Wow... 301 lbs when I last checked in?  I mysteriously gained weight and now weigh in around 340 lbs.  From March onward has been an incredible health nightmare ( Read more... )

Since my last entry I had my first Christmas, New Years Eve and Valentines Day with Justin. Things are great between us. I think I was a little confused and scared for a while... things are genuinely really good ( Read more... )

Blood confirmed I am not pregnant.  It also confirmed that my hormones appear normal.  So it's something else.  They said the testosterone test got messed up so they will be re-testing that plus additional tests on December 20th.  My period is due tomorrow... or so I think... so we will see if it wants to show up this month ( Read more... )

"Sit back down where you belong in the corner of my bar with your high heels on... sit back down on the couch where we made love the first time and ya said to me there's something, something about this place. Something about lonely nights and my lipstick on your face ( Read more... )

The night was just shit.  I mean it was ok at the bar... mehh... Tried to just have fun but it's hard to when people have just died, Andrew was crying to me :( , Gary showed up and made me smile except that he maybe stayed for 30 minutes... Jessie cheered me up... conversations were mostly awkward with everyone else ( Read more... )

Got some exercise accomplished.  Phew ( Read more... )

It just really hit me that I haven't smoked in 7 weeks.  Can not believe it!!!!!! I take this one day at a time... I just can't freaking believe it's been 7 whole weeks.  My last cigarette wasn't even a good one, LOL.  I didn't even tell myself it would be the last one! Thank god for patches.  I need to write to Nicoderm CQ and tell them they are ( Read more... )

Shaking shaking shaking.

Appointment for bloodwork is made.

Show me your teeth
Called my insurance to find out where I can go for dental/vision.  Called a dentist's office but had to leave a message.  I have never been to a dentist in my life.  It's one of those things my mother didn't feel was necessary growing up and I've just never ever been.  Been ( Read more... )

So angry... I hate this house.  It's going to get violent.

I don't want to feel anything right now.

Dear Brad Lidge,

Please get the fuck out of Philadelphia.

- Nichele