Lasting immages and portraits ( Read more... )

it is so hard, Every time i see him, everytime i'm around him, I see everything about myself that i hate. I am getting more and more depressed, how? I have everything! I have an appartment, in twenty days i have a house! i have a boyfriend that says he loves me and i cannot get out of my own head. I hate myself, i'm selfish, and stupid and i cannot ( Read more... )

why can't i stand anything? I don't know how i live anymore. I cannot stand myself, I hate everything i have become, everything i am, I hate that my boyfriend is hating his life. I cannot help him, I am not what he wants, I am not what he needs, It is sustained, but not for long, he will see. I want to be someone. i can see, i can wait, i cannot ( Read more... )

another time! like a blister filling and filling again and over again. my lungs swell with anger and sadness and i cannot breathe. I hate. There is nothing more to say, i simply and beautifully hate. I wish i could stay in this forever but i cannot, so i grow weak, i grow weary and i hate. It swells in my fingernails and i want to scratch and i ( Read more... )

And again, another twist. Yet another time the ground trells and trummels and flips around to reveal something beautiful in its insanity. So candidly. Like a fingerprint that burns and moves around to uncover what it may discover in its likeness. To move your eyes from one frame of mind to achieve perfetion while looking through the reflection and ( Read more... )

looking through old writings. Unbelievable. I try to be angry, but it's impossible. Because if I tap the surface, i will fall into an unbreakable step. I know, its not like i am not familiar with my own mind. I can pretend not to be because it's easy. It's easy to be clueless. But I don't know how long that will last. I get angrier every time i ( Read more... )

Red wine and terraces look out upon a city night
You hang over the ledge and swear to god that you're alright
Four decks of tarrot cards assure you that your future's bright
And only then can you be sure that you're alright,
You're alright.

in what cannot be selfless, we, as humanity, find our everything. From our day to day desires, to goals long term and momentary. Maybe, oh brothers, we are to disguise this, for fear of loathing by our lovers. But denying is a game we all should seldom come to play. however, should we have to? we will. In our lives lead by fear of being unmasked ( Read more... )

I crave for everything ( Read more... )

This is what i am, and this is how i bleed ( Read more... )