new journal...this one is fucked and full of too many things i dont wanna think about now....

http://www.livejournal.com/users/xxfeawenxx/

Hey, holly shit!!!  my best friend from greenfield came over to see me before i go home and he brought me a present!!!  oh MY GOD!!!!! he brought me the Disturbed 10 thousand fists cd cover SIGNED!!! OMG i almost cried!!!!!!!!!!!!! i couldnt believe it!!! i was soo happy i was speechless and i couldnt talk, and i was screaming!!!  it was the best ( Read more... )

It's amazing at much someone can want something so bad.  By the time I made it home from Purdue last Friday, I was wishing I was at home at Purdue.  I guess I just didn't need to know everything that was told to me...makes me feel like when I come home from break or one weekend, I won't have a home to come home too...Only a few things keep me ( Read more... )

What the fuck....contradicting....Underminding...Insecure...and hipocritic....when will boys grow up...even just a little...its very frustrating...oh well new day tomorrow...of studying...and being invisible to day light...nice...good evening to all....

I know I should wait and do this when my semester is really over, but I keep thinking of things I could write on here...so I wanna do it before I forgett.

I'll say I'm not going to regret anything that happened this first semester....it was all a learning experience...I know now that there aren't lot of safe places to go out to...and that you have ( Read more... )

The one of the hardest things to do is to ignore what you love...or to be ignored by what you love.  I have master the part of being ignored, for way back past elementary times...Mastering this new task of ignoring something is hard...for I know how it feels to be ignored...but how hard do you try until it’s not good?

It is suppose to snow today ( Read more... )

I was home this weekend, but its all ok right now...it was very mild compared to last weekend...i did get to go to a party and drink...it was in front of my family so they know now...which is cool, cause they dont care...there is this guy that has been wanted me to drink shot for shot and drink for drink with him from home...he was there, and ( Read more... )

Just want to make one thing clear...alot of this may seem to be very depressing...I know it is, becuase this is where I leave those feelings behind, so I can wake up in the morning smiling and thanking the stars above that I can live another day. This is my Out let for my black heart...bad feelings...sorrow...and anger...as so I dont take it out ( Read more... )

Why does everything end in ruin...what have i done?? left alone...and realizing i have nothing but my studies...i have realized that im alone with nothing and that i have nothing here...why does my heavan turn to hell when i need it so...why does it seem everyone turns the other cheeck when i wear what i feel out in the open...i try not to hide it ( Read more... )

So coming back is all i have wanted...but it seems that no one here could care less that i have come back...makes me wonder if no one saw me this week...if they would wonder what happened...oh well...im way from my house and i have a bed to sleep in...so im good for the moment...

So could some one maybe help me figure something out...?...I dont ( Read more... )