But i have a responsibility, a person I would leave behind that is a part of me. I wish I could just die in a car crash against a huge concrete barrier or against a huge tree.

I just dont give a fuck anymore
Until that little face reappears in front of me

he said you only live one life, don't fuck it up being  unhappy

tomorrow -
never make promises

deception and dexterity -
so clever
so charming
such a cunt

depressed ---
wither into how it feels
to be a nothing
and a no one
who are you?
what do you think?
no one cares
blow you off
cut you up
sadists, them all
or is it you -
the cause to all
their problems?
punching bag
one time use
one night stand
its the life of
those who are
unworthy of love

youre never ever ever there

settling into a new place and ( Read more... )

i'm learning that i cant always say what i want

something i found in my recycle bin from a few months ago:

poem.
title: not now not ever
text:
its not that i dont know every word to every line
of your favorite song
or that i dont remember every moment and every laugh
its that i dont want to
i dont want to care
not now, not anymore
not ever

when do i give up?