So, hmm. I'm not sure what brings me back here, just needed a place to vent, I guess. Rereading what I used to be, and remembering when the words were only clouded thoughts. Very Very Strange to see. How am I here and there and both at the same time ( Read more... )

What number am I? Where do I fall? After 1, 2, 3, how many things do you think of me. I hurt you. I'm so so sorry. It was something dumb. Something, some thing, same thing. Same dumb me. Screwing up again. Can't be perfect. Can't keep you happy. I wish I could never make a mistake, I want to be perfect for you. I can't stand the feeling that I can' ( Read more... )

Between you, my stereo and a bottle of wine, I'll have a piercing reflection tonight.
My world is as forbidden as it is fragile. Without its mysteries it cannot survive.
The dark always encourages. Whether it dulls or heightens the sense of consequence is left up to immateriality.
Why am I surprised? and why do I feel abandoned?

She'd cry herself to sleep, but she don't dare.

I've got a ghost that won't leave me alone. So I sleep with drawn shutters and live at night so that I can watch my back. The fire-water makes me drop my mirror, I always wind up walking over glass.

Everything is beautiful in the early part of morning, even if it is beautifully horrid.

Woah. I've been purified. Soul and body but not the mind. Never all three. The mind holds on longer than the others. I only yesterday decided I don't deserve what I keep letting myself fall into. I'm finally coming around. But I'm still teetering on the edge of too far gone. I was and then I wasn't and now I'm toddling about trying to remember what ( Read more... )

I got caught up in following my own desires, even though they didn't make a lick of sense. These cravings for some mediocre thing can really take hold, a frightening addiction to breath and happiness. A film I hadn't seen or thought of in years is suddenly playing non-stop in my mind and on my television. I pressed the pause button and almost went ( Read more... )

I'm not entirely sure what my state of mind is. Or why I have the crazy ups and downs. But it will all work out because there's no other way to go but forward ( Read more... )

Choosing family over family. can't wait for the guilt trips.
I'll be back on the 29th. till then, I'll be where snow actually reaches the ground. Denver.

I felt the urge to scream, just because I wasn't sure I still could.

Mmm. Inaudible noises that I hope you hear on the inside. I hope that I have made at least that much of an impression. For those whose company I haven't the pleasure of keeping on a daily basis, I push forward in hopes of being just that little bit closer that happens to currently be hundreds of miles away. Hope. 'Treally is the meaning, isn't it? ( Read more... )

Salt dragged across an open wound
The pain will make you well
Practice, Practice like anything
It's not human not to feel.

Strength is the most intoxicating substance. Let's fly.