FIC: KHR! - *Heroes not Included - Part II ~ Chapter 11
Title: *Heroes not Included
Part II: Abort, Retry, Fail
Fandom: Katekyo Hitman Reborn
Pairing: 1859 (established), 8059 (unrequited)
Genre: Humour, case fic, AU
Rating: PG-13 (applies to all chapters unless otherwise stated)
Word count: overall ~ 28,650 | Chapter 11: ~ 1,900
Chapters (click to jump to): 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11
Jump to Part I - No Replacements, No Refunds
Master post
~*~*~
~ Part II ~
Abort, Retry, Fail
Gokudera sat in his cell and stared at the opposite wall. There was a writing, a little to the left of the empty bunk: If only I knew what I was doing.
He'd read it countless times over the course of the last few hours and to this very moment he hadn't come up with an answer.
How this person had managed to smuggle in a sharpie was a mystery all by itself. But on second thought Gokudera really didn't want to know. From personal experience he could tell that the police were very thorough. They had stripped him of his entire gear, including his suit. Fortunately, not even the police were heartless enough to let him sit around naked. Or they didn't enjoy his bare butt as much as Hibari did. However their opinion on his physique, they had handed him a standard prisoners uniform in glaring yellow. It was the complete opposite of comfortable but still better than freezing his ass off.
He was considering leaving his own musings for future occupants of this cell when the door gave an automated click and rattled open. It revealed a police officer and a familiar dark-haired figure.
Gokudera smiled, a little relieved but not yet reassured. "I was beginning to think you wouldn't come."
Upon a nod from Hibari the policeman bustled off. The agent turned to eye Gokudera with a look that could mean anything from 'You are screwed' to 'I am your knight in a black suit. All hail me.'.
"I got your message," he said eventually, his tone as level as if he was reciting yesterday's news.
Gokudera nodded, cautious, "I was hoping you would."
Hibari tossed him a small key and pointed at the handcuffs still binding Gokudera's wrists. He didn't take his eyes off Gokudera.
"You fucked up," he stated after a while.
Gokudera stood up, holding out the handcuffs for Hibari to take. He offered a small, vaguely guilty smile along with them. "Yes. Yes, I did."
He hadn't really thought about what to expect. Gratitude? A punch in the face? With Hibari everything was possible.
The agent stood in the door, blocking Gokudera's way. He didn't look up but when he took the handcuffs he pulled Gokudera flush against him. Hibari's breath tickled his ear and before any of this could make sense there was the suggestion of lips against his skin.
Hibari didn't say thank you. But Gokudera knew the agent well enough to read not only between the lines but also from essentially blank pages. And his kisses were like ink blotches - up for interpretation.
He grinned. "So, does that mean we're good?"
Hibari silently held him close for another second or two which was an answer all by itself. Then he stepped back, assuming his official persona again. "The case is ruined. The main suspect has fled the country and important military research was set back months, if not years."
"Yeah, I figured as much." Gokudera snorted and hurried after Hibari as the agent determinedly stalked down the hall towards the exit.
"You will have to tell me exactly how you failed."
Gokudera stopped for a moment and blinked. "What for?"
Hibari threw him a glance over his shoulder. "I will have to put it in my report. I assume you tripped?"
When Gokudera didn't reply he nodded, a thin little smile on his face. "Yes. I think you tripped."
They hurried out of the police station, past rather intimidated officers and Gokudera couldn't hide his grin anymore. "Yeah, that was it. Tripped. Shame, really. Seems like I'm out of practice, after all."
Gokudera didn't miss the beginnings of a grin on Hibari's lips but they were quickly replaced by his usual business expression. Hibari led the way to his car, gesturing at Gokudera to get in.
He slid into the passenger seat and gave Hibari just enough time to get adjusted before blurting out: "What about my sister?"
Hibari seemingly ignored him and started the car.
"Hey," Gokudera grabbed the gear shifter and forced Hibari to pay him some goddamned attention, "I asked you a question, jerk."
Hibari's eyes narrowed as if he was weighing the benefits of a fight against the damage it would do to his car. Obviously, the car won. "She was released an hour ago. Turns out there was a terrible misunderstanding."
Gokudera kept his hand where it was. "Misunderstanding, huh?"
Hibari nodded. "It happens."
The agent would have been an awe-inspiring poker player - if he indulged in such things. But Gokudera was pretty sure he thought gambling to be below him. He never did anything he wasn't sure of. It made Gokudera grin because he knew everything was on its way back to normal.
Besides, now that Bianchi was not facing murder charges or imminent death anymore smiling came a lot easier to him. He leaned back in his seat, satisfied that this part of his plan had actually panned out well.
His smile did falter when he remembered that even the most magnificent plan had its flaws. He also didn't know how willing Hibari was to talk about it but he had to ask.
"And... Yamamoto?" He tried to sound casual but he could barely cover up the worry in his voice. Hibari only shot him a sideways glance. "He's fine."
Gokudera squirmed like a kid at the dentist's. He knew Yamamoto was not physically hurt but when it came to the rest of him Gokudera wasn't quite so sure. "That's not what I meant."
"I know." Hibari's eyes were trained on the road but his body language was that of a block of concrete. He might not have minded if Gokudera spent half the days with Yamamoto on a case but it still wasn’t Hibari’s favourite topic.
"So...," Gokudera cleared his throat, fiddling with the zipper on his uniform, "is the stupid oaf going to be in trouble for this?"
"What do you think?"
Gokudera sank lower in his seat and failed to say anything. You couldn't do right by everyone, that much he had learned the hard way. But he had hoped that just this once it wouldn't hit the nice ones.
"He gave me this." Hibari suddenly reached into the inside pocket of his jacket and produced a small piece of paper. He handed it to Gokudera who took it with a questioning frown. It was a page from an official FBI notepad and had obviously been ripped out in a hurry. There was a phone number scribbled on it, along with a note:
If you ever need a Robin again, call me.
Underneath it was a drawing of something that looked remotely like a bat if you turned it upside-down and squinted at it while holding it out of the window.
Gokudera stared at the message in disbelief, at first. And then a subtle smile crept onto his face.
"Idiot." he pocketed the paper, "Robin's sign is a bird."
---
All in all, the hearing before the internal FBI commission went better than expected. Although Gokudera was glad he didn't have to testify. He was pretty sure he wouldn't have been able to keep a straight face.
In the end, Yamamoto got off with a slightly tarnished record but Gokudera figured it was nothing he couldn't fix with a bright smile and a few lucky arrests. The commission didn't even touch Hibari. It was amusing to see Hibari's magic work on the very people who were supposed to keep him in line. It was a very wilful, subliminally violent kind of magic but it did have a miraculous effect on the committee.
Gokudera stood in front of the FBI building and snapped his cell phone shut like a mouse trap. He'd just suffered through a lengthy conversation with his sister. It had ranged from not-quite-yelling-but-you-know-that-I-could to gleefully reiterated nonsense about love and happiness. He should have just shut up about Hibari, really. But knowing Bianchi she would have probably gone and threatened it out of Shamal anyway. She was more like him than Gokudera wanted to admit.
He took a drag from his cigarette that he'd lit halfway through the phone call just to keep himself from punching a wall or doubling over due to heavy corniness overload. She even wanted to visit, God help him. Gokudera's imagination was vast when it came to horror scenarios but he couldn't for the life of him picture Hibari meeting his sister. On the other hand, it could hardly be worse than his encounter with Hibari senior. Payback was a bitch, after all.
Behind him, the big glass doors opened with the telltale sound of metal hinges that were too high up for maintenance to bother.
"So?" Gokudera asked when Hibari stepped up next to him. "What now?"
Hibari shrugged. "Nothing. Case closed."
Gokudera glanced at his partner and smiled around his half-smoked cigarette. "I doubt that."
"My father is gone." Hibari gave him a vaguely confused look. "There is nothing left to do."
Gokudera flicked the stub to the ground and squashed the smouldering remains with his heel. He squinted into the fading sunlight and grinned. "You'll keep an eye on him."
He could positively sense Hibari's raised eyebrow. "What makes you so sure of that?"
It gave Gokudera considerable pleasure to throw these words back into Hibari's face: "I know you."
He didn't wait for the agent's reply. Instead he strolled towards the car and impatiently tapped the roof. "You coming or what? I hear our coffee machine calling my name."
"It's my coffee machine," Hibari snarled but unlocked the doors anyway.
"And you're letting me use it," Gokudera said matter-of-factly. "That makes it our coffee machine."
Hibari looked at him over the roof of his car and for a moment it seemed like he was about to jump over it and strangle Gokudera. But then the tension gave way to something else and it was as close to a mischievous smirk as it ever got. "I'm only allowing you to use it because you compensate me well for it."
"You're a cruel bastard, you know that?" Gokudera scowled as he flopped down in the passenger seat.
Hibari let the engine roar up and smiled like a triumphant king returning home. "You like it."
Gokudera was fully prepared to deny this preposterous accusation when he realised that, as a matter of fact, he did. He had a house key, a night in prison and a horde of stampeding rhinos in his heart to prove it. Not to mention the fucking coffee machine.
"Maybe. A little," he mumbled, his eyes kept firmly on the scenery outside. The car made a strangely ungraceful halt at a red light and he suddenly felt Hibari's gaze on him.
"I was talking about the coffee, you arrogant prick," Gokudera snapped, despite the obvious discrepancy in conversational linearity.
Hibari eyed him like an interesting new theory and then presented him with this irritatingly knowing smirk. "Sure."
Gokudera crossed his arms and slumped back in his seat. He had never been one to admit defeat. "Fuck you."
The light turned green and the wheels of the Mercedes left black rubber marks on the concrete as Hibari put the pedal to the metal. "Give me ten minutes and I'll see to that."
To his shame Gokudera noticed for the first time that a ten minute drive home could be entirely too long.
~ END ~
Chapter 10 <-- Back to
~*~*~*~*~*~
Coming up next on *Heroes not Included:
Stay tuned for Part III. Sneaking up on you on a screen of your choice in the near future! ^_^
~*~*~*~*~*~
Part II: Abort, Retry, Fail
Fandom: Katekyo Hitman Reborn
Pairing: 1859 (established), 8059 (unrequited)
Genre: Humour, case fic, AU
Rating: PG-13 (applies to all chapters unless otherwise stated)
Word count: overall ~ 28,650 | Chapter 11: ~ 1,900
Chapters (click to jump to): 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11
Jump to Part I - No Replacements, No Refunds
Master post
~*~*~
~ Part II ~
Abort, Retry, Fail
Gokudera sat in his cell and stared at the opposite wall. There was a writing, a little to the left of the empty bunk: If only I knew what I was doing.
He'd read it countless times over the course of the last few hours and to this very moment he hadn't come up with an answer.
How this person had managed to smuggle in a sharpie was a mystery all by itself. But on second thought Gokudera really didn't want to know. From personal experience he could tell that the police were very thorough. They had stripped him of his entire gear, including his suit. Fortunately, not even the police were heartless enough to let him sit around naked. Or they didn't enjoy his bare butt as much as Hibari did. However their opinion on his physique, they had handed him a standard prisoners uniform in glaring yellow. It was the complete opposite of comfortable but still better than freezing his ass off.
He was considering leaving his own musings for future occupants of this cell when the door gave an automated click and rattled open. It revealed a police officer and a familiar dark-haired figure.
Gokudera smiled, a little relieved but not yet reassured. "I was beginning to think you wouldn't come."
Upon a nod from Hibari the policeman bustled off. The agent turned to eye Gokudera with a look that could mean anything from 'You are screwed' to 'I am your knight in a black suit. All hail me.'.
"I got your message," he said eventually, his tone as level as if he was reciting yesterday's news.
Gokudera nodded, cautious, "I was hoping you would."
Hibari tossed him a small key and pointed at the handcuffs still binding Gokudera's wrists. He didn't take his eyes off Gokudera.
"You fucked up," he stated after a while.
Gokudera stood up, holding out the handcuffs for Hibari to take. He offered a small, vaguely guilty smile along with them. "Yes. Yes, I did."
He hadn't really thought about what to expect. Gratitude? A punch in the face? With Hibari everything was possible.
The agent stood in the door, blocking Gokudera's way. He didn't look up but when he took the handcuffs he pulled Gokudera flush against him. Hibari's breath tickled his ear and before any of this could make sense there was the suggestion of lips against his skin.
Hibari didn't say thank you. But Gokudera knew the agent well enough to read not only between the lines but also from essentially blank pages. And his kisses were like ink blotches - up for interpretation.
He grinned. "So, does that mean we're good?"
Hibari silently held him close for another second or two which was an answer all by itself. Then he stepped back, assuming his official persona again. "The case is ruined. The main suspect has fled the country and important military research was set back months, if not years."
"Yeah, I figured as much." Gokudera snorted and hurried after Hibari as the agent determinedly stalked down the hall towards the exit.
"You will have to tell me exactly how you failed."
Gokudera stopped for a moment and blinked. "What for?"
Hibari threw him a glance over his shoulder. "I will have to put it in my report. I assume you tripped?"
When Gokudera didn't reply he nodded, a thin little smile on his face. "Yes. I think you tripped."
They hurried out of the police station, past rather intimidated officers and Gokudera couldn't hide his grin anymore. "Yeah, that was it. Tripped. Shame, really. Seems like I'm out of practice, after all."
Gokudera didn't miss the beginnings of a grin on Hibari's lips but they were quickly replaced by his usual business expression. Hibari led the way to his car, gesturing at Gokudera to get in.
He slid into the passenger seat and gave Hibari just enough time to get adjusted before blurting out: "What about my sister?"
Hibari seemingly ignored him and started the car.
"Hey," Gokudera grabbed the gear shifter and forced Hibari to pay him some goddamned attention, "I asked you a question, jerk."
Hibari's eyes narrowed as if he was weighing the benefits of a fight against the damage it would do to his car. Obviously, the car won. "She was released an hour ago. Turns out there was a terrible misunderstanding."
Gokudera kept his hand where it was. "Misunderstanding, huh?"
Hibari nodded. "It happens."
The agent would have been an awe-inspiring poker player - if he indulged in such things. But Gokudera was pretty sure he thought gambling to be below him. He never did anything he wasn't sure of. It made Gokudera grin because he knew everything was on its way back to normal.
Besides, now that Bianchi was not facing murder charges or imminent death anymore smiling came a lot easier to him. He leaned back in his seat, satisfied that this part of his plan had actually panned out well.
His smile did falter when he remembered that even the most magnificent plan had its flaws. He also didn't know how willing Hibari was to talk about it but he had to ask.
"And... Yamamoto?" He tried to sound casual but he could barely cover up the worry in his voice. Hibari only shot him a sideways glance. "He's fine."
Gokudera squirmed like a kid at the dentist's. He knew Yamamoto was not physically hurt but when it came to the rest of him Gokudera wasn't quite so sure. "That's not what I meant."
"I know." Hibari's eyes were trained on the road but his body language was that of a block of concrete. He might not have minded if Gokudera spent half the days with Yamamoto on a case but it still wasn’t Hibari’s favourite topic.
"So...," Gokudera cleared his throat, fiddling with the zipper on his uniform, "is the stupid oaf going to be in trouble for this?"
"What do you think?"
Gokudera sank lower in his seat and failed to say anything. You couldn't do right by everyone, that much he had learned the hard way. But he had hoped that just this once it wouldn't hit the nice ones.
"He gave me this." Hibari suddenly reached into the inside pocket of his jacket and produced a small piece of paper. He handed it to Gokudera who took it with a questioning frown. It was a page from an official FBI notepad and had obviously been ripped out in a hurry. There was a phone number scribbled on it, along with a note:
If you ever need a Robin again, call me.
Underneath it was a drawing of something that looked remotely like a bat if you turned it upside-down and squinted at it while holding it out of the window.
Gokudera stared at the message in disbelief, at first. And then a subtle smile crept onto his face.
"Idiot." he pocketed the paper, "Robin's sign is a bird."
---
All in all, the hearing before the internal FBI commission went better than expected. Although Gokudera was glad he didn't have to testify. He was pretty sure he wouldn't have been able to keep a straight face.
In the end, Yamamoto got off with a slightly tarnished record but Gokudera figured it was nothing he couldn't fix with a bright smile and a few lucky arrests. The commission didn't even touch Hibari. It was amusing to see Hibari's magic work on the very people who were supposed to keep him in line. It was a very wilful, subliminally violent kind of magic but it did have a miraculous effect on the committee.
Gokudera stood in front of the FBI building and snapped his cell phone shut like a mouse trap. He'd just suffered through a lengthy conversation with his sister. It had ranged from not-quite-yelling-but-you-know-that-I-could to gleefully reiterated nonsense about love and happiness. He should have just shut up about Hibari, really. But knowing Bianchi she would have probably gone and threatened it out of Shamal anyway. She was more like him than Gokudera wanted to admit.
He took a drag from his cigarette that he'd lit halfway through the phone call just to keep himself from punching a wall or doubling over due to heavy corniness overload. She even wanted to visit, God help him. Gokudera's imagination was vast when it came to horror scenarios but he couldn't for the life of him picture Hibari meeting his sister. On the other hand, it could hardly be worse than his encounter with Hibari senior. Payback was a bitch, after all.
Behind him, the big glass doors opened with the telltale sound of metal hinges that were too high up for maintenance to bother.
"So?" Gokudera asked when Hibari stepped up next to him. "What now?"
Hibari shrugged. "Nothing. Case closed."
Gokudera glanced at his partner and smiled around his half-smoked cigarette. "I doubt that."
"My father is gone." Hibari gave him a vaguely confused look. "There is nothing left to do."
Gokudera flicked the stub to the ground and squashed the smouldering remains with his heel. He squinted into the fading sunlight and grinned. "You'll keep an eye on him."
He could positively sense Hibari's raised eyebrow. "What makes you so sure of that?"
It gave Gokudera considerable pleasure to throw these words back into Hibari's face: "I know you."
He didn't wait for the agent's reply. Instead he strolled towards the car and impatiently tapped the roof. "You coming or what? I hear our coffee machine calling my name."
"It's my coffee machine," Hibari snarled but unlocked the doors anyway.
"And you're letting me use it," Gokudera said matter-of-factly. "That makes it our coffee machine."
Hibari looked at him over the roof of his car and for a moment it seemed like he was about to jump over it and strangle Gokudera. But then the tension gave way to something else and it was as close to a mischievous smirk as it ever got. "I'm only allowing you to use it because you compensate me well for it."
"You're a cruel bastard, you know that?" Gokudera scowled as he flopped down in the passenger seat.
Hibari let the engine roar up and smiled like a triumphant king returning home. "You like it."
Gokudera was fully prepared to deny this preposterous accusation when he realised that, as a matter of fact, he did. He had a house key, a night in prison and a horde of stampeding rhinos in his heart to prove it. Not to mention the fucking coffee machine.
"Maybe. A little," he mumbled, his eyes kept firmly on the scenery outside. The car made a strangely ungraceful halt at a red light and he suddenly felt Hibari's gaze on him.
"I was talking about the coffee, you arrogant prick," Gokudera snapped, despite the obvious discrepancy in conversational linearity.
Hibari eyed him like an interesting new theory and then presented him with this irritatingly knowing smirk. "Sure."
Gokudera crossed his arms and slumped back in his seat. He had never been one to admit defeat. "Fuck you."
The light turned green and the wheels of the Mercedes left black rubber marks on the concrete as Hibari put the pedal to the metal. "Give me ten minutes and I'll see to that."
To his shame Gokudera noticed for the first time that a ten minute drive home could be entirely too long.
~ END ~
Chapter 10 <-- Back to
~*~*~*~*~*~
Coming up next on *Heroes not Included:
- If you want something done right do it yourself.
- 69 problems but a mint ain't one.
- Not Dying for Dummies - A beginner's guide.
- Gokudera and the green-eyed monster.
- Hibari revolutionises anger management.
Stay tuned for Part III. Sneaking up on you on a screen of your choice in the near future! ^_^
~*~*~*~*~*~