so yeah. it's july. jenn comes home in less than a month. life is pretty, well, like life should be. which for some reason completely and utterly pisses me off and bores me. i guess i'm a drama whore after all. for some reason i just can't have things go right. go me. and just the simple fact that i'm BITCHING about HAVING NOTHING TO BITCH ABOUT ( Read more... )

i'm actually over it.

i think for real this time...

i don't know how i feel about this.

but i think it's good.

i feel like there's nothing i can really say to explain the way i feel about this boy. i've said all the lame cliche stuff before but this is SO much fucking different.

it's so weird that i always want to be around a person.

i like it a lot.

dont you love those leaves?
dont you wish the orange stayed forever and crickets sang in the night all through winter?

[think of all the times this jerk has fucked you up and left you down]

and hey, i choose my company by the beating of their hearts. not the swelling of their heads.

besides, i'd rather forget the days we spent then try to stay ( Read more... )

i HONESTLY do not think that i am capable of being the slightest bit fucking NOT A WHINY PIECE OF SHIT. i just want to be happy and normal and everything always be okay and calm. but i'm just a fucking sappy emotion fucking wreck that overthinks everything. i just want to forget. who the fuck CARES about what if? there really isn't a what if in ( Read more... )

maybe i'm just cranky and need to go to bed. i've been in a good mood for weeks except for today.

it's so weird how i can go years without thinking twice about something, but then regret it so fucking much now. and it's just like, the two things that i wanted more than anything in the world, that i had a choice to persue both of them, and i just chose neither. i mean i thought things would just happen. i don't know. i shouldn't be writing about ( Read more... )

i don't care.

I haven't really updated in a very long time, save a few very frustrated/angry few sentences. I don't really have too much to update on. The past few weeks have been alright. I'm actually pretty content with the way things are; nothing is 'at stake' so to speak. I like it that way. In a way, I really can't wait to go back to work, but then I think ( Read more... )

not really a lot of updates lately, but if you care to know anything, you can just ask me. that's it, really.