there are two points in life almost everyone seems to reach. the first is the realization that you're more intelligent and/or gifted than your parents are, or ever could be. and the second is the apprehension that you've experienced the complete gamut of human emotion. once these two realizations are met, there really is no point in living any ( Read more... )

i'll write this entry later. world lit. calls...

shoot me.
.. please?

so my mother, the fool that she is, picks me up from school today and says "the video conference got rescheduled. now its in seattle, and even earlier. so i either have to drop you off at your dads no later than 6am or i have to just drop you off on my way home." so i told her, "okay, fine, just take me to dads ( Read more... )

today... was not a good day. i give up, i just. give. up. i'm just really tired of this. everything feels so ersatz, and i know its not, i know what i'm doing. i know that everything's in my head. but these days i seem to associate any sort of contentment with deception ( Read more... )

everyone is searching for some ideal, a quixotic existence, a life worthy of syndication. whether it's a torrid romance, a "happily ever after" ending, or a tragic demise, there are never any regrets. but no one ever thinks about what happens after the writer stops writing, the cameras stop filming, the lights are dimmed, and the journey is over ( Read more... )

okay, my mom is really really getting on my nerves. get a fucking job already, and leave me the hell alone. god, what a stupid bitch. i mean honestly, i shouldn't be complaining. but our house is like [ ] <-- that big, and she's here almost all the time. its so annoying. i'd retreat to my room, but i dont have a tv, or phone, or internet ( Read more... )

its depressing sometimes, when i think that no one can be who they really are...  to the extent of their complete "being" or whatever.  because outside influences crush you, and put you in different boxes, without your permission.  and you cant fight it.  you cant fight what people are thinking, and not saying.  and even if they say it, you cant ( Read more... )

haha, yeah. so i left Madame Bovary in my locker... that journal is due on monday right? oops. such a great start, to what i'm sure, will be the best year of my life.

orientation. yay, OR NOT... haha, clever. i actually think this was probably my favorite (out of the three i've been to), which doesn't mean i enjoyed it because i didn't. but i wasn't uncomfortable, for the most part everyone left me alone, i didn't break or sprain anything, and i remembered to take my cd player (and extra batteries) with me ( Read more... )

walking through those doors again... its like everything just came back, the indifference, the platitudes, the acerbity. last year, i almost thought annie wright was the real source of my despondency. but eventually, dissmissing that idea, i came to the conclusion it was just me. i was being stupid, juvenile, naive, angsty, a paradigm of ( Read more... )