Marked: Chapter 13

Feb 17, 2011 22:06

ZeldaQueen: In which there is character bashing and very little else

Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
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Chapter 13

ZeldaQueen: Zoey goes running off to her Literature class, where Stevie Rae and Damien are waiting. Seeing as they're already her groupies and their lives revolve around her, they start calling her over and being all happy she's there. Stevie Rae is explicitly compared to an excited puppy and immediately starts bombarding Zoey with questions about her Drama class. Zoey brings up that she was a bit distracted in the class, and starts to tell them about Erik. She pauses and Damien gets all gossipy, giving us "'I feel a juicy tidbit coming on. Come on, Zoey. You were distracted becauuuuse?' He drew the word out into a question". Earth to Ms and Ms Cast - you do not need to tell us that he drew "becauuuuse" into a question. We know it's a question because of the GODDAMMED QUESTION MARK!

I am sorry.

Anyway, she name drops Erik and Stevie Rae's mouth hangs open and Damien actually pretends to swoon. Yeah, get used to this, folks. Erik's hotness is literally all Zoey's friends ever talk about. And unlike Twilight, we don't even really get Zoey telling them off for it, so it's not like we're supposed to be thinking that there's more to him in the relationship or anything. It's very depressing.

Sorry, tangent. So yeah, their conversation is cut off as class starts, and Zoey is pleased because "If nothing else I was sure that I would love the fact that mentioning Erik would drive them crazy all hour". Because teenagers do nothing but gossip and giggle over hot boys and Zoey's brief encounter with one is just sooooo important. *is grumpy*

So, on to the class itself! We're once again told how this is all So Much Better than normal Lit classes, starting with "bizarrely interesting posters and paintings and what looked like original art work filling every inch of wall space". We're then told how the teacher has hazel eyes and reddish-blond hair, and I really wonder if one of the Suethors has some sort of obsession with blond-ish hair coloring. Because really, this has got to be the third one mentioned, and I'm pretty sure that there's more. Oh, and reddish-blond hair is so attractive, you say? *whistles innocently and plays back to previous chapter sporking*

"Her hair was deep red-not that horrid carrottop orange-red or the washed-out blond-red, but a dark, glossy auburn that fell in heavy waves well past her shoulders"

ZeldaQueen: Any time the Suethors feel like being consistent will be fine. Oh, and we're told that the teacher has "a curvy body that probably made all the guys drool", to which Zoey adds "not that it's very hard to make teenage boys drool". Okay, is she supposed to secretly be five or something? Because this "boys are icky cootie-heads" attitude is really annoying me.

Right, one more thing - the teacher's name is Professor Penthesilea, which was the name of an Amazon queen who fought in the Trojan war, was killed by Achilles, and was only mourned by him because he thought she was hot and he wanted to marry her. Yeah. I feel I ought to bring this up, Zoey seems perfectly peachy with her name choice, even though she ridiculed Aphrodite and Thor for choosing names that had "delusions of grandeur". What, naming oneself after an Amazon Queen" theoretically isn't a sign of delusions of grandeur as well? Bull, I say!

By now, the Suethors have apparently thought that they've ignored My Immortal for too long, so we get a far too detailed description of Professor Penthesilea's Mark (like a Celtic knot) and clothes. Zoey notes that the professor has the same symbol of Nyx on her shirt that Neferet and the Drama teacher had, and makes a big show of noting how odd that is. Two points here. First of all, they're teachers. Why would it be odd that they're all wearing the same symbols? Second of all, nothing comes of it in the story. Really.

Professor Penthesilea opens her lecture by saying how she was born in 1902, which grabs Zoey's attention because she looks younger than thirty so of course it's amazing that someone's really that old, tch yeah. Anyway, the professor goes on to say how she was ten years old in 1912, so she can clearly remember the tragedy that took place that year. She asks if anyone knows what she's talking about. And what do you know, Zoey just happens to know the answer, as she's a gigantic Titanic fan and totally had the hots for Leonardo DiCaprio when she was younger! Oh yeah, she acts like knowing about the sinking of the Titanic just because one likes to know about history makes one a nerd. Right, as opposed to knowing about it because of James Cameron.

So she answers the question correctly and Stevie Rae and Damien are all SHOCK AND AWE over this, and Zoey is mildly insulted that they apparently thought she was so stupid that she couldn't answer that. No comment. Professor Penthesilea meanwhile is gushing over how nice it is when "a new fledgling knows something", because clearly human schools are useless places that teach children nothing of any value.

It's announced that they're going to be studying the book A Night to Remember next, and the Cast ladies apparently decided to add a bit of Meyer to the mix, because Professor Penthesilea describes the Titanic sinking as "deliciously melodramatic" and considers it a waste that the author, Walter Lord, wasn't a vampire. Go screw yourselves.

Once again, Zoey starts gushing over how fascinating this is, compared to her reading list at her old high school, which apparently included Great Expectations. Ten bucks says that Kristen didn't like that book when she was in school.

Zoey's gushing is interrupted as she notices a redheaded kid who's asleep. And it's pretty apparent that we're not supposed to like him, because he's described as having a "way-too-white-and-freckled face", unattractive hair, and is drooling in his sleep. At the end of class, Professor Penthesilea confronts the kid, who we find is named Elliot, and starts reminding him that he's failing Lit but also failing life and vampire males are the warriors and protectors, blah, blah, blah, and how can he expect to turn into a warrior if he can't stay awake in class? She tells Elliot that he can write a paper for extra credit, and he basically says he's not going to do it. The teacher starts to pull the "you're also letting your mentor down" card, and Elliot says his mentor knows what he's like, and starts picking his nose. Yes, the Cast ladies really are sparing no expense to show us how unlikable this guy is.

At this point the bell rings and Elliot goes racing for the door. Of course, he crashes into Damien on the way out and says to him "Fucking faggot, get outta my way". I do wonder if "subtlety" means anything to these Suethors. Zoey declares that he has "poopie for brains", which just reinforces my theory that she's actually five. Seriously, who says "poopie"? I don't even say that, and my friends think my avoidance of swearing in real life is hilarious!

And...that's pretty much where the chapter ends, with them all going off to fencing.

WHY DOES NOTHING HAPPEN IN THESE CHAPTERS??? WHY???

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Onward to: Chapter 14

Back to: Chapter 12

Back to:  Table of Contents

suethor: kristin cast, chapter 13, fic: marked, book 1, series: house of night, suethor: pc cast

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