( text ) Karkat: Introduce self to the welcoming masses

Jan 10, 2011 22:52

-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board FUCKASS CITY

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asideglance January 11 2011, 06:51:49 UTC
That was rather difficult to read through...

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yourgoddamnit January 13 2011, 06:23:12 UTC
CG: GOOD BECAUSE IF I EVER HAD TO WITNESS THAT SHIT AGAIN I WAS GOING TO PROJECTILE VOMIT.
CG: I WOULD PREFER MY CORPSE TO NOT BE DESECRATED BY ANYONE'S LIPS.

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asideglance January 13 2011, 06:24:07 UTC
CG-san is not a fan of romance? I see...

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yourgoddamnit January 13 2011, 06:37:02 UTC
CG: WHAT? NO.
CG: THE EXACT OPPOSITE.
CG: I'M AN AVID COLLECTOR OF ROMANTIC CINEMA AND ROMANTIC COMEDIES, PARTICULARLY ONES STARRING TROLL JOHN CUSACK.
CG: MY SPECIES, IN FACT, HAS A ROMANTIC CONNECTION VASTLY MORE COMPLEX AND INTRIGUING THAN THE RELATIVELY LINEAR HUMAN ONE.
CG: WE HAVE FOUR WHOLE QUADRANTS OF ROMANTIC FEELINGS.
CG: OF WHICH NO HUMAN SEEMS TO EVER DIGEST IN THE SLUDGE I'M ASHAMED TO CALL THINK PANS.
CG: BUT NOWHERE IN THOSE FOUR QUADRANT IS KISSING CORPSES CONSIDERED ROMANTIC UNLESS YOU ARE SOME KIND OF SICKO.
CG: THAT IS CREEPY.
CG: THAT FACT IS A UNIVERSAL CONSTANT.
CG: AND IF I'M GOING TO BE KISSED I'M DAMN SURE NOT GOING TO GET THE FUCKING BREATH OF LIFE FROM MY IDIOTIC CAPTORS
CG: WHO I AM GUESSING ARE HUMAN OR SOMETHING CLOSE TO IT.

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asideglance January 13 2011, 08:14:36 UTC
...Now I am quite curious as to this collection. However.. I believe I understand your worries.

They are human, as well, I believe.

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yourgoddamnit January 13 2011, 21:50:22 UTC
CG: UNFORTUNATELY MY COLLECTION WAS LOST WITH MY PLANET'S DESTRUCTION.
CG: I DON'T EXACTLY HAVE THE DEDICATION TO FIND ALL MY POSTERS AGAIN EITHER.
CG: TOO BUSY BEING THE GUIDING FUCKING LIGHT TO SEVERAL PATHETIC LIVES AND WHATNOT.
CG: RECOUNTING THE PLOTS AND MERELY THE TITLES WOULD BE A WASTE OF EFFORT SINCE THE ENTIRE DAMNED PREMISE OF THE QUADRANTS IS LOST ON HUMANS, AS REPEATED FAILURES WITH YOUR SPECIES HAS PROVED.

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asideglance January 13 2011, 21:51:08 UTC
I will have you know I am not human.

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yourgoddamnit January 13 2011, 22:03:32 UTC
CG: I'M NOT SURPRISED BY THIS SHOCKING PLOT DEVELOPMENT, YET I AM INTRIGUED AND VAGUELY PISSED OFF.

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asideglance January 13 2011, 22:05:15 UTC
Is that so?

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yourgoddamnit January 13 2011, 22:07:33 UTC
CG: THAT WAS AN INVITATION FOR YOU TO ELABORATE.
CG: OR WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO SPEAK IN SMALLER WORDS?
CG: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU IF YOU'RE NOT HUMAN?

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asideglance January 13 2011, 22:09:19 UTC
I am the country of Japan.

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yourgoddamnit January 13 2011, 22:10:33 UTC
CG: WHAT.
CG: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

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asideglance January 13 2011, 22:11:20 UTC
I suppose I am telling you that I am an entire country. I have many human citizens, however, so I suppose there is a certain relation.

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yourgoddamnit January 13 2011, 22:12:57 UTC
CG: I DON'T KNOW WHAT ANY OF THOSE THINGS ARE.
CG: ARE THEY LIKE "PARENTS"?

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asideglance January 13 2011, 22:16:21 UTC
...How strange. No. A country is the physical territory of a sovereign state. It can also be divided politically...

It is... by most here, strange for us to be seen in any walking or speaking form. Many have called me the personification of the country. I suppose that is accurate as well.

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yourgoddamnit January 13 2011, 22:20:49 UTC
CG: HMMMMM
CG: I'LL BE HONEST THIS IS STILL AN ABSTRACT CONCEPT TO ME.
CG: THE "SOVEREIGN STATE" PART, NOT THE PERSONIFICATION PART.
CG: YOUR UNIVERSE SURE IS WEIRD.
CG: ALRIGHT I'LL BITE
CG: WHAT MAKES YOUR KIND DIFFERENT FROM HUMANS?

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