Today's phone call...

[young_n_free17]

I just got off the phone with Michael, and I didn't mean to sound happy but I guess I did. I was happy to talk to Michael but I dont think he knows just how depressed I really am. I was thinking about starting up on both of my anxiety medications again so that I can try to stay somewhat okay. I miss him so much and it really really really sucks.

Comments

[sorikata]

Why would you not want him to know you're happy to talk to him?

[young_n_free17]

no its not that. its that he thought i was happy for some other reason. he was afraid i was with someone else or something like that. i have had a bunch of people hitting on me before he left and since he has been gone.

[sorikata]

Oh, I understand that. Insecurity is one of those gremlins that natural haunts long distance relationships. Its hard to do them for any more than a year.. at least in my experience.. and even then there's a lot of healing to be done. Best of luck to you.

[young_n_free17]

yea. it sucks. but it is still hard when he is here. i am a naturally nice person, and when i talk to people and hang out with them it comes off as flirting. but that is just my personality. i am not flirting. but a lot of guys haven't understood that. a lot of them have been trying to hook up with me even tho my husband is standing right next to me.

[gothickitten22]

What does your icon say?

[young_n_free17]

it says, "A tanker stole my heart. Love my 19K" and the other letters in the other corner are the intials of whoever made it.

[theocean85]

I know the depression feeling (Not from separation but from other things that are somewhat similar), and I know the need to take meds. Hell, there was a time when if I didn't have Zoloft, I never would have gotten out of bed.

It'll pass tho. That's the good news. :)