sometimes i want something bad to happen to me. i will be walking down the street and hope that maybe a car won't see me and maybe just hit me. I think of the reactions of my friends and then of my family. will they cry? or will they blame me for not being careful? sometimes i want something bad to happen so then i wont have to deal with anything. ( Read more... )

im getting really annoyed with tweets, status updates, and journal entries talking about Haters. okay, we get it, youre not a well-liked human being. get over it. theres more to life than crying over what someone thinks about you. because if i was still that 10 year old chubby child who cried everytime my dad told me how horrible i was at something ( Read more... )

but really,

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what is so special about Taylor Swift? Ok, cool she writes her own music, but the lyrics are so juvenile and reminds me of 5th grade or something. i just dont get this whole craze and how she got so famous.

the past 5 years have been too much drama. after my 10th grade year, everything just started speeding up and got worse and worse. i guess thats life. im so thankful because it really has made me a smarter and stronger person. im no longer that same 15 year old who hasn't really seen much. there is so much more id like to see! there are times when i ( Read more... )

ok due to procrastination, i decided to answer a survey that i did in 2007. lets see whats changed!

( survey now and then )

"Vanessa, you were really nice..." my mom said to me, "...and then you got your period." when i was 15, my mom told me these words that are forever hammered into my head. something that was meant to be said jokingly, stuck with me for years. i was mean. thats all i ever knew. in high school, people would tell me i looked intimidating. i dont know ( Read more... )

no one will ever get it unless they have been in the same situation. the past couple of days have been rough. finding out my mom was sick again is just horrible. i have been crying every night. the hard part about it is that i havent even talked to my mom. i have no idea what i want to say to her. i want to just be home and be with my family. ( Read more... )

you know, its just so easy to pretend. i have been through a lot in my short 21 years alive. i always tell myself if i keep a positive attitude, ill learn to really love myself. for the most part, it works. but at home, nothing is ever all right ( Read more... )

this weekend was very eventful. i have so much to say and to list but im just not going to get into it. I guess I will tell a story ( Read more... )

i regret having something to say and not writing it doing because i was supposed to be asleep. last night my mind ran freely and i allowed it to. my imagination is so wonderful!