i'm so stupid...

god-fucking-damn, i wish i could just...idk.

I broke up with J for a day.

I think it sort of knocked some sense into him.

I'm not playing around, and now he knows that he's gotta take me and our relationship a little more seriously.

But it also knocked some sense into me.

It made me realize that I really really do want to be with him.

...yeah, that's all.

so lately, j has been talking about marriage...a lot ( Read more... )

so far, this year has been the greatest.
yeah, it's only been a month,
but the energy around me is so positive.

i'm doing what i love, and i have my boyfriend back.
i have the family and friends that are most important to me.

i mean, what else could i ask for (besides a fucking job)?

:)

yeah. me and j are back together. i'm not surprised. i talk a lot of shit sometimes. i was really upset with the whole situation. so of course i couldn't help myself ( Read more... )

hey.

boyfriend again.

lol.

i so shouldn't have done that.

...but i'm glad i did.

so it would seem that i'm caught in a predicament.

now that i kind of have j back, i don't know if i want him, fully.

not FOREVER, just not now.

i was liking the single life. and while i still am indeed single, i feel like there's too much attachment.

ugh.

i hate not being able to control myself and the things in my life ( Read more... )

i'm ruining my life, aren't i?

...eh. shit happens. i'll get over it. i always do.