Comments | xofreekaleekox5: tonight didn't go as planned

xofreekaleekox5

tonight didn't go as planned

Dec 30, 2004 22:19

Sitting there .. I stared at myself.I didn't see me though.I saw my state of sadness.I saw hopelessness..and lack of control.I saw some one who wasn't rejoiced at birth.I saw an accident.Some one worth leaving at the age of seven.Some one who isn't worth staying alive for.My own fucking mother didn't love me enough to try and be a mom.She did just ( Read more... )

Comments 3

violent_justine December 31 2004, 17:24:39 UTC

you're not pathetic. (((hug))) you have every right to feel the way you do. i hope you're okay after the cutting and the diet pills. hang in there - you are strong. i'll be thinking of you. <333

today :: xofreekaleekox5 December 31 2004, 18:43:01 UTC

When I woke up I had no apetite at all.(weird) I couldn't sleep at all last night.I stared at the ceiling until like 4 AM . And im not even tired today. I can't believe how many of those pills I took.There were three kinds and they all have ephedra and all that shit. When i looked in the mirror , I felt and maybe even looked a thinner.I know it sounds weird after just taking some pills that I'd lose anything..but it was weird.And there is deffinatly a difference.Thanks so much for your comments.
I don't feel very good today ..
<33

Re: today :: violent_justine January 1 2005, 05:53:47 UTC

wow, was your heart pounding like mad from all those pills? just taking 16g of ephedrine gets my heart going. but i'm on antidepressents and whatnot which might affect it...
how are you not feeling good? i hope you feel better soon. <3
i wish i could wake up and feel thinner! ;)