An unreconizrd 714 number sent me a happy new year and my heart flipped st the hope of s thought that it was him. Iam such a hopeless loser. I just asked who it was. Most likely a wrong number, and deletedthe message bfore I could work mysekl into stupid heartache.

At leadt I stoppd crying before new years broke. And twilight zone is on that is

Dad surprised me asking if I wanted to go to Downtown Disney since I have nothing to do tonight. Drove all the way out there to have to come back home. Might as well clean my room some more ( Read more... )

I miss talking to him the most.

If nearly every chance I take breaks my heart is it that I am taking the wrong chances, too many, not enough? What?

I feel like I am being stunted at school ( Read more... )

... I woke up to the feeling of "nobody wants you". I hate this feeling trying to shake it is near impossible. All I want to do is sleep until my body greets over whatever is making it so gross with mucus and axing and to not feel so fucking lonely and unwanted. Is that too much to ask?

Why do I feel so alone? Why do I miss people who left me behind? Why do I still love him? Why?

...there is a new friend request, an unkown number, a new message. i hope it is from you.

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And when I Google random things I find results. I do really miss my Lion though. sigh. Brett Anthony Moore

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So much right now and I cannot handle the silence because I can hear it breaking to the tune of my loathsome thoughts. I cannot turn up the tv load enough, I cannot read enough, I cannot turn the thoughts down enough, I want to let go, I need to let go, lord make me let go ( Read more... )