the NF NT relationship

[wc_helmets]

There were many things about the NF/NT relationship I didn't understand until I saw the connection in various communities. I have a question, though? I always see the relationship brought up in terms of close friendship, close enough at times to rival an NF/NF frienship. However, where does this translate in romantic relationships

Comments

[caffron]

Actually, I've read that NTs and NFs do well together. My personal relationships have been unsuccessful with S types, and although I really don't like to use type for anything but self-improvement I must admit that it was the very S nature of those folks that ultimately I had trouble with. I have been attracted to NTs and NFs before but circumstances prevented anything coming from it. N's are alive in the mind and can be quite inspired in their own ways, and so I think NTs and NFs could relate romantically if they could bridge the gap that NTs sometimes put up by being a bit distant. In particular, a pair of Ns can enhance their relationships with romantic fantasy, a flair for symbolism and metaphor, to an extent an S may not be able to understand. Maybe its because I'm a mixed type myself, but I think at heart NTs and NFs are much less different from one another than other type combinations, especially if introverted.

[shawk]

I'm an INTJ and was roommates and friends with an INFJ for a number of years. There were of course problems (any two people are just going to have problems, obviously), but these were mostly avoided by simply skirting certain topics unless we both were feeling up to the mental clash of "it's true because it's meaningful" vs. "but logically..." Most of keeping away from the danger topics was on me because she appeared to have a need to have spirited arguments with people, which I don't.

I could see a romantic relationship between the two types working, there would just have to be some reflection on how problems were presented; "When you do this, it makes me feel like this" doesn't seem that much of a shift from, "You make me feel like this," but the logical approach makes all the difference to an NT. And the NT would probably have to work a bit on recognizing that an emotional response is valid. ;)

[urbeatle]

I think a lot of it has to do with how each person sees each of the four pairs.

for example, caffron above mentioned having problems with S people. I don't think I have a particular problem with S people, although I don't interact with them much... but I may have more problems with J people, because I'm more extreme on that scale, and I have a lot of clashes with E people, because that is my most extreme. someone closer to the center on a particular scale might have an easier time with those on the opposite side; I'm an INTP but my T is closer to the middle, and I seem to be OK with F people. I don't always catch what they are feeling (perhaps for other reasons,) but I don't dismiss emotion and meaning.

[agirlnamedlucky]

Good point. As an extreme N, I find it difficult to relate to S people, and I get the sense that they think me marginally insane. ;) And as a strong E, I tend to find introverts annoying in a 'why aren't you interacting?' sense.

Being more mild on the F/T and even more so on the P/J scale, I find any of these combinations fairly easy to deal with. Allowing for all of the above, however, I've also managed to maintain close friendships with ISTJs, despite my ENFp-ness.

[caffron]

Point quite valid. The individuals in question were SJ's but it was their S nature rather than J nature that got to me; even though my P is my strongest preference, N is still quite strong.

[agirlnamedlucky]

To answer the actual question - I actually find ENTPs and ENTJs (particularly) the former to be very attractive personality types, despite being an obvious NF.

NF NT romance...

[stareotype]

I agree that it depends on the strength of the preferences, because I'm a strongly expressed I and most S people I know can't understand me so I have to talk to them in thier own language. In romantic relationships I want to be with someone who I can be myself and communicate easily with. When I look back, I've had two relationships which lasted for more than 3 years, an ENFP and an INTJ. I'm an INFJ. So I think it's important to have alot in common. My relationships which didn't make it to 3 months were with two ISFPs and an ESFP. All of which took place before I learned about Jung.