when he was a couple of feet away, instead of making him cross the last bit of distance, I reached out and pulled him into my arms.
He had the most beautiful mouth, soft and wide. I kissed him for a long time, his hands on the back of my neck, mine in his hair. He was warm, and in a few minutes he was naked. I’d thrown his jacket and shirt in the corner, and pushed his pants down around his feet.
He stepped out of them, and then he finished unfastening mine, and pushed them down. I saw him bite his lip when he saw my cock, but he didn’t say anything, just stepped back up against me, both of us naked now, skin touching everywhere.
I kissed him again. I pushed my tongue inside his mouth and licked his tongue, then pulled back and nibbled at his lips. He was rubbing his dick against my hip and moaning into my mouth. His hand dropped down between us, and he grasped my cock, making me groan.
I broke the contact between our mouths, and touched my forehead to his. “What was your name again?”
I saw hurt in his eyes, but just for a second. “Justin.”
I kissed him. “Justin. I want to eat your ass. And then I want to fuck it.”
He just stared at me, and he blushed. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d fucked a guy who blushed. I walked him backwards towards the bed, and pushed him down. He hesitated a second and rolled onto his stomach, and spread his thighs.
He had a beautiful ass, and from the way he looked at me over his shoulder, he knew it. But I didn’t say anything. I just smiled a little, and put my hand on the small of his back while I knelt behind him, between his spread legs. I kissed the back of his neck, and his shoulders, and he stretched and purred under my mouth. I licked every little bump in his spine, and let my tongue play in the hollows above his ass.
I finally let my hands rest on his cheeks, and slightly pulled them apart. I licked slowly down his crack, keeping him from pushing up off the bed, holding him flat. He was moaning and humping the mattress.
I let my tongue pass over his hole. I licked behind his balls, and then I licked his balls, gently pulling them back with one hand, and sucking on them. Then I let my tongue go back to his hole, and licked and nibbled at it. I worked my tongue inside, feeling how tight he was, and my cock jerked at the thought of being inside him.
He was rocking harder into the bed again, and I kept licking at his hole, fucking him with my tongue. He finally looked back at me again, and moaned to me to fuck him.
I got a condom off the nightstand and put it on, then filled my palm with lube. I rubbed it on my dick, then slowly finger fucked him until I thought I could slip in a second finger.
This time when he tried to get up on his knees I let him, let him push back on my hand and fuck himself on it. Then I put my hand on his back, holding him still, and pulled my fingers out.
I put my cock at his hole and pushed in. From the minute I saw him outside the hospital, I’d wanted this, wanted to slide my dick into something tight and wet. Wanted to see him naked and moaning under me on my bed. Wanted to use this constricted heat like white noise, to wipe my mind clean for a little while. But now that he was here, spread out, letting me in, all I could think about was how soft his skin was, what his lips had felt like when I kissed them, how the sound of his moans shot through me like lust.
I rocked myself deeper into him, knowing I was hitting his prostate from the way he cried out when I stroked across it. I held his hips and kept doing it, over and over, watching his fists clench the sheets and sweat break out across his back. I bent down and licked at it, then kissed him. Finally I rested my forehead on the damp skin between his shoulder blades, gripped his hips, and fucked him hard.
My face was wet with my sweat and his. He was slamming back into me, and I knew he was close to coming. I moved my hand under him, and the skin was tight on his cock. The head was wet, and I smeared the pre-come down the shaft while I let him fuck my fist.
He choked and clamped down on my cock with his ass, and I felt hot come on my hand under him. The contractions milked my orgasm out of me, and I pressed my whole face into his back and tried not to yell. It almost hurt, I came so hard, burning and spurting into the condom deep inside him.
I fell onto his back, and he fell down to the bed. My heart was pounding. I worked my hand out from under him, and the weight of all those hours without sleep, all the tension and fear, caught up with me. I pulled myself out of him, stripped off the condom, and dropped down again, my hand curling itself around his upper arm while I fell suddenly asleep.
Justin’s POV
I heard an unfamiliar phone ringing, and a man’s voice swearing. My mind was a perfect blank, and I almost fell back to sleep.
After a minute I remembered where I was, and rolled over. My ass was sore and my back was stiff.
Brian was on the phone, and he got out of bed and walked out of the bedroom, naked. I went into the bathroom and pissed. I could still hear him talking - actually shouting - in the other room. I looked speculatively at the shower, and decided if he could fuck me and pass out on my back, he could spare a little soap and water.
I was standing under the shower spray, letting the hot water ease the stiffness in my back, when he opened the door and got in with me.
“Was that the hospital? How’s your son?”
He gave me a weird look, which I couldn’t interpret, and then dumped half a bottle of shampoo on his hands. He didn’t use it on himself, though; he started washing my hair. It felt good. I let him.
My eyes were closed and the soap was running down my face and body. He held me under the water, kept moving his hands over my wet skin. I shook my head and opened my eyes, and looked down at his cock.
It was hanging there, half-hard. When I’d seen it the night before, I’d wanted it in my mouth, and I decided I’d waited long enough. I kissed my way down his wet body, tracing the curve of every one of his beautiful, lean muscles until I got to his pubes. I buried my face in them, and slid my hands around behind him, tucking them under the curve of his ass, at the tops of his thighs.
I licked at the head of his cock, and felt it moving and growing under my tongue. Brian had his hands in my hair, and I looked up through the water and steam. His face was tipped back, his eyes closed, and he was rocking gently against my lips.
I lapped at the sensitive spot under the rim of his dick, and then wrapped my lips around him and slid down slowly. He gave a sharp groan when he bumped the back of my throat. I changed my angle a little, opened my throat, and swallowed around him.
His fists clenched in my hair, and I started pumping my head up and down on him. I used my tongue and my lips and my throat, and after a few minutes, I lightly slapped at his thigh. He knew what I was telling him, and started to fuck my mouth, clutching me to him with his hands, while I deliberately swallowed around the head of his cock as it thrust deep into my throat.
I felt his come gushing down my throat and swallowed it all, then let him slide out of my mouth. I rested my face against his stomach for a minute, but he pulled me up and kissed me, deep and long. His hand slid down between our bodies, and closed on my cock. He slowly jerked me off until I came between us, the shower washing my come away.
I leaned on him. The water was still hot, and his hands were still moving on my skin. I was surprised, and tipped my face up to him, and he kissed me again. He was nuzzling my hair, face, and neck, and I got my arms up around him and just hung on. His hands were on my ass, and I felt his cock, still half-hard, against my thigh.
Something about the water and the feel of his hands made me feel like none of this was real. I let him kiss and stroke me, and after a few minutes, I felt my own cock stir again. He noticed, and I looked at his face and saw him smile.
The water started to get cooler, and he turned it off and pulled me out of the shower. He dried me with a towel, then dried himself. He gently dried my cock and thighs and ass. I was as hard as if I hadn’t already come twice in the last six hours. So was he.
He dragged me into the bedroom and pushed me down on the bed, and stopped me from rolling over. “I want to see your face.”
I just lay there, and let my bent knees fall apart. He folded his lips in, and lightly touched my inner thighs, and my balls. He took the lube, and wet two fingers, and gently eased them into me.
I put my hands up over my head, and lifted my head a little, to watch him. He was slowly fingering me, and I felt him start to touch and massage my prostate. I closed my eyes, and he whispered to me, “Watch.”
I opened them again. His face was rapt, watching his fingers move in and out of me, seeing me writhe against them while they kept a constant motion on my prostate. “I could make you come like this.” He sounded breathless.
I cleared my throat, and blinked. “Yeah. You could. But I don’t want to. I want…” I groaned a little as his fingers moved a little harder inside me. “I want to come with your cock in my ass.”
He smiled, and for a minute he looked completely predatory. He picked up a condom from the bowl next to the bed, and pulled his fingers out of me. He ripped it open, and rolled it down his dick slowly. He stretched himself over me, the muscles in his arms and chest straining. I let my hands run up and down his biceps, and lifted my legs up and wrapped them around his waist.
He pressed into me, so slowly I wanted to scream. I lifted up, wrapping my legs tighter and straining towards him, my fingers gripping his arms. He gave a hoarse moan, and pushed all the way in.
I grabbed him around his neck, and started rocking myself up, meeting every thrust he made into me. My cock was crushed between us, and I felt it leaking on the hard muscles of his stomach. He fucked me faster and faster, and I felt a burn and ache deep inside, and before I even knew it was starting, I was coming, spreading wet heat between us.
He froze on top of me, and dropped his face down and buried it in my neck. I held him while he came, and when he finally stopped jerking against me, I let my legs fall down.
He stayed frozen there for a minute, then reached down and held the condom while he pulled out. It hurt a little. He rolled off me, and got up. Without saying anything, he handed me the towel he’d used to dry me, and went back into the bathroom.
I lay on the bed, feeling shaken, but after a few minutes, I got up, found my clothes, and got dressed.
I went out of the bedroom, but before I could even remember exactly where the door was, he was there. “Can I drop you somewhere?” He wasn’t looking at me. “I’m going to the hospital.”
I remembered his little boy then. “No, I’m going to walk up to Liberty Avenue and get some breakfast.”
He nodded. “Go to the Liberty Diner. They have a great breakfast, if you like fat and carbs.”
I smiled. “That’s my favorite food group.”
He pulled the door open, and I walked out. I hesitated, then went down the stairs. He caught up with me at the bottom. “Are you sure I can’t drop you? I don’t have to be there for half an hour, I have time.”
I shook my head. “I’d rather just go. I hope your son’s okay.”
“Thanks.” He didn’t say anything more, so I turned and walked down the street.
When I got home, Daphne was on the phone. I went into my room and crawled into bed, and if she came and checked on me later, I slept through it.
It was dark when I woke up. I went out into the kitchen, and Daphne was there with Bill and Mark, two other gay guys from work. They were sitting at the table, laughing and joking. I made coffee and joined them.
Mark looked at me. “So, we heard you fucked the hunky doctor.”
Daphne was giggling. I glared at her. “It was the other way around.”
The three of them looked at each other. I drank more coffee. “What?”
Daphne fixed me with a stern eye. “Dish.”
I shrugged. “Let me wake up first.” The truth was, for some reason I didn’t want to talk about it.
I listened to them gossip for a while, not really paying attention until I heard them talking about the little boy we’d brought in the night before. Brian’s son. “What was that?”
Daphne looked at me. “Did you hear any of this?”
I shook my head. “Hear what?”
She sighed. “It turns out his bone shattered so much because he had a bone tumor. I’m friends with one of the nurses, she called a little while ago. And no, I did not tell her you went home with Dr. Brian.”
I wondered if Brian had known about his son this morning, if that was what the phone call was about. I decided I needed a shower. While I was in my room getting dressed, Daph knocked on the door and stuck her head in. “Want to come to Woody’s with us?”
“God, you’re such a fag hag.”
She smirked. “You love me.”
I smiled at her. “It’s true. Now get out.”
The four of us went to Woody’s, and were standing at the bar with our drinks. Daphne was trying something pink and sophisticated, and I was drinking a beer. I looked out at the crowd, and almost dropped the bottle when I saw Brian, playing pool with a dark haired man.
Daphne saw him, too. “You should go say hi.”
I shook my head. “I don’t think so.”
“How come?”
I sighed. “It’s hard to explain.”
She uncharacteristically didn’t say anything for a while. But a few minutes later, when Bill and Mark were engrossed in talking to each other, she slid closer to me. “Well, at least tell me, was he good?”
I took a swallow of my beer. “Godlike.”
She stared at my face. “Wow.”
I nodded.
“You could go over and say hi.”
I snorted. “Yeah, I’m sure he’d love that.”
“I don’t understand how you can have sex with someone and then just act like you’ve never even met them.” She frowned into her drink.
“You just can.” But I set my beer down on the bar. “I think I’ll go ask how his kid is, though.” Daphne bit her lip, but just nodded. I wasn’t sure if she was laughing at me, or worried.
I walked up to Brian and said hi. He looked at me, obviously about to give me the “trick who doesn’t know when to leave brush-off.” I just smiled blandly. “I was wondering how your little boy is.” I didn’t add “because there are reasons I’d talk to you other than to harass you about having fucked me last night, asshole.” Maybe he heard it anyway, because the disdainful look vanished from his eyes.
Brian took a swallow of his beer. “He’s doing okay. Have you heard anything more about him, or …?”
“I heard it turned out he had a bone tumor in that leg. How’s he doing?”
Brian stared at me for a long time, then took another drink, and shrugged. “He doesn’t really understand what’s going on. He’s doing pretty well. We’ll know more in a few days.” He sounded like he was reciting something he’d memorized.
I didn’t say anything. My mind felt oddly blank, and Brian’s eyes changed again. I felt that strange sensation I’d felt the night before, the pull to touch him, or be touched by him.
I didn’t move. I didn’t blink.
Brian folded his lips in for a second, than grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the door. I went with him.
He wasn’t holding my hand. His fingers were closed on my forearm, and he pulled me into the alley next to the bar. It was cold that night, but there were other guys there, although I couldn’t really see them in the darkness.
Brian pulled me into his arms, and I felt his lips touch mine at the exact moment my body fitted against his. His cock pressed into my hip, and I felt mine throbbing against his thigh. His arms were wrapped all the way around me.
I thought he was going to crawl into my mouth. His tongue was sweeping around it, touching my teeth and the insides of my lips, and my gums, and then he started stroking my tongue with his. I was holding his shoulders, my arms crushed against me. He backed me up until I was against the wall. His hands were on my shoulders, turning me around. I resisted him. I wasn’t getting fucked against a wall. In winter. By a guy I barely knew. “Brian.”
His mouth was on the back of my neck, and I felt his hands unbuttoning my jeans. I said his name again. “Brian.” But I let my head fall forward under the heat of his lips. There was electricity shooting out from where his mouth was touching my skin, behind my ears, down under the collar of my shirt.
I let him turn me the rest of the way around. I let him open my pants. I didn’t even notice the cold air.
I heard him opening his pants, and than a second later, I felt a finger at my ass, wet with lube. I almost laughed at how adept he was at this, until his finger pressing inside me, stroking on my prostate, stopped me from thinking about anything.
His mouth left my neck, and I turned my head towards him, wanting it back. He was ripping a condom open with his teeth, and I remembered the night before at his loft. I felt my ass clench around his finger, and my cock jerk. He looked at me, and I saw him smirk a little.
He was kissing me again, the side of my face and the back of my neck, kissing my hair and my mouth. I felt dizzy and hot. I forgot it was winter, and the wall in front of me was icy. Everywhere his body touched me was hot, and he was touching me everywhere he could, stroking me inside until I was begging him to fuck me. I pushed back on his finger and moaned his name, and he pulled it out.
He pressed the head of his cock against my hole, and I felt myself tighten. Just as I opened up again, he pushed in, just the head, stretching me, hurting a little. I groaned and spread my legs more, feeling him bending his knees to stay with me. He pushed in a little more, and then a little more, until his cock was nudging my prostate.
The feeling was incredible, his thighs on the backs of mine, his mouth still kissing me everywhere he could reach. He reached around me and started stroking my cock, his hand wet with lube. I let my head fall back on his shoulder, holding myself off the wall with my hands. I started to come, every sensation in my body coalescing into one spot deep inside my ass, spreading out through my balls and out my dick, pulsing onto his hand and the wall.
My ass clenching on his dick must have finished him off, because he pulled my hips into him, hard, and I felt his teeth close on the skin where my neck joined my shoulder. I reached back and up with my hand, touched his face, and moaned. He was still coming inside me, shuddering, biting me, kissing me.
Finally it was over. I felt everything stand still for a minute, his heart beating against my back, the heat still between us. And then he stepped away, pulling out of me, straightening his legs. I felt him pulling my jeans back up, and I fastened them with shaking hands. I turned around, and he was walking away, back out to the street. I leaned against the wall, feeling every cold brick against my back. I remembered then why I didn’t usually do this. Why I didn’t like to feel like someone’s anonymous fuck.
After a while I realized I was freezing, and went back inside to find Daphne. Brian was gone.
Continued here...
Because I know that once I do, someone will go, "You newbies don't know anything about the golden age of the fandom, when the fan fic flowed like water and grew on trees and fell from the skies like rain! There are many great fics inspired by mugs!"
Which would, were it true, just prove that those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it.
Regardless, yes, this fic was indeed inspired by a mug, given by happier_bunny to _alicesprings, vamphile, and me for Christmas last year. This is the mug:
The premise of this mug fic - my first AU - is that Justin is a paramedic and Brian is a trauma surgeon at a Pittsburgh hospital. I posted this bunny at qaf_bunnies, but no one took pity on me and wrote it, which forced me to do so.
My banner goddess, roc_abs, took the image and my ideas and created what may be the most beautiful banner in all of Bannerdonia. Seriously. It hurts me, it's so beautiful.
While I did make some attempt to get the medical facts right, my standard was not "Will medical students and actual doctors be astonished at the realism?" but, "Will people who regularly watched ER and Third Watch feel satisfied that I did my homework?" Plus, while I feel that I raised the bar a little bit over QAF's level of realism, making the story a lot more true-to-life than the source material itself seems, somehow, unnecessary wrong.
Beta'd by gmta_nz. Banner and icon by roc_abs. Commas inserted - and in one case, removed, that must be a first - by vlredreign. Mistakes by me.
Just the facts: AU, NC-17, Brian/Justin
Warning: It has a plot
I hope you enjoy it. I certainly have.
Pulse Point, Chapter One
By Xie
Brian's POV
I looked up from the computer screen, and watched the trauma team rush in with the kid we’d heard had been caught in a drive-by shooting. One of the paramedics was giving a rapid report to the trauma nurse, while the other one, a blond guy I’d never seen before, rode on the end of the gurney, keeping pressure on the kid’s leg.
I rubbed the back of my neck, and went back to my computer, waiting for the team to finish stabilizing the kid and come get me.
Sooner than I’d have thought possible, Cynthia was standing next to me. She looked pale.
“Brian?”
I looked at her, one eyebrow raised. “Ready for me already?”
She shook her head. “We called in Vance.”
“What the…”
She put her hand on my arm. Cynthia never touched me. “Brian… it’s Gus. The little boy is Gus.”
Justin’s POV
One of the nurses from the trauma team deftly slid her hands under mine on the little boy’s leg, and I jumped down from the gurney. I always hated it when little kids got hurt.
I stood watching the trauma team go into action all around the kid, hooking him up to monitors and shouting orders. One of the nurses looked at his face, and gasped. She went to the phone, and told them to get Dr. Vance down there right away.
Another nurse looked over his shoulder at her. “Kinney’s on tonight, what the hell are you calling Vance for?”
The nurse just shook her head, and left the room.
I was done there, so I followed her outside, looking around for Daphne. She was at the end of the hall, filling out some paperwork. I walked towards her, unzipping my jacket.
She looked at me. “God, that’s a fucked way to start a shift.”
I nodded. “I hate it when kids get caught up in this shit.”
Daphne sighed, and signed her name with an illegible flourish. “Let’s go.”
She drove and I made a fast run for two coffees to go from the Starbucks near the hospital. We were sitting in the truck, waiting for the coffee to cool enough to drink.
Daphne blew on the surface of the liquid. “That kid was Dr. Kinney’s son.”
“Dr. Kinney?”
“The tall guy at the computer.”
I thought for a minute. She rolled her eyes. “The one who’s hot as fuck, don’t tell me you didn’t notice him. I’ll lose all faith in human nature.”
I laughed. “Tall, dark hair, beautiful hands, five o’clock shadow, soft lips?”
She smirked. “Thank you. I was worrying.”
Then I stopped laughing. “That was his little boy?”
She nodded. “Yeah, but his mom’s a lesbian or something, he plays for your team. Most enthusiastically, I’ve heard.” She grinned.
“Hmmm.” I suddenly felt uncomfortable thinking a guy was hot when I’d just brought his kid in with a gunshot wound to the thigh. “I think his little boy will be okay, though. Although that bone was a mess.”
“Yeah. That was weird. But he was pretty stable, considering.”
Just then we got a call that there was a second gunshot victim, at a second shooting scene a few blocks from the first. I looked at Daph, and she looked back at me, and flipped on the lights and sirens.
I kept my hand on the coffee lids as she slowed down to let some moron in an SUV pull over. “This is bad.”
She nodded tersely. “Shooting spree. Miss the suburbs?”
I looked out the window at the icy streets. “There were shootings in the suburbs.”
We pulled up in front of the gas station, where police cars and three other ambulances were already standing. The whole scene was a blinding glare of lights reflecting off the wet pavement.
“What the fuck?” I jumped down and stood staring. A cop with a radio came over. “This one was a mass shooting, ten people injured, two killed.” She gestured at a woman sitting in the backseat of a squad car. “She’s having trouble breathing, and has a pretty bad leg wound. She seems confused, too.”
Daphne and I assessed and stabilized her, and convinced her to let us transport her to the hospital. Pitt had shut itself to further traumas, so we had to head across town to the university trauma center. By the time we were on our way back, we heard that they were closing to trauma, too. It was a bad night.
Brian’s POV
I stood there looking at Cynthia with absolutely no comprehension of what she’d just said. I couldn’t even ask her anything.
I wasn’t sure I could hear anything, either. There was a strange sound in my ears, like hail hitting a car roof. Or static.
She spoke slowly. “Brian. The little boy is Gus. He’s stable. I called Vance.”
Whatever was holding me snapped then, and I followed her down the hall and into the room. Vance was examining Gus’ leg, and I flinched when I saw the mass of blood and tissue and shattered bone.
Vance looked up, and saw me standing there. His face didn’t change at all, and he didn’t say anything to me, just to Cynthia. “Get MacDonald down here right away. This bone is all over the place.”
Cynthia turned around and grabbed the phone near the door. I heard her paging Marianne MacDonald in ortho, and then I heard the hail in my ears again. I shook my head, and took a step closer.
Vance didn’t take his eyes off Gus. “Brian. Get out. I’ll come talk to you in a minute.”
I swallowed. “What the fuck happened to his bone? Did they use a fucking machine gun?”
This time he looked at me. “One minute. Can’t you just step out into the hall? It’s hard for me to do this with you watching.”
He was full of shit, so I didn’t move. He didn’t say anything, just finished what he was doing, gave some low voiced orders to his nurse, and then walked past me, gesturing at me to follow. Asshole.
I stood in the hall, in the harsh fluorescent light. His face was a mask, and I made mine that way, too.
“You saw the bone.”
I nodded. It was a shattered mess.
“Brian, it looks like a sarcoma. I won’t know for sure until orthopedics looks at it, but I’m pretty certain.”
“Brian?” It was a woman’s voice, full of tears.
“Lindsay.” I pulled her into my arms.
She clutched at me. “Did you see him, what’s happening? They wouldn’t even let me go in the ambulance, said they needed to keep pressure on his leg, and there wasn’t any room. I said they had to bring him here…”
If you ever wanted to really know how fucked up I am, all you had to know is that seeing Lindsay on the brink of hysteria calmed me down. I put my hands on her upper arms and looked right into her face. “I saw him, he’s stable, he’s not going to die. His bone is a mess, and we have an orthopedic surgeon on her way down right now. Let’s see what she says.”
Lindsay was crying and I pulled her into my arms. “What the fuck happened?”
“We were just coming out of the rest room at the gas station, and a car drove by and sprayed the parking lot with bullets. I grabbed Gus and threw him down on the ground, but one of the guys opened the back door of the car and…” she started to cry even harder… “Brian, he just shot right at us. And he laughed when he hit Gus.” Her eyes looked into mine. “He laughed.”
I glanced at Vance, and he looked sick for a minute, until his professional face slipped in place again. “Let me go see if MacDonald is in there yet.”
I took Lindsay into the trauma room with me, despite the fact that normally we’d have made the parents wait outside. Fuck the rules. I wasn’t just any parent.
MacDonald left Gus and met us before we’d gotten halfway to the exam table, and steered us back out into the hall. “The bullet wound isn’t that bad. Normally this wouldn’t even be an ortho case.”
I nodded, knowing what she was going to say. “There’s a sarcoma.”
Her eyes flickered to Lindsay, and back to me. “I can’t say for sure without a biopsy, but yes. That’s what it looks like.” She looked at Lindsay then. “That’s a form of tumor of the bone cells. You’re his mother?”
I didn’t know how much of our unconventional non-traditional family life had made its way around the hospital grapevine. But Lindsay just nodded.
We were standing in the hall while MacDonald explained things to Lindsay. I already knew the spiel, so I tuned it out. I saw Melanie at the end of the hall, and she saw me at the same time. We didn’t get along very well, but the sight of her dead white face might have made me feel sympathetic. If I could have felt anything at all.
Lindsay broke away from me and hurtled herself into Melanie’s arms, and cried harder. Mel looked at me over her shoulder. “What’s going on? Where’s Gus?”
I turned to MacDonald. “This is Gus’ other mom, Melanie Marcus. This is Marianne MacDonald, she’s the orthopedic surgeon who looked at Gus.”
MacDonald didn’t bat an eye at hearing Gus had two moms, so she either already knew, or didn’t care. Either one was fine with me. She simply pushed her red hair behind her ear, and started again at the beginning. Melanie had a lot more questions than Lindsay had.
I still didn’t say anything. MacDonald’s eyes kept shifting to my face, and then back to Melanie and Lindsay, but she didn’t address any of her comments to me.
Cynthia came out. “You can see him now, if you want, before we take him up.”
Lindsay and Melanie went in, and I stayed back for a minute with MacDonald. “How advanced is it?”
She shrugged. “I can’t tell with the gunshot wound. It’s not impossible this was a blessing in disguise. If you catch these early, you can do miracles these days. But we almost never do, except by fortunate accidents.”
I gave a short, bitter laugh. “Fuck you. I’m supposed to be grateful my six-year-old kid got shot in the fucking parking lot of a gas station, because it means we might have caught his bone cancer early?”
She didn’t put her hand on me, and her eyes didn’t soften. She just shrugged again. “I would be, if it were my son.” And she turned and went into the trauma room.
I stood in the hall for a long time, and then I went after her.
Gus was awake, amazingly, although pretty doped. He was blinking at his moms, not really saying much besides a few half-coherent questions. His eyes did brighten for a second when he saw me, though. “Daddy.”
I held his hand. “Hey, son. You’re feeling kind of bad, huh?”
He didn’t nod, just blinked. “Can I go home now?”
I shook my head. “The doctors here have to fix you up, so you’ll be here in my hospital for a while. But your moms and I will be here, and I bet lots of your friends will come visit, and everything’s going to be fine. But first Dr. Marianne has to fix your leg, so you’re going to have an operation.”
That fucking blink again. “Can’t you do the operation?”
“I’ll be watching the whole time, Gus, but this is a special operation, only a special kind of doctor can do it. I’m a different kind of doctor.”
His eyes drifted shut, but his hand was still in mine when they finally wheeled him away.
Justin’s POV
I’d only been working in Pittsburgh for a few days, but Daphne said that was the worst night she’d ever had. Our shift was normally ten hours long, but they asked if we could stay on an extra couple of hours. Some of the teams had to go to outlying hospitals, and response times were off.
We’d seen a cop car and stopped to find out what was going on, and they said the shooters were blasting all over town. They kept changing cars, and even though it seemed they were drunk or wasted or crazy, the cops hadn’t caught them yet. So we kept going to the scenes and helping clean up the damage.
It was after 2 in the morning, and we stopped at an all night coffee shop to get two cups to go. Daphne used the john, and I paid for the coffee. The waitress gave me my change. I stood waiting for Daphne, watching the TV news, which was repeating everything we already knew: the total death count, the numbers injured, that the shooters were still at large. That everyone should stay home.
We went back out.
Brian’s POV
I watched Gus’ surgery from the gallery. Lindsay tried to watch, but Melanie took her out after a few minutes. I didn’t feel anything, just watched like it was any patient. I let my mind follow the movements of Marianne MacDonald’s hands, my lips mouth the words she said to the assistants. When she did something I wouldn’t have done, my hands twitched. When she didn’t do something I would have done, I bit my lip.
The sound was on, but it was the peaceful background noise of an uneventful surgery. I saw her drop the biopsy sample in a bowl, and the nurse leave the room with it. I knew what the lab would find. I didn’t even think about it.
After three hours, it was over, and I went out to the waiting room. Lindsay was curled against Mel, and their heads were leaning together. Lindsay wasn’t crying, just staring at the wall. She jumped up when I came in.
“He’s fine. It looked good. I’m sure someone will come talk to us in a minute.”
Lindsay just dropped her ass into the chair and bent over, her head between her knees. Melanie stared at me for a few minutes, then leaned over Lindsay, rubbing her hand on her back.
MacDonald came in. She’d pulled off her scrubs, but nothing else. She didn’t waste our time. “The biopsy is definitely an osteogenic sarcoma, a bone tumor. I would say we caught it as early as I’ve ever seen. The chances we can treat this are extremely high.”
“Will you have to amputate?” My voice was flat.
Melanie gasped, but Lindsay was completely silent. I didn’t look at them.
MacDonald shook her head. “There’s no way to be sure yet. An oncologist will look at him tomorrow, and we’ll see. I can’t rule it out. But this early? A bone graft might be enough. We’re not there yet.”
She looked at Melanie and Lindsay, who were in shock. “Did you have any questions?”
Melanie licked her lips. “Amputation? Can’t they do chemo, radiation? Remove the tumor?”
MacDonald nodded. “Possibly. These are questions you’ll have to ask the oncologist. Sometimes we do get all the cancer cells, sometimes we don’t. This is a complicated and difficult kind of tumor. But as I said, I’ve never seen one caught this early.” She looked at me briefly, then back to Melanie and Lindsay. “As I told Dr. Kinney, the shooting could have been a blessing. Early detection is everything with bone tumors.”
I suddenly felt a wave of dizziness hit me, and I sat down. I glanced at the clock. I’d been at the hospital for 31 hours.
“Can we see him?” It was Lindsay.
MacDonald nodded. “Dr. Kinney can take you in.”
Gus was pale, breathing with a ventilator, and hooked up to every bit of monitoring equipment I normally took completely for granted. Lindsay ignored it all, and just smoothed Gus’ hair back from his face, while Melanie held his hand on the opposite side of the bed. I stood at the foot of the bed, and unhooked his chart from the IV pole. My eyes didn’t focus, let alone make sense of what was there. I blinked.
After half an hour, the nurses were glaring at us, and I got Lindsay and Melanie to leave with me. We sat in the waiting area again, and I leaned my head against the wall.
“Brian?” It was Lindsay. “You should go home, get some sleep, come back in a few hours. How long have you been here?”
I shrugged.
“More than 24 hours?”
“Yeah.” A lot more, but I didn’t say that.
Justin’s POV
Our shift was finally over. We’d been on for more than twelve hours. At some point the shootings had stopped. Maybe the shooters had finally passed out, or maybe they had gotten out of town. It had been two hours since the last shooting, though. It looked like it was over for now.
We were in the parking lot at Pitt, and Daphne had gone inside to fill out the hospital paperwork. I was sitting in the rig, doing our shift-end paperwork. The television shows always leave that part out. When I was done, I jumped out of the ambulance, my feet slipping a little on the icy pavement. I threw out a hand and grabbed the edge of the door. I headed to the hospital to find Daphne.
When I got near the doors, I saw a man in scrubs sitting on the bench in front of the door, staring blankly into the distance. He must have been freezing. It was that doctor, the kid’s father. I stood next to him, and after a minute or two, he shifted his gaze to me. It was still blank, though.
I sat down on the bench and put my hand on his knee. He looked at it.
“How’s your little boy?”
He looked at my face again. It took him a minute to answer. “He’ll be okay. You’re the one who brought him in. Thanks.”
I shook my head. “It’s my job. I’m glad I was there.” I saw Daphne come out. She hesitated when she saw me, but went down to the rig without saying anything.
He stared at me, his lips folding in. I let my eyes stay locked on his for just a few seconds too long, and then a few more. Part of my mind said, this guy’s a surgeon, you don’t even know him, his son just almost died.
The rest of my mind told that part to shut up. I licked my lips.
I saw his eyes soften, and he looked less blank. “Are you off now?”
I nodded.
He stood up. “Come home with me.”
He started walking towards the back of the parking lot, right by the truck. Daphne was standing near the driver’s side door, watching me. I paused as we passed her. He kept walking. She looked at me for a minute, and I just shrugged, and followed him to his car.
He pulled out of the parking lot, and I looked at him in the shifting light from the street. “I’m Justin.”
He didn’t answer right away. “Brian.” He didn’t say anything else on the way to his place. He just drove to a part of town not far from Liberty Avenue, and parked in front of a brick building. He took me in, and we rode up in a creaking industrial elevator.
His loft fit my idea of where a surgeon would live a lot more than the elevator did. He pulled back the metal door and I followed him into a huge space full of gleaming floors and high ceilings, with a wall of windows looking out at the skyline and the river.
Brian didn’t pause, just walked straight to the back and up a short stairway. I followed him, and he was stripping next to the bed. He didn’t even look at me.
I hesitated. It’s not that I never tricked. I did, although not very often. I didn’t need hearts and flowers, but I was used to at least a little eye contact. He hadn’t looked at me once since we came in the door.
But right at that moment he turned around, his shirt off, his pants open, his feet bare. And I saw something in his eyes, something raw. I felt my breath catch, and my stomach clench, and I walked slowly towards him. His hands reached out for me, and I let him pull me into his arms, and kiss me.
Brian’s POV
When I turned around, I realized I’d lost him. He hadn’t so much as taken off his jacket, and he looked like he was about to run. And right at that moment, I didn’t want him to.
I don’t know what changed, but he started to walk towards me, and when he was a couple of feet away, instead of making him cross the last bit of distance, I reached out and pulled him into my arms.
He had the most beautiful mouth, soft and wide. I kissed him for a long time, his hands on the back of my neck, mine in his hair. He was warm, and in a few minutes he was naked. I’d thrown his jacket and shirt in the corner, and pushed his pants down around his feet.
He stepped out of them, and then he finished unfastening mine, and pushed them down. I saw him bite his lip when he saw my cock, but he didn’t say anything, just stepped back up against me, both of us naked now, skin touching everywhere.
I kissed him again. I pushed my tongue inside his mouth and licked his tongue, then pulled back and nibbled at his lips. He was rubbing his dick against my hip and moaning into my mouth. His hand dropped down between us, and he grasped my cock, making me groan.
I broke the contact between our mouths, and touched my forehead to his. “What was your name again?”
I saw hurt in his eyes, but just for a second. “Justin.”
I kissed him. “Justin. I want to eat your ass. And then I want to fuck it.”
He just stared at me, and he blushed. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d fucked a guy who blushed. I walked him backwards towards the bed, and pushed him down. He hesitated a second and rolled onto his stomach, and spread his thighs.
He had a beautiful ass, and from the way he looked at me over his shoulder, he knew it. But I didn’t say anything. I just smiled a little, and put my hand on the small of his back while I knelt behind him, between his spread legs. I kissed the back of his neck, and his shoulders, and he stretched and purred under my mouth. I licked every little bump in his spine, and let my tongue play in the hollows above his ass.
I finally let my hands rest on his cheeks, and slightly pulled them apart. I licked slowly down his crack, keeping him from pushing up off the bed, holding him flat. He was moaning and humping the mattress.
I let my tongue pass over his hole. I licked behind his balls, and then I licked his balls, gently pulling them back with one hand, and sucking on them. Then I let my tongue go back to his hole, and licked and nibbled at it. I worked my tongue inside, feeling how tight he was, and my cock jerked at the thought of being inside him.
He was rocking harder into the bed again, and I kept licking at his hole, fucking him with my tongue. He finally looked back at me again, and moaned to me to fuck him.
I got a condom off the nightstand and put it on, then filled my palm with lube. I rubbed it on my dick, then slowly finger fucked him until I thought I could slip in a second finger.
This time when he tried to get up on his knees I let him, let him push back on my hand and fuck himself on it. Then I put my hand on his back, holding him still, and pulled my fingers out.
I put my cock at his hole and pushed in. From the minute I saw him outside the hospital, I’d wanted this, wanted to slide my dick into something tight and wet. Wanted to see him naked and moaning under me on my bed. Wanted to use this constricted heat like white noise, to wipe my mind clean for a little while. But now that he was here, spread out, letting me in, all I could think about was how soft his skin was, what his lips had felt like when I kissed them, how the sound of his moans shot through me like lust.
I rocked myself deeper into him, knowing I was hitting his prostate from the way he cried out when I stroked across it. I held his hips and kept doing it, over and over, watching his fists clench the sheets and sweat break out across his back. I bent down and licked at it, then kissed him. Finally I rested my forehead on the damp skin between his shoulder blades, gripped his hips, and fucked him hard.
My face was wet with my sweat and his. He was slamming back into me, and I knew he was close to coming. I moved my hand under him, and the skin was tight on his cock. The head was wet, and I smeared the pre-come down the shaft while I let him fuck my fist.
He choked and clamped down on my cock with his ass, and I felt hot come on my hand under him. The contractions milked my orgasm out of me, and I pressed my whole face into his back and tried not to yell. It almost hurt, I came so hard, burning and spurting into the condom deep inside him.
I fell onto his back, and he fell down to the bed. My heart was pounding. I worked my hand out from under him, and the weight of all those hours without sleep, all the tension and fear, caught up with me. I pulled myself out of him, stripped off the condom, and dropped down again, my hand curling itself around his upper arm while I fell suddenly asleep.
Justin’s POV
I heard an unfamiliar phone ringing, and a man’s voice swearing. My mind was a perfect blank, and I almost fell back to sleep.
After a minute I remembered where I was, and rolled over. My ass was sore and my back was stiff.
Brian was on the phone, and he got out of bed and walked out of the bedroom, naked. I went into the bathroom and pissed. I could still hear him talking - actually shouting - in the other room. I looked speculatively at the shower, and decided if he could fuck me and pass out on my back, he could spare a little soap and water.
I was standing under the shower spray, letting the hot water ease the stiffness in my back, when he opened the door and got in with me.
“Was that the hospital? How’s your son?”
He gave me a weird look, which I couldn’t interpret, and then dumped half a bottle of shampoo on his hands. He didn’t use it on himself, though; he started washing my hair. It felt good. I let him.
My eyes were closed and the soap was running down my face and body. He held me under the water, kept moving his hands over my wet skin. I shook my head and opened my eyes, and looked down at his cock.
It was hanging there, half-hard. When I’d seen it the night before, I’d wanted it in my mouth, and I decided I’d waited long enough. I kissed my way down his wet body, tracing the curve of every one of his beautiful, lean muscles until I got to his pubes. I buried my face in them, and slid my hands around behind him, tucking them under the curve of his ass, at the tops of his thighs.
I licked at the head of his cock, and felt it moving and growing under my tongue. Brian had his hands in my hair, and I looked up through the water and steam. His face was tipped back, his eyes closed, and he was rocking gently against my lips.
I lapped at the sensitive spot under the rim of his dick, and then wrapped my lips around him and slid down slowly. He gave a sharp groan when he bumped the back of my throat. I changed my angle a little, opened my throat, and swallowed around him.
His fists clenched in my hair, and I started pumping my head up and down on him. I used my tongue and my lips and my throat, and after a few minutes, I lightly slapped at his thigh. He knew what I was telling him, and started to fuck my mouth, clutching me to him with his hands, while I deliberately swallowed around the head of his cock as it thrust deep into my throat.
I felt his come gushing down my throat and swallowed it all, then let him slide out of my mouth. I rested my face against his stomach for a minute, but he pulled me up and kissed me, deep and long. His hand slid down between our bodies, and closed on my cock. He slowly jerked me off until I came between us, the shower washing my come away.
I leaned on him. The water was still hot, and his hands were still moving on my skin. I was surprised, and tipped my face up to him, and he kissed me again. He was nuzzling my hair, face, and neck, and I got my arms up around him and just hung on. His hands were on my ass, and I felt his cock, still half-hard, against my thigh.
Something about the water and the feel of his hands made me feel like none of this was real. I let him kiss and stroke me, and after a few minutes, I felt my own cock stir again. He noticed, and I looked at his face and saw him smile.
The water started to get cooler, and he turned it off and pulled me out of the shower. He dried me with a towel, then dried himself. He gently dried my cock and thighs and ass. I was as hard as if I hadn’t already come twice in the last six hours. So was he.
He dragged me into the bedroom and pushed me down on the bed, and stopped me from rolling over. “I want to see your face.”
I just lay there, and let my bent knees fall apart. He folded his lips in, and lightly touched my inner thighs, and my balls. He took the lube, and wet two fingers, and gently eased them into me.
I put my hands up over my head, and lifted my head a little, to watch him. He was slowly fingering me, and I felt him start to touch and massage my prostate. I closed my eyes, and he whispered to me, “Watch.”
I opened them again. His face was rapt, watching his fingers move in and out of me, seeing me writhe against them while they kept a constant motion on my prostate. “I could make you come like this.” He sounded breathless.
I cleared my throat, and blinked. “Yeah. You could. But I don’t want to. I want…” I groaned a little as his fingers moved a little harder inside me. “I want to come with your cock in my ass.”
He smiled, and for a minute he looked completely predatory. He picked up a condom from the bowl next to the bed, and pulled his fingers out of me. He ripped it open, and rolled it down his dick slowly. He stretched himself over me, the muscles in his arms and chest straining. I let my hands run up and down his biceps, and lifted my legs up and wrapped them around his waist.
He pressed into me, so slowly I wanted to scream. I lifted up, wrapping my legs tighter and straining towards him, my fingers gripping his arms. He gave a hoarse moan, and pushed all the way in.
I grabbed him around his neck, and started rocking myself up, meeting every thrust he made into me. My cock was crushed between us, and I felt it leaking on the hard muscles of his stomach. He fucked me faster and faster, and I felt a burn and ache deep inside, and before I even knew it was starting, I was coming, spreading wet heat between us.
He froze on top of me, and dropped his face down and buried it in my neck. I held him while he came, and when he finally stopped jerking against me, I let my legs fall down.
He stayed frozen there for a minute, then reached down and held the condom while he pulled out. It hurt a little. He rolled off me, and got up. Without saying anything, he handed me the towel he’d used to dry me, and went back into the bathroom.
I lay on the bed, feeling shaken, but after a few minutes, I got up, found my clothes, and got dressed.
I went out of the bedroom, but before I could even remember exactly where the door was, he was there. “Can I drop you somewhere?” He wasn’t looking at me. “I’m going to the hospital.”
I remembered his little boy then. “No, I’m going to walk up to Liberty Avenue and get some breakfast.”
He nodded. “Go to the Liberty Diner. They have a great breakfast, if you like fat and carbs.”
I smiled. “That’s my favorite food group.”
He pulled the door open, and I walked out. I hesitated, then went down the stairs. He caught up with me at the bottom. “Are you sure I can’t drop you? I don’t have to be there for half an hour, I have time.”
I shook my head. “I’d rather just go. I hope your son’s okay.”
“Thanks.” He didn’t say anything more, so I turned and walked down the street.
When I got home, Daphne was on the phone. I went into my room and crawled into bed, and if she came and checked on me later, I slept through it.
It was dark when I woke up. I went out into the kitchen, and Daphne was there with Bill and Mark, two other gay guys from work. They were sitting at the table, laughing and joking. I made coffee and joined them.
Mark looked at me. “So, we heard you fucked the hunky doctor.”
Daphne was giggling. I glared at her. “It was the other way around.”
The three of them looked at each other. I drank more coffee. “What?”
Daphne fixed me with a stern eye. “Dish.”
I shrugged. “Let me wake up first.” The truth was, for some reason I didn’t want to talk about it.
I listened to them gossip for a while, not really paying attention until I heard them talking about the little boy we’d brought in the night before. Brian’s son. “What was that?”
Daphne looked at me. “Did you hear any of this?”
I shook my head. “Hear what?”
She sighed. “It turns out his bone shattered so much because he had a bone tumor. I’m friends with one of the nurses, she called a little while ago. And no, I did not tell her you went home with Dr. Brian.”
I wondered if Brian had known about his son this morning, if that was what the phone call was about. I decided I needed a shower. While I was in my room getting dressed, Daph knocked on the door and stuck her head in. “Want to come to Woody’s with us?”
“God, you’re such a fag hag.”
She smirked. “You love me.”
I smiled at her. “It’s true. Now get out.”
The four of us went to Woody’s, and were standing at the bar with our drinks. Daphne was trying something pink and sophisticated, and I was drinking a beer. I looked out at the crowd, and almost dropped the bottle when I saw Brian, playing pool with a dark haired man.
Daphne saw him, too. “You should go say hi.”
I shook my head. “I don’t think so.”
“How come?”
I sighed. “It’s hard to explain.”
She uncharacteristically didn’t say anything for a while. But a few minutes later, when Bill and Mark were engrossed in talking to each other, she slid closer to me. “Well, at least tell me, was he good?”
I took a swallow of my beer. “Godlike.”
She stared at my face. “Wow.”
I nodded.
“You could go over and say hi.”
I snorted. “Yeah, I’m sure he’d love that.”
“I don’t understand how you can have sex with someone and then just act like you’ve never even met them.” She frowned into her drink.
“You just can.” But I set my beer down on the bar. “I think I’ll go ask how his kid is, though.” Daphne bit her lip, but just nodded. I wasn’t sure if she was laughing at me, or worried.
I walked up to Brian and said hi. He looked at me, obviously about to give me the “trick who doesn’t know when to leave brush-off.” I just smiled blandly. “I was wondering how your little boy is.” I didn’t add “because there are reasons I’d talk to you other than to harass you about having fucked me last night, asshole.” Maybe he heard it anyway, because the disdainful look vanished from his eyes.
Brian took a swallow of his beer. “He’s doing okay. Have you heard anything more about him, or …?”
“I heard it turned out he had a bone tumor in that leg. How’s he doing?”
Brian stared at me for a long time, then took another drink, and shrugged. “He doesn’t really understand what’s going on. He’s doing pretty well. We’ll know more in a few days.” He sounded like he was reciting something he’d memorized.
I didn’t say anything. My mind felt oddly blank, and Brian’s eyes changed again. I felt that strange sensation I’d felt the night before, the pull to touch him, or be touched by him.
I didn’t move. I didn’t blink.
Brian folded his lips in for a second, than grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the door. I went with him.
He wasn’t holding my hand. His fingers were closed on my forearm, and he pulled me into the alley next to the bar. It was cold that night, but there were other guys there, although I couldn’t really see them in the darkness.
Brian pulled me into his arms, and I felt his lips touch mine at the exact moment my body fitted against his. His cock pressed into my hip, and I felt mine throbbing against his thigh. His arms were wrapped all the way around me.
I thought he was going to crawl into my mouth. His tongue was sweeping around it, touching my teeth and the insides of my lips, and my gums, and then he started stroking my tongue with his. I was holding his shoulders, my arms crushed against me. He backed me up until I was against the wall. His hands were on my shoulders, turning me around. I resisted him. I wasn’t getting fucked against a wall. In winter. By a guy I barely knew. “Brian.”
His mouth was on the back of my neck, and I felt his hands unbuttoning my jeans. I said his name again. “Brian.” But I let my head fall forward under the heat of his lips. There was electricity shooting out from where his mouth was touching my skin, behind my ears, down under the collar of my shirt.
I let him turn me the rest of the way around. I let him open my pants. I didn’t even notice the cold air.
I heard him opening his pants, and than a second later, I felt a finger at my ass, wet with lube. I almost laughed at how adept he was at this, until his finger pressing inside me, stroking on my prostate, stopped me from thinking about anything.
His mouth left my neck, and I turned my head towards him, wanting it back. He was ripping a condom open with his teeth, and I remembered the night before at his loft. I felt my ass clench around his finger, and my cock jerk. He looked at me, and I saw him smirk a little.
He was kissing me again, the side of my face and the back of my neck, kissing my hair and my mouth. I felt dizzy and hot. I forgot it was winter, and the wall in front of me was icy. Everywhere his body touched me was hot, and he was touching me everywhere he could, stroking me inside until I was begging him to fuck me. I pushed back on his finger and moaned his name, and he pulled it out.
He pressed the head of his cock against my hole, and I felt myself tighten. Just as I opened up again, he pushed in, just the head, stretching me, hurting a little. I groaned and spread my legs more, feeling him bending his knees to stay with me. He pushed in a little more, and then a little more, until his cock was nudging my prostate.
The feeling was incredible, his thighs on the backs of mine, his mouth still kissing me everywhere he could reach. He reached around me and started stroking my cock, his hand wet with lube. I let my head fall back on his shoulder, holding myself off the wall with my hands. I started to come, every sensation in my body coalescing into one spot deep inside my ass, spreading out through my balls and out my dick, pulsing onto his hand and the wall.
My ass clenching on his dick must have finished him off, because he pulled my hips into him, hard, and I felt his teeth close on the skin where my neck joined my shoulder. I reached back and up with my hand, touched his face, and moaned. He was still coming inside me, shuddering, biting me, kissing me.
Finally it was over. I felt everything stand still for a minute, his heart beating against my back, the heat still between us. And then he stepped away, pulling out of me, straightening his legs. I felt him pulling my jeans back up, and I fastened them with shaking hands. I turned around, and he was walking away, back out to the street. I leaned against the wall, feeling every cold brick against my back. I remembered then why I didn’t usually do this. Why I didn’t like to feel like someone’s anonymous fuck.
After a while I realized I was freezing, and went back inside to find Daphne. Brian was gone.
Continued here...