i may be afraid of heights but i think i can stay up here as long as i dont look down ( Read more... )

someday im going to be a good writer.

because its all ive ever really wanted.

i had a breakdown today in the middle of friday commuter traffic on the five. i just started bawling in my car. im so exhausted and ive got no way out ( Read more... )

august 26-saw cat power live, tiny venue (malibu community arts center). chan marshall by herself. no back up band. she was ridiculously amazing. played OLD songs. including in this hole and moonshiner. she was funny. and awkward. and wonderful. my hero ( Read more... )

i got in. duh. january 2007 move to san francisco ( Read more... )

i need to feel close to someone. i need an actual relationship with an actual person who is not someone who is going to fly in and out of my life never to return i need some god damn consisitency. but here i am talking about picking up and moving in less than 6months ( Read more... )

ive never been so emotional in my life. ive never just spontaneously started crying like this before, at least not this often. i have got to balance out a little soon, i think i will...this is just the transitional period. i am smart and well adjusted and a big girl now and i know i can handle this. i just need to get myself over the initial shock ( Read more... )

so here i am in this new bedroom, in this house ive taken up residency in. im alone in a way ive never been before. its a sort of optimistic loneliness, because ive yet to try to meet anyone... its not like at home where youre alone because youve met everyone and they all let you down in one way or another, no one has let me down here yet. i havent ( Read more... )

what do you say in a moment like this. when everything is up in the air and your future could be anywhere, around any given corner you could get hit by a truck or meet the love of your life, on any given day everything or nothing could happen, i want to be in control of that. i want to feel like i have some say in what happens to me in my life, but ( Read more... )

when ive got one eye on a van gogh and the other holding steady on the phone ( Read more... )