rabbiteatworld

i've got a really bad cold :/ and i (maybe stupidly) did pillZ on friday which lowers your immune system so that most likely didn't help. it was fun as fuck though.. my younger goth brother had his goth friends at our house, and they were doing pills aswell. they all came in my bedroom and had a cigarette & my dad went mental because we're not ( Read more... )

lots of people in the park are being whores and everyone hates hanna. it's all got way out of proportion, in my opinion. and people are just being fucking cruel. fucking pisses me off, because hanna doesn't deserve all this. my thumb is still numb and weird but it's kind of fun. it only looks like a little scratch anyway. i'm going over the idea of ( Read more... )

everything is so fucking difficult. but i went to a party on saturday and got FUCKED and fell down a near-vertical drop by the side of a road on the way home. si thought i was dead and he had to climb down and help me because i got my foot stuck under a gate. and apparently i kept speaking shit like; "simon,(very seriously) does that bit of grass ( Read more... )

i cannot stand this. if i was the right type of person, i'd have commited suicide last night. but i'm not. and i can't. i'm just going to keep living thru this stupid fucked up miserable life. i'm not saying i'm sad all the time. i have the most amazing happy moments and days and nights but it never adds up to a zillionth of the time i spend here. ( Read more... )

i HATE making mix CDs. completely. it is so fucking complicated. everything seems to end up in different formats and blahblahBLAH i hate it. unless i had money to buy decent converters and shtuff. i've been awake all night! *DAMN PROUD* i didn't know i could still do this. WOW WOW WOW it's 11:11. i don't think i've ever actually seen that yet. i ( Read more... )

today i feel paranoid, sad, regretful and bored. not as good as life should be. i know when the present is not worth living because i start obsessing over the past. from 3 years ago to 3 weeks ago.. and every mistake i made i'll go over and wish i could change. so i need to get something fucking going on NOW. anna is having a party in february.

today is good. because i feel incredible. even though someone* wasn't about, and i could've not bothered wearing a skirt and freezing to death. hahaaa. that sounds dumb. nevermind. miranda came down yesterday and we watched the little mirmaid and it was stormy outside. why do i feel like i can't say everything i want to say in here? her and shaz ( Read more... )

if only your number wasn't on the end of my fingers
i need to forget that the feel of you lingers
everywhere i go, everywhere i lay
waiting patiently for the day
that i wish isn't too far off
why the fuck are you part of
my world, my life, everything i do
it all comes back to being next to you.

in a place with no point. out of meaning. and people say you can give meaning to yourself. find a point to your life. but if you do, it's not real. it's in your head. there is no point, and there never really will be. and i can't get past that thought on to more important things. or less important. i feel like a ghost sometimes. i can't get this ( Read more... )