These dreams, these nightmares.. What can I do? Not sleep? A brain cannot survive without sleep. I can't stand them though, the Voices; millions of voices in my head when I sleep. They are driving me crazy, I don't know what to do. Am I crazy? Screams, I scream in these dreams, but I have no voice. How can a being without a voice scream, much less ( Read more... )

As i am sitting in here, in my mind, tripping on acid. We all come to a whole, all the fragments of "sarah" are here, inter-connected, as becoming one. I feel as a whole, once again? But when, has sarah been whole? Never, NEVER they say. We were always here, LEAVE HER ALONE. That's all I can get. Who am I, Sarah Arbutus Tarvis? No, I am not, I am ( Read more... )

You know what, I have done this in awhile; posted that is. I went and read over my last few entries and I'm right, I SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO MYSELF! Chris is a fucked up no good piece of shit that will never change. I've been with him for over 2 years, married for 1 and he still has NEVER asked me who i was. He never took the fucking time to get to ( Read more... )

Went to the doctors today, the bitch thinks i'm bi-polar and won't put me on anything other than remeron. WHAT THE FFUCK. I ain't doing no thorzine shuffle thank-you-very-much. I took a unisom though, it ain't really fucking me up yet, hopefully it will, it goddamn better, cause id ont' want to be sober. sober is gay. Ian's coming home next week, ( Read more... )

people think they know rock, well my kind of rock, and all they listen to is led zeppelin, pink floyd, and the who. and most of them can't even spell their names right. i mean, i'm trying not to "hate" on anyone here, but i just don't get it. Most of these kids are the preppiest things i've ever seen, that use the word lol, and w/e and all that ( Read more... )

i fucking give up, fuck this. Okay sarah, lets go die now.

__BASICS ( Read more... )

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i wanna write a letter to chris, real bad, but i jsut dont' know what to say except i love you so much, and i want you back. argh.

♥