My Inner Life: Author's Notes
Projection Room Voices: So you've taken on My Inner Life then, have you? Brave woman. Well, ready to get started?
ZeldaQueen: Sure. *to viewers* All right everyone, strap in for a wild ride! This is My Inner Life, otherwise known as the My Immortal of the Legend of Zelda fandom. It's got it all - blatant Sue favorism, character derailment, the works! And to cap it all off this might be the worst Suethor in existence. Why? Well, while Gethsemane Butler, Stephenie Meyer, and Keiran Halcyon all wish that their fanfictions really happened, our Suethor - Link's Queen (very subtle) - actually does believe it. She honestly believes that the events of this fanfiction have happened to her. But hey, don't take my word for it. Let's hear from the nut herself!
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
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Author's Notes
Hello. Thanks for choosing to read my story. As you might know I have become a major Zelda fan in the last year. Ever since I played OoT I have grown a fond interest in Link.
ZeldaQueen: "A fond interest"? Is that what they're calling it now?
I started to notice that after I got really into it, I found that I have a strange gift. A gift to Lucid Dream.
ZeldaQueen: You know, lucid dreams aren't that rare. They sort of are, but you're certainly not the only person to have them. Wikipedia even gives tips on how to have them. Jesus, just started the author's notes and she's trying to Sue herself.
I started having dreams about Hyrule, and about Link.
ZeldaQueen: Given what happens in some of these dreams, I seriously have to wonder how old you are. Are you at the age when you get those dreams?
In a Lucid Dream you can control your dreams. The dreams became very real, kinda like a second life, and almost every night I would have another. Starting from where the last left off.
ZeldaQueen: Your sentences are really choppy, by the way. Did you really need to make "starting from where the last left off" it's own sentence?
Even to this day I still have them.
ZeldaQueen: Which has been how long? If you've been having perfectly continuous dreams for so long, you ought to seek therapy or something.
I find that they help me get through life. I know this may sound queer,
ZeldaQueen: *giggle snort*
but for me the dreams sure help me out.
ZeldaQueen: Um, you just said that. And how wonderful, the only thing that keeps you going through life is some wet dreams over a video game character. Sounds like you really do need therapy.
I have shared this story with many other people and so far all has liked it.
ZeldaQueen: No offense, but I'm pretty sure your goldfish don't have that broad of a criteria for judging fanfiction.
Now as you read this it is told from my perspective or first person view.
ZeldaQueen: So she's right here and now admitting straight out that her character's a self insert. Well, at least she's honest.
You will find that it is very detailed since I remember it all very clearly to this day.
ZeldaQueen: After the millionth description of your wardrobe, I can believe it. I still can't believe this is healthy.
The story takes place after OoT. Nothing after that ever happens. No Majora's Mask. No LttP, or even Oracle of Ages and Seasons. And there is no love relation between Link and Zelda, Link and Ruto, Link and Malon or Link and Saria.
ZeldaQueen: Because all of those games deal with Link going to other places, which would mean that he couldn't hang around and have hot tiger sex with your Mary Sue insert. Same with those poor girls. Yes, I'm angry about that. I know full well what you did to them all.
Because of my feelings about Link, the person that he gets involved with in this story is myself or actually is my persona.
ZeldaQueen: Gah, she's fully admitting that he's only with her because she wants it!
A persona is for those of you who need to know, a representation of ones personality, or in dictionary terms is, (Persona) n. In biology, same as person. So for all you future readers, this story is based on Jenna, a char that is a representation of my personality.
ZeldaQueen: Actually according to Jung, one's persona was their public facade, not who they really were inside. Phail.
But if you think this might be too queer then you shouldn't read this. THIS IS NOT THE TYPE OF STORY FOR THOSE OF YOU THAT DISLIKE, OR CANNOT HANDLE SUCH MATERAL AS THE CONTEXT OF THIS STORY.
ZeldaQueen: Caplocks ahoy! And stop using the word "queer". It's creepy.
But if you seriously believe you can handle the content of this story, then read on. If your squeamish about sex, then you should not read this, since this story is a REAL LEMON and there is a lot of that, heavily detailed.
ZeldaQueen: My dear, have you ever heard of Hogwarts Exposed? Or The Girl Who Lived? Now that was an awful sex-bonding. I personally think your fic is a lemon in that it leaves a sour taste in my mouth and occasionally causes burning pains.
And again, I find it rather disgusting and disturbing that you are able to recall, in such vivid detail, having sex with a video game character.
(Between Link and I that is)
ZeldaQueen: Because you are the only two that matter.
Especially during the bonding ceremony. There is also some blood content and strong adult language. So if that’s too much then you should turn back now.
ZeldaQueen: Please. This is the internet. You just ensured that every smart aleck for miles will be reading and flaming.
Now I have not finished it as of yet.
ZeldaQueen: Thank God.
I have to catch up, since the last dream I had was just after Link and I had the blessing ceremony for our twins.(Our 3rd and 4th kids) Right now there is about 100-150 pgs worth. I'm expecting it to reach at least 300-350 probably even more. I will try to up date as often as possible.
ZeldaQueen: Good God, four kids? And you're how old when you dreamed this?
I hope that some of you like this.
ZeldaQueen: I don't.
I do not mind sharing it.
ZeldaQueen: Given what you're about to say, I find that laughable.
But please understand that this is very PRECIOUS to me, as well as Link.
ZeldaQueen: Precious to Link? HE'S NOT REAL! He won't know you even wrote this thing! Your dream Link isn't real either!
So like I said, if the content of this story sounds, too queer to you, TURN BACK NOW! But to all who wish to continue, happy reading. Thanks,
ZeldaQueen: You're not welcome
~*~ Link’s Queen ~*~
ZeldaQueen: Is a whore
Rated R for strong adult language, sex, violence and blood content.
ZeldaQueen: I should hope so.
And strap in. Caplocks rage, full throttle.
AGAIN AS A FINAL WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS HEAVY SEX, ABULT LANGUAGE AND TALKS ABOUT MY PERSONAL ENCOUNTER WITH LINK. THIS STORY IS BASED ON DREAMS, DREAMS ABOUT MY LIFE WITH HIM. IF YOU FIND THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY TO BE OFFENSEVE, QUEER, OR PLAIN OUT OFF THE WALL, THEN DO NOT READ ON!!!!!!!
ZeldaQueen: Woah there, did your Prozac just wear off? And you already told us this stuff! If people didn't listen to it before, then repeating it in caplocks won't help!
I HAVE GOTTEN WAY TO MANY FLAMES ABOUT THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY WHEN I HAVE PLACED SEVERAL WARNINGS!!!!
ZeldaQueen: Flames are never good, but my dear, few if any fans appreciate canon rape, especially to your degree.
I WILL NOT ACCECPT ANY MORE FLAMES, RAMBLINGS, CUSSING OR EXCESSIVE LASHING OUT ABOUT THE CHAR JENNA, OR REVIEWS ABOUT THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY, EXCESSIVE LASHING OUT, VICIOUS ATTACKS AGAINST MY PERSONALITY, OR NON-MATURE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISIM!!!
ZeldaQueen: (Author) "In other words, only praise! Heap it on, get to it!"
ANY REVIEWS SUBMITTED THAT DO NOT FOLLOW THE ABOUVE GUIDLINES, WILL BE DELETED IMMEDIATELY!
ZeldaQueen: That rarely goes well. And "abouve"? Is that the phonetic Canadian version of "above"?
THESE WARNINGS ARE NOT THERE TO LOOK PRETTY,
ZeldaQueen: Good. They don't.
THE AUTHORS PLACE WARNINGS FOR A REASON!!!
ZeldaQueen: Yeah, and insane Suethors put capslocks warnings to look like twats.
IT IS TO TELL YOU WHAT THE CONTENT OF THE STORY IS SO THAT IF THE READER FINDS THE CONTENT OF THE STORY OFFENSIVE, THEY WILL NOT READ ON!!! MANY AUTHORS HAVE BEEN COMPLAINING ABOUT UNWANTED, EXCESSIVE, VIOLENT AND JUST PLAIN NASTY REVIEWS THAT HAVE BEEN SUBMITTED BY READERS ABOUT THEIR STORIES, CAUSING FANFICTION TO GRANT AUTHORS THE ABILITY TO DELETE UNWANTED REVIEWS AND BLOCK CERTAIN READERS!! I WILL SAY THIS FOR MYSELF AND FOR ALL AUTHORS ON FANFICTION. NO AUTHOR TWISTS YOUR ARM OR HOLDS YOU AT GUN POINT OR FORCES YOU IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM TO READ THEIR STORIES!! ALL READERS HAVE THE RIGHT NOT TO READ A CERTAIN STORY!!! IT IS YOUR RESOPONSIBILITY TO READ THE WARNINGS AND DECIDE FOR YOUSELF IF THE CONTENT OF THE STORY IS OFFENSIVE TO YOU, AND TO MAKE THE CHOICE TO READ ON OR NOT!!!
ZeldaQueen: Yadda, yadda, yadda, will you get on with it?
AND IT ALSO IS THE READERS RESPONSIBILITY TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY ON HOW THEY HANDLE THENSELVES WHEN LEAVING A REVIEW FOR AN AUTHOR!!
ZeldaQueen: "Responsibility to take responsibility"? Now that's just stupid.
LEAVING A REVIEW THAT IS VIOLENT IN NATURE ONLY MAKES YOU THE READER LOOK BAD, AND IS VERY IMMATURE.
ZeldaQueen: Says the lady giving the CAPSLOCKS OF RAGE
IF ALL US HERE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE ADULTS, WELL THEN, LETS CONDUCTIVE OURSELVES LIKE ADULTS AND NOT LIKE LITTLE KIDS!
ZeldaQueen: So can I safely assume that you're a little kid then?
I ONLY EXPECT THE VIOLENT LASHING OUT AND VICIOUS ATTACKS TO COME FROM TEENANGERS, NOT ADULTS!
ZeldaQueen: Because it's only teenagers who are violent. No adults who act in inappropriate ways.
IF YOU PEOPLE REALLY ARE ADULTS THAT ARE CONDUCTING YOURSELVES IN THE MANORS I DECRIBED ABOVE, YOU PEOPLE REALLY ARE SCARING ME!
ZeldaQueen: And your spelling is starting to scare me. But don't worry, I'll conduct myself in the manor you decribed. Now where are my serfs and the baby's bed I must take apart?
IT’S A DAMN SHAME TO KNOW THAT THERE ARE ADULTS OUT THERE WHO CANNOT CONDUCTIVE THEMSELVES IN THE SIMPLEST MANORS THEIR PARENTS HAVE TAUGHT THEM!
ZeldaQueen: There you go again! It's not the Feudal Era dear, we don't really use manors anymore. And did it ever occur to you that reviewers act like teenagers (as you put it) because they are teenagers? Not everyone on FF.net is an adult you know.
ALSO LEAVING MALICIOUS REVIEWS IS ALSO A SIGN OF LOW SELF-ESTEEM. IF ALL YOU PEOPLE KNOW HOW DO IS ATTACK SOMEONE VICIOUSLY, IT’S A SIGN OF SELFISHNESS AND NO RESPECT FOR ONES-SELF!
ZeldaQueen: Now this is just sounding like a lame attempt to fight back. "Yeah, you don't have any friends because you're just a mean old bully! Nyah!"
I SUGGEST TO ALL READERS WHO ARE THINKING ABOUT LEAVING A MALICIOUS REVIEW FOR ME, PLEASE GET A HOBBY AND LEARN TO CONTROL YOUR ANGER, BECAUSE YOUR ONLY HURTING YOURSELF, NOT ME! ALSO LEAVING A NASTY REVIEW ONLY MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID, NOT ME!
ZeldaQueen: LQ, please stop going on about people looking stupid and controlling anger. The irony is eating me alive. I might also add that you are the one writing a story out of your life-saving wet dreams, so you're hardly one to give advice on hobbies.
I FIND IT VERY RIDICULOUS THAT I HAD TO LEAVE A WARNING THIS LONG, BUT IT IS BECAUSE OF THE VERY IMMATURE READERS THAT HAVE SUBMITTED NASTY CHILDISH REVIEWS!
ZeldaQueen: I agree, that was ridiculous.
AGAIN, PLEASE READ THE ABOVE CONTEXT BEFORE READING ON!!!!
ZeldaQueen: No, once is enough for me.
Furthermore, I have realized that this story needs some heavy grammar corrections, and that the plot needs some work.
ZeldaQueen: Oh God, does it! The plot needs "some work" like a 9/11 conspiracy theorist needs "some brains"
Also under the advisement of my friend who had just recently completed two literature classes, has stated the reasons why people had classified Jenna as a “Mary Sue” char and labeled her as “flat”.
ZeldaQueen: I don't think you need two literature classes to figure that out, darling.
She has come to the conclusion that most people do not know or understand Jenna’s history, so she has advised me to create an origin story to explain about her history before she met Link. That way she will become more rounded and give people a reason to care about her.
ZeldaQueen: At the risk of spoiling things for the viewers, we never really get a backstory anyway. So nice of Link's Queen to take constructive criticism into account.
It was never in my intentions to create Jenna as a “Mary Sue” char or to make her conceited, because I’m not really like that.
ZeldaQueen: "Not really like that"? Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!! Right, and Keiran Halcyon never meant to make Rose Potter a Mary Sue because she's so much better than Harry!
Jenna is a persona char, one that resembles my personality while this story is being told from her perspective.
ZeldaQueen: If she represents you and she's conceited, then that kind of implies that you are conceited also. Or a really bad writer.
Good gravy, I'm getting Twilight flashbacks here!
This story is not something that I pulled out of my head like my drawings, it came from my dreams.
ZeldaQueen: As you've told us five billion times by now.
So I understand that revising this story is going to be hard work and will take time.
ZeldaQueen: Why didn't you make these revisions before posting this fanfiction online? You could have spared us this rant.
Since this story is being told in the exact, or close to exact order it happened in the dreams, changing how fast Link and Jenna marry isn’t going to be easy. Even changing how fast they have sex and revising the Lemon parts also won’t be so easy to do.
ZeldaQueen: Huh, looks like the Suethor's found the ultimate excuse for her bad writing. "It's not my fault it all happened unrealistically! That's how it happened in the dream! I was just writing how it happened!"
Wait a second, Stephenie Meyer wrote Twilight as per her own dream dictated...
I just went cold.
But I’m currently in the process of revising this story, also I have received a college grammar book from my friend and I will be investing in a Beta-Reader.
ZeldaQueen: How about Microsoft Word's spell check and grammar check features? And beta-readers are usually free, aren't they?
I’m also considering taking to literature classes at JC to help boost my writing skills. But now I say this, if you people, the reviewers really have the intentions to help me, them please do it positively and like a mature adult. I’m telling you that it is a proven fact that negative motivation NEVER motivates someone to change. It never has and it never will. I’m pretty sure your parents have taught you that people only respond to positive motivation and not negative.
ZeldaQueen: I applaud her for her apparent willingness to accept constructive criticism, but the sheer fail of this fic makes me dock her any earned points.
I’m not close-minded, I NEVER have been.
ZeldaQueen: Pfftt!!!
I have always been open to other people’s thoughts and opinions, its when its done in an inappropriate manner that I turn my nose at it and look away. People have to understand that when you’re an adult, you need to conduct yourself like one and learn how to address other people like one. You cannot just act childish when you come across something that you DO NOT approve of, you’re only making yourself look bad and that can affect you later on in life. Acting childish and ranting and raving is something I’d expect a little kid would do when he doesn’t get his way. When an adult acts childish over stupid things, that’s looked down upon, and considered to be unhealthy. I have seen far too many reviews left for me where the reviewers are just ranting and raving like little kids over this story because they do not like it. It is only making them look stupid and is very unhealthy. I fear that these people have some serious emotional problems if they get that upset over a story. People in control of their emotions and have also obtained some sort of common sense, NEVER let little things get them all riled up. It is very sad when one that is supposed to be an adult, cannot handle them like one. I was NEVER angry with the reviewers not liking the story, it’s how they handled themselves when leaving me the reviews. Getting riled up, ranting and raving, screaming and spitting nails over this story is what has caused me to get upset, not the fact that they didn’t like it.
ZeldaQueen: Glad to hear all of that. Now are we actually going to get this story now?
Also as a side note, I NEVER physically hurt ANYONE with this story.
ZeldaQueen: Apparently not.
I got one reviewer that said. “Oh God please stop writing, your hurting everyone.” Now I want to know where I physically touched that person. I want to know how I’m twisting anyone’s arms to read this. I have never done anything of the sort in any way, shape or form and I DO NOT appreciate being accused of that!
ZeldaQueen: This chick has no sense of irony or metaphors. Interesting.
If you’re emotionally hurt over this, its your fault not mine. I’m sorry if it did, but I have placed several warnings describing the content of this story and if you know what it contains and you do not like this type of material, then why are you reading it?
ZeldaQueen: My dear, the emotional hurt isn't coming from the sex and blood (although that certainly doesn't help), it's coming from how you've mangled a beloved fandom and it's characters almost fully beyond recognition!!!
I do not appreciate getting accused for other people’s actions. It is your choice as the reader to read the content of this story and it is not my fault if it upsets you when you knew from the gecko what it contained.
ZeldaQueen: "Gecko"?!?!? Okay, we haven't even started the story and this is getting ridiculous. Honestly, how do you mistake "gecko" with "get-go"?
So please DO NOT flame me about it.
I also feel like a schoolteacher teaching a bunch of little kids. And I find that this really wasn’t necessary and shouldn’t have had to come to this, but it is very hard when your reviewers have forgotten how to conduct themselves like adults.
ZeldaQueen: Again, why do you assume that none of these flamers are kids?
If you honestly think that being malicious is a good thing and that you’re not wrong in doing so, well then your blinded by your own selfish pride. People with common sense learn how to take responsibility for themselves and are able to admit when their wrong. I have found that many of the reviewers that have left me malicious reviews honestly believe that its appropriate behavior for an adult. When it really is that they are too self-absorbed in themselves to admit their wrong. Again that results from selfish pride. One to scared to admit in front of others that they just might be wrong. Also, how can any of you hold any right to call Jenna conceited when in reality, your contradicting yourself by being conceited as well? Being conceited is again selfish pride and being self-absorbed. And yes, it is and always will be a fact that most of the reviewers have been conceited and very contradictive. Please DO NOT leave me a review that only contradicts what you are trying to preach. You should in reality, take your own advice.
ZeldaQueen: *pulls at hair* Start the fic already!
And I can see how a flame review is rude or nasty, but how is it "conceited"? Especially when it points out your shortcomings?
Again I find it very ridiculous that this had to be as long as it is,
ZeldaQueen: So do I.
but it is due to the fact that people not conducting themselves appropriately. Also if I do receive any more malicious reviews, with screaming, spitting nails or ranting and raving over this story because you do not like it then are to self-absorbed to admit that acting like that is wrong, well then you have proven my point! All of this is very self-explanatory!
ZeldaQueen: Now I'm getting shades of Allecto, "If you insult me, you're only insulting yourself!"
Now PLEASE DO NOT READ ON if you DO NOT plan on leaving me a review appropriately!
ZeldaQueen: You've said that a zillion times before, and if people were going to leave they'd have left by now!
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ZeldaQueen: And that, gentle viewers, was just the author's notes. Next update, we shall get the actual content. Please bring pillows so you don't hurt yourself when headdesking.
Onward to: Prologue
Back to: Table of Contents
ZeldaQueen: Sure. *to viewers* All right everyone, strap in for a wild ride! This is My Inner Life, otherwise known as the My Immortal of the Legend of Zelda fandom. It's got it all - blatant Sue favorism, character derailment, the works! And to cap it all off this might be the worst Suethor in existence. Why? Well, while Gethsemane Butler, Stephenie Meyer, and Keiran Halcyon all wish that their fanfictions really happened, our Suethor - Link's Queen (very subtle) - actually does believe it. She honestly believes that the events of this fanfiction have happened to her. But hey, don't take my word for it. Let's hear from the nut herself!
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
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Author's Notes
Hello. Thanks for choosing to read my story. As you might know I have become a major Zelda fan in the last year. Ever since I played OoT I have grown a fond interest in Link.
ZeldaQueen: "A fond interest"? Is that what they're calling it now?
I started to notice that after I got really into it, I found that I have a strange gift. A gift to Lucid Dream.
ZeldaQueen: You know, lucid dreams aren't that rare. They sort of are, but you're certainly not the only person to have them. Wikipedia even gives tips on how to have them. Jesus, just started the author's notes and she's trying to Sue herself.
I started having dreams about Hyrule, and about Link.
ZeldaQueen: Given what happens in some of these dreams, I seriously have to wonder how old you are. Are you at the age when you get those dreams?
In a Lucid Dream you can control your dreams. The dreams became very real, kinda like a second life, and almost every night I would have another. Starting from where the last left off.
ZeldaQueen: Your sentences are really choppy, by the way. Did you really need to make "starting from where the last left off" it's own sentence?
Even to this day I still have them.
ZeldaQueen: Which has been how long? If you've been having perfectly continuous dreams for so long, you ought to seek therapy or something.
I find that they help me get through life. I know this may sound queer,
ZeldaQueen: *giggle snort*
but for me the dreams sure help me out.
ZeldaQueen: Um, you just said that. And how wonderful, the only thing that keeps you going through life is some wet dreams over a video game character. Sounds like you really do need therapy.
I have shared this story with many other people and so far all has liked it.
ZeldaQueen: No offense, but I'm pretty sure your goldfish don't have that broad of a criteria for judging fanfiction.
Now as you read this it is told from my perspective or first person view.
ZeldaQueen: So she's right here and now admitting straight out that her character's a self insert. Well, at least she's honest.
You will find that it is very detailed since I remember it all very clearly to this day.
ZeldaQueen: After the millionth description of your wardrobe, I can believe it. I still can't believe this is healthy.
The story takes place after OoT. Nothing after that ever happens. No Majora's Mask. No LttP, or even Oracle of Ages and Seasons. And there is no love relation between Link and Zelda, Link and Ruto, Link and Malon or Link and Saria.
ZeldaQueen: Because all of those games deal with Link going to other places, which would mean that he couldn't hang around and have hot tiger sex with your Mary Sue insert. Same with those poor girls. Yes, I'm angry about that. I know full well what you did to them all.
Because of my feelings about Link, the person that he gets involved with in this story is myself or actually is my persona.
ZeldaQueen: Gah, she's fully admitting that he's only with her because she wants it!
A persona is for those of you who need to know, a representation of ones personality, or in dictionary terms is, (Persona) n. In biology, same as person. So for all you future readers, this story is based on Jenna, a char that is a representation of my personality.
ZeldaQueen: Actually according to Jung, one's persona was their public facade, not who they really were inside. Phail.
But if you think this might be too queer then you shouldn't read this. THIS IS NOT THE TYPE OF STORY FOR THOSE OF YOU THAT DISLIKE, OR CANNOT HANDLE SUCH MATERAL AS THE CONTEXT OF THIS STORY.
ZeldaQueen: Caplocks ahoy! And stop using the word "queer". It's creepy.
But if you seriously believe you can handle the content of this story, then read on. If your squeamish about sex, then you should not read this, since this story is a REAL LEMON and there is a lot of that, heavily detailed.
ZeldaQueen: My dear, have you ever heard of Hogwarts Exposed? Or The Girl Who Lived? Now that was an awful sex-bonding. I personally think your fic is a lemon in that it leaves a sour taste in my mouth and occasionally causes burning pains.
And again, I find it rather disgusting and disturbing that you are able to recall, in such vivid detail, having sex with a video game character.
(Between Link and I that is)
ZeldaQueen: Because you are the only two that matter.
Especially during the bonding ceremony. There is also some blood content and strong adult language. So if that’s too much then you should turn back now.
ZeldaQueen: Please. This is the internet. You just ensured that every smart aleck for miles will be reading and flaming.
Now I have not finished it as of yet.
ZeldaQueen: Thank God.
I have to catch up, since the last dream I had was just after Link and I had the blessing ceremony for our twins.(Our 3rd and 4th kids) Right now there is about 100-150 pgs worth. I'm expecting it to reach at least 300-350 probably even more. I will try to up date as often as possible.
ZeldaQueen: Good God, four kids? And you're how old when you dreamed this?
I hope that some of you like this.
ZeldaQueen: I don't.
I do not mind sharing it.
ZeldaQueen: Given what you're about to say, I find that laughable.
But please understand that this is very PRECIOUS to me, as well as Link.
ZeldaQueen: Precious to Link? HE'S NOT REAL! He won't know you even wrote this thing! Your dream Link isn't real either!
So like I said, if the content of this story sounds, too queer to you, TURN BACK NOW! But to all who wish to continue, happy reading. Thanks,
ZeldaQueen: You're not welcome
~*~ Link’s Queen ~*~
ZeldaQueen: Is a whore
Rated R for strong adult language, sex, violence and blood content.
ZeldaQueen: I should hope so.
And strap in. Caplocks rage, full throttle.
AGAIN AS A FINAL WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS HEAVY SEX, ABULT LANGUAGE AND TALKS ABOUT MY PERSONAL ENCOUNTER WITH LINK. THIS STORY IS BASED ON DREAMS, DREAMS ABOUT MY LIFE WITH HIM. IF YOU FIND THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY TO BE OFFENSEVE, QUEER, OR PLAIN OUT OFF THE WALL, THEN DO NOT READ ON!!!!!!!
ZeldaQueen: Woah there, did your Prozac just wear off? And you already told us this stuff! If people didn't listen to it before, then repeating it in caplocks won't help!
I HAVE GOTTEN WAY TO MANY FLAMES ABOUT THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY WHEN I HAVE PLACED SEVERAL WARNINGS!!!!
ZeldaQueen: Flames are never good, but my dear, few if any fans appreciate canon rape, especially to your degree.
I WILL NOT ACCECPT ANY MORE FLAMES, RAMBLINGS, CUSSING OR EXCESSIVE LASHING OUT ABOUT THE CHAR JENNA, OR REVIEWS ABOUT THE CONTENT OF THIS STORY, EXCESSIVE LASHING OUT, VICIOUS ATTACKS AGAINST MY PERSONALITY, OR NON-MATURE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISIM!!!
ZeldaQueen: (Author) "In other words, only praise! Heap it on, get to it!"
ANY REVIEWS SUBMITTED THAT DO NOT FOLLOW THE ABOUVE GUIDLINES, WILL BE DELETED IMMEDIATELY!
ZeldaQueen: That rarely goes well. And "abouve"? Is that the phonetic Canadian version of "above"?
THESE WARNINGS ARE NOT THERE TO LOOK PRETTY,
ZeldaQueen: Good. They don't.
THE AUTHORS PLACE WARNINGS FOR A REASON!!!
ZeldaQueen: Yeah, and insane Suethors put capslocks warnings to look like twats.
IT IS TO TELL YOU WHAT THE CONTENT OF THE STORY IS SO THAT IF THE READER FINDS THE CONTENT OF THE STORY OFFENSIVE, THEY WILL NOT READ ON!!! MANY AUTHORS HAVE BEEN COMPLAINING ABOUT UNWANTED, EXCESSIVE, VIOLENT AND JUST PLAIN NASTY REVIEWS THAT HAVE BEEN SUBMITTED BY READERS ABOUT THEIR STORIES, CAUSING FANFICTION TO GRANT AUTHORS THE ABILITY TO DELETE UNWANTED REVIEWS AND BLOCK CERTAIN READERS!! I WILL SAY THIS FOR MYSELF AND FOR ALL AUTHORS ON FANFICTION. NO AUTHOR TWISTS YOUR ARM OR HOLDS YOU AT GUN POINT OR FORCES YOU IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM TO READ THEIR STORIES!! ALL READERS HAVE THE RIGHT NOT TO READ A CERTAIN STORY!!! IT IS YOUR RESOPONSIBILITY TO READ THE WARNINGS AND DECIDE FOR YOUSELF IF THE CONTENT OF THE STORY IS OFFENSIVE TO YOU, AND TO MAKE THE CHOICE TO READ ON OR NOT!!!
ZeldaQueen: Yadda, yadda, yadda, will you get on with it?
AND IT ALSO IS THE READERS RESPONSIBILITY TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY ON HOW THEY HANDLE THENSELVES WHEN LEAVING A REVIEW FOR AN AUTHOR!!
ZeldaQueen: "Responsibility to take responsibility"? Now that's just stupid.
LEAVING A REVIEW THAT IS VIOLENT IN NATURE ONLY MAKES YOU THE READER LOOK BAD, AND IS VERY IMMATURE.
ZeldaQueen: Says the lady giving the CAPSLOCKS OF RAGE
IF ALL US HERE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE ADULTS, WELL THEN, LETS CONDUCTIVE OURSELVES LIKE ADULTS AND NOT LIKE LITTLE KIDS!
ZeldaQueen: So can I safely assume that you're a little kid then?
I ONLY EXPECT THE VIOLENT LASHING OUT AND VICIOUS ATTACKS TO COME FROM TEENANGERS, NOT ADULTS!
ZeldaQueen: Because it's only teenagers who are violent. No adults who act in inappropriate ways.
IF YOU PEOPLE REALLY ARE ADULTS THAT ARE CONDUCTING YOURSELVES IN THE MANORS I DECRIBED ABOVE, YOU PEOPLE REALLY ARE SCARING ME!
ZeldaQueen: And your spelling is starting to scare me. But don't worry, I'll conduct myself in the manor you decribed. Now where are my serfs and the baby's bed I must take apart?
IT’S A DAMN SHAME TO KNOW THAT THERE ARE ADULTS OUT THERE WHO CANNOT CONDUCTIVE THEMSELVES IN THE SIMPLEST MANORS THEIR PARENTS HAVE TAUGHT THEM!
ZeldaQueen: There you go again! It's not the Feudal Era dear, we don't really use manors anymore. And did it ever occur to you that reviewers act like teenagers (as you put it) because they are teenagers? Not everyone on FF.net is an adult you know.
ALSO LEAVING MALICIOUS REVIEWS IS ALSO A SIGN OF LOW SELF-ESTEEM. IF ALL YOU PEOPLE KNOW HOW DO IS ATTACK SOMEONE VICIOUSLY, IT’S A SIGN OF SELFISHNESS AND NO RESPECT FOR ONES-SELF!
ZeldaQueen: Now this is just sounding like a lame attempt to fight back. "Yeah, you don't have any friends because you're just a mean old bully! Nyah!"
I SUGGEST TO ALL READERS WHO ARE THINKING ABOUT LEAVING A MALICIOUS REVIEW FOR ME, PLEASE GET A HOBBY AND LEARN TO CONTROL YOUR ANGER, BECAUSE YOUR ONLY HURTING YOURSELF, NOT ME! ALSO LEAVING A NASTY REVIEW ONLY MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID, NOT ME!
ZeldaQueen: LQ, please stop going on about people looking stupid and controlling anger. The irony is eating me alive. I might also add that you are the one writing a story out of your life-saving wet dreams, so you're hardly one to give advice on hobbies.
I FIND IT VERY RIDICULOUS THAT I HAD TO LEAVE A WARNING THIS LONG, BUT IT IS BECAUSE OF THE VERY IMMATURE READERS THAT HAVE SUBMITTED NASTY CHILDISH REVIEWS!
ZeldaQueen: I agree, that was ridiculous.
AGAIN, PLEASE READ THE ABOVE CONTEXT BEFORE READING ON!!!!
ZeldaQueen: No, once is enough for me.
Furthermore, I have realized that this story needs some heavy grammar corrections, and that the plot needs some work.
ZeldaQueen: Oh God, does it! The plot needs "some work" like a 9/11 conspiracy theorist needs "some brains"
Also under the advisement of my friend who had just recently completed two literature classes, has stated the reasons why people had classified Jenna as a “Mary Sue” char and labeled her as “flat”.
ZeldaQueen: I don't think you need two literature classes to figure that out, darling.
She has come to the conclusion that most people do not know or understand Jenna’s history, so she has advised me to create an origin story to explain about her history before she met Link. That way she will become more rounded and give people a reason to care about her.
ZeldaQueen: At the risk of spoiling things for the viewers, we never really get a backstory anyway. So nice of Link's Queen to take constructive criticism into account.
It was never in my intentions to create Jenna as a “Mary Sue” char or to make her conceited, because I’m not really like that.
ZeldaQueen: "Not really like that"? Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!! Right, and Keiran Halcyon never meant to make Rose Potter a Mary Sue because she's so much better than Harry!
Jenna is a persona char, one that resembles my personality while this story is being told from her perspective.
ZeldaQueen: If she represents you and she's conceited, then that kind of implies that you are conceited also. Or a really bad writer.
Good gravy, I'm getting Twilight flashbacks here!
This story is not something that I pulled out of my head like my drawings, it came from my dreams.
ZeldaQueen: As you've told us five billion times by now.
So I understand that revising this story is going to be hard work and will take time.
ZeldaQueen: Why didn't you make these revisions before posting this fanfiction online? You could have spared us this rant.
Since this story is being told in the exact, or close to exact order it happened in the dreams, changing how fast Link and Jenna marry isn’t going to be easy. Even changing how fast they have sex and revising the Lemon parts also won’t be so easy to do.
ZeldaQueen: Huh, looks like the Suethor's found the ultimate excuse for her bad writing. "It's not my fault it all happened unrealistically! That's how it happened in the dream! I was just writing how it happened!"
Wait a second, Stephenie Meyer wrote Twilight as per her own dream dictated...
I just went cold.
But I’m currently in the process of revising this story, also I have received a college grammar book from my friend and I will be investing in a Beta-Reader.
ZeldaQueen: How about Microsoft Word's spell check and grammar check features? And beta-readers are usually free, aren't they?
I’m also considering taking to literature classes at JC to help boost my writing skills. But now I say this, if you people, the reviewers really have the intentions to help me, them please do it positively and like a mature adult. I’m telling you that it is a proven fact that negative motivation NEVER motivates someone to change. It never has and it never will. I’m pretty sure your parents have taught you that people only respond to positive motivation and not negative.
ZeldaQueen: I applaud her for her apparent willingness to accept constructive criticism, but the sheer fail of this fic makes me dock her any earned points.
I’m not close-minded, I NEVER have been.
ZeldaQueen: Pfftt!!!
I have always been open to other people’s thoughts and opinions, its when its done in an inappropriate manner that I turn my nose at it and look away. People have to understand that when you’re an adult, you need to conduct yourself like one and learn how to address other people like one. You cannot just act childish when you come across something that you DO NOT approve of, you’re only making yourself look bad and that can affect you later on in life. Acting childish and ranting and raving is something I’d expect a little kid would do when he doesn’t get his way. When an adult acts childish over stupid things, that’s looked down upon, and considered to be unhealthy. I have seen far too many reviews left for me where the reviewers are just ranting and raving like little kids over this story because they do not like it. It is only making them look stupid and is very unhealthy. I fear that these people have some serious emotional problems if they get that upset over a story. People in control of their emotions and have also obtained some sort of common sense, NEVER let little things get them all riled up. It is very sad when one that is supposed to be an adult, cannot handle them like one. I was NEVER angry with the reviewers not liking the story, it’s how they handled themselves when leaving me the reviews. Getting riled up, ranting and raving, screaming and spitting nails over this story is what has caused me to get upset, not the fact that they didn’t like it.
ZeldaQueen: Glad to hear all of that. Now are we actually going to get this story now?
Also as a side note, I NEVER physically hurt ANYONE with this story.
ZeldaQueen: Apparently not.
I got one reviewer that said. “Oh God please stop writing, your hurting everyone.” Now I want to know where I physically touched that person. I want to know how I’m twisting anyone’s arms to read this. I have never done anything of the sort in any way, shape or form and I DO NOT appreciate being accused of that!
ZeldaQueen: This chick has no sense of irony or metaphors. Interesting.
If you’re emotionally hurt over this, its your fault not mine. I’m sorry if it did, but I have placed several warnings describing the content of this story and if you know what it contains and you do not like this type of material, then why are you reading it?
ZeldaQueen: My dear, the emotional hurt isn't coming from the sex and blood (although that certainly doesn't help), it's coming from how you've mangled a beloved fandom and it's characters almost fully beyond recognition!!!
I do not appreciate getting accused for other people’s actions. It is your choice as the reader to read the content of this story and it is not my fault if it upsets you when you knew from the gecko what it contained.
ZeldaQueen: "Gecko"?!?!? Okay, we haven't even started the story and this is getting ridiculous. Honestly, how do you mistake "gecko" with "get-go"?
So please DO NOT flame me about it.
I also feel like a schoolteacher teaching a bunch of little kids. And I find that this really wasn’t necessary and shouldn’t have had to come to this, but it is very hard when your reviewers have forgotten how to conduct themselves like adults.
ZeldaQueen: Again, why do you assume that none of these flamers are kids?
If you honestly think that being malicious is a good thing and that you’re not wrong in doing so, well then your blinded by your own selfish pride. People with common sense learn how to take responsibility for themselves and are able to admit when their wrong. I have found that many of the reviewers that have left me malicious reviews honestly believe that its appropriate behavior for an adult. When it really is that they are too self-absorbed in themselves to admit their wrong. Again that results from selfish pride. One to scared to admit in front of others that they just might be wrong. Also, how can any of you hold any right to call Jenna conceited when in reality, your contradicting yourself by being conceited as well? Being conceited is again selfish pride and being self-absorbed. And yes, it is and always will be a fact that most of the reviewers have been conceited and very contradictive. Please DO NOT leave me a review that only contradicts what you are trying to preach. You should in reality, take your own advice.
ZeldaQueen: *pulls at hair* Start the fic already!
And I can see how a flame review is rude or nasty, but how is it "conceited"? Especially when it points out your shortcomings?
Again I find it very ridiculous that this had to be as long as it is,
ZeldaQueen: So do I.
but it is due to the fact that people not conducting themselves appropriately. Also if I do receive any more malicious reviews, with screaming, spitting nails or ranting and raving over this story because you do not like it then are to self-absorbed to admit that acting like that is wrong, well then you have proven my point! All of this is very self-explanatory!
ZeldaQueen: Now I'm getting shades of Allecto, "If you insult me, you're only insulting yourself!"
Now PLEASE DO NOT READ ON if you DO NOT plan on leaving me a review appropriately!
ZeldaQueen: You've said that a zillion times before, and if people were going to leave they'd have left by now!
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ZeldaQueen: And that, gentle viewers, was just the author's notes. Next update, we shall get the actual content. Please bring pillows so you don't hurt yourself when headdesking.
Onward to: Prologue
Back to: Table of Contents