honestly trying to work through it....

[xordinarymachin]

So, after a little bit of thinking, I came to the conclusion that I have not been living in the moment.  My thoughts are all wrapped up in the future: when I will be driving, when I will have a new job, the new things I can buy, the new clothes, in the future, when I am fit, when I am thin, when I am pretty, when I am successful, when I go to

Comments

[megaxmaniac]

Slow down! You are young, and have a while to get all these things done. It's your summer vacation after you graduate from school. It's okay to take it easy for a little bit..

What do you feel you struggle with the most?

I've been drinking quite a bit lately. Yet I only do it with Anthony.. For some reason he thinks that makes it better... I don't know. I see it being a problem, and as of now my biggest problem. That and smoking cigarettes...

[xordinarymachin]

I don't know what my major malfunction is, lol. I think cigarettes intensifies whatever problems I do have... the "guilt" from that might be driving me crazy. My EDs kinda have me in a headlock and I just need to be practicing a more honest recovery. I'm slipping and I need to really get back on the other side before it all comes down on me. I am very afraid, and so it's time to change. I don't have to play games with my life anymore. Quitting cigarettes is probably a good idea. I have some inkling that I would really feel tons better.