Fuck, I just found this big snake in the road. It was a water mocasin. How do I know it wasn't just a black snake? Well, that's because we inspected it. We wanted to save it so we threw big sticks at it. Then it just slitehred away. Damn. I wish I could just slither away. SLITHER ( Read more... )

[[the shit is on fire and burning the roof down]]

Had some ghay ass court proceedings today. Actually, it was in regards to something that happened a long ass time ago, BULLSHIT. Everything worked out in the best interest of everyone.
She showed up too late to appear in court and had a warrant placed out for her arrest with no bond. Jail is fun!

SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD.

But what I really wanted was...

G4 award show.
[[smoke]]
metal
[[smoke]]
Donkey Kong
[[smoke]]
drink some beers.


( Read more... )

[[HIT LIST]]

Meep! New hair cut. Meep!

( Read more... )

Good metal is best next to sex.
Sex is best next to good metal.
Metal sounds good when having sex.
Sex sounds good when you have metal.

OK. It's official. I have made the phrase I S D for C! bigger than Tony Danza!

I have read it on away messages. I have heard kids in Orlando say it. Someone on my friends list in New Zealand even made a t-shirt with it on it. Now, as the master of stupid-vulgar catch phrases, I must come up with a new one. But only right after I record my I S D ( Read more... )

Do your best, suckers!

Bed becomes a safe haven, a form of clouds and heaven, when you are sick and weary. I float on my soft pillows and bury deep in my blue comforter, my perfectly stripped sheets. This fan is on high and it might, in fact, rip out of the celling at any time due to the velocity at which it is whirling above my head, but I am still sweating. Cold sweats ( Read more... )