I realized something just now...In my comment I left on Alexis' journal I put at the end 'I love you Alexis'. It was automatic, subconscious. I told her on Tuesday that I cared for her, but I wanted to save the word 'love' for when it meant more. Somehow, after talking to her on the phone every day, it became true ( Read more... )

Oh my GOD, I have NEVER been this happy in my LIFE. She is beautiful, wonderful, amazing...she makes me happy, sad, nervous, excited...and she wants to be mine. I'm sitting in her apartment right now typing this...I hope she doesn't get mad, but she headed off to bed and said I could stay the night...I don't think I'll be able to sleep. I am ( Read more... )

if I had to, I would wait all night for Alexis to come on AIM. I want to talk to her so badly, I just...OH MY GOD SHE JUST CAME ON THANK YOU GOD THANK YOU KARMA!

I am so sorry for the way I have been behaving. I'll admit it, I'm a coward. I have had a crush on you for a very long time and never had the confidence to deal with it. You are so beautiful, so kind, understanding...I always wondered what made you speak to me. The other night, I wanted so badly to get on and talk to you, but instead I was ( Read more... )

So my relationship with Alyssa is over. It ended quietly, with an understanding instead of a fight. Not nearly as painful as my relationship with Paula. I left Alexis a message asking her out. It was kind of silly, actually...I sang to her. I make such an ass out of myself sometimes. Anyway, We're friends so it's all good. (Nikki, if she ( Read more... )

It never occurred to me during the tour, but sometimes I was called the 'Next Latin Sensation'...I realized that I have been ignorning my roots, what got me here, that I am different and I enjoy being different. My name is Abner Juda Gil, my mother calls me Chula, and I am Mexican ( Read more... )

So...bought a paid account to cheer myself up...it's working :)..oh yeah and with the help of Tamyra who won't leave me alone until I'm smiling..now I just need some new icons!

I haven't felt like doing much of anything the last few weeks. My mom sent me a shrink (yay.) who seems to know about all my problems. She doesn't, obviously. How can you understand losing the most wonderful person in the world when it's not something you have ever been blessed with ( Read more... )

( For Paula )

It's been a rough couple of days. Paula has stuck by me every step of the way. With the tour, I haven't had to tell anyone in my family what happened. I don't want to...but since I'm a minor, the authorities might find it necessary to tell them. I don't want to see my mom cry ( Read more... )