This is not my life. My life has not begun. This is warm ups, practice for the real thing, try-outs to see if I can make it, if I'm good enough. You know what I am good enough. Nothing can bring me down, I will continue to overcome. I will continue to smile. What's a little stress compared to tearing your skin open night after night because ( Read more... )

I'm not here. I'm not Christina Parker.I'm not here. I'm not Christina Parker.I'm not here. I'm not Christina Parker.I'm not here. I'm not Christina Parker.I'm not here. I'm not Christina Parker.I'm not here. I'm not Christina Parker.I'm not here. I'm not Christina Parker.I'm not here. I'm not Christina Parker.I'm not here. Tell yourself ( Read more... )

So I just saw the movie Fame right? You'd think that a happy, cheery, positive movie would put me in that kind of mood, like it used to right? But here's the problem, I've gotten older, more time has passed. I don't have time to do anything else with my life. What have I done, what am I doing? Going to a 4-year university to be a Linguistic ( Read more... )

My wonderous land turned into a chaotic nightmare and I just want to wake up in a river bed of flowers with Jasmine by my side. Sometimes people get what they wish for and realize they're a fool for wishing for it. Imaginations get the best of people. When it concerns with matters of the heart, we're all fools, fools in love, fools falling out ( Read more... )

When did I get so old? Its my last few months as a teenager and I can tell. I'm already thinking about professional careers, where I might have to move for my job, what would be best for my finacial security. Like purchasing a car now while I don't have many bills and could pay it off quickly, so when I get settled someplace I can buy a house. ( Read more... )

This year I've decided I need plans, goals, stuff to keep me on track. I need something to accomplish, something to look forward to. I need something. I need determination, instead of procrastination, I need to stop taking my schooling and life for granted and be the best I can. Ok goals, here they are ( Read more... )

.................died.

Jasmine. My kitty cat. Died. Unexpectedly. While I'm away at camp. yeah.......

Its weird being home now and only having one cat around. Its kinda sad. I don't have Jasmine coming over to sit with me. Its weird not having her sleep with me. I don't like it. That's basically it.

is normally my refuge but this year its like a battlefield for my heart and soul. Its so hard this year, I fight everyday not to let myself be brought down. Oh memories.....sad day.

This is not what I intended. I've lost control of everything including my dreams. A nightmare for me isn't seeing friends die or an axe murderer chasing me, its a subtle type of murder, one that kills your soul but not your body. You shouldn't have to live through something like that, but you do. And that's the worst.

I'm worse.
I'm losing my ( Read more... )

So much not said...