it still stings sometimes when i think about him. im really hoping that silence will make that completely go away..

you are reading the journal of a future student of the art institute of austin, my classes start on aug. 21 and in about three years ill be graduating from the interior design course with a bachelors in science. ive never been more excited, my life is taking off and im so close i can taste my dream job. as for now im going to enjoy my day on the ( Read more... )

why cant i just know what i want in life and go for it already? i hate being this confused all the time.

ive been really confused about what i want lately. im seriously considering quiting my job, or giving up my manager position. i dont know if us never talking again is the best thing, or if i want to talk to you some day in the future. it will always boil down to the fact that i still love you, but you've let go of those feelings along with your ( Read more... )

it seems that when i thought i couldnt get any closer to the bottom of the barrel the good karma that ive been spreading forever decided to pay me back a favor. yesterday i got the most adorable kitten, to me he'll be named jerome, he sleeps on your pillow now, to everyone else he'll be known as kitty. i got free cable and a new friend that i ( Read more... )

 i just want my heart to stop hurting, im convinced that you no longer have feelings for me what so ever. im super sick from what im guessing is stress i just want to curl up and dissapear for a while. fuck

even  though i have so much in the end i feel like im left with nothing. im still as madly in love with you as i was 3 months ago. i want to not feel this way anymore, i want to feel not so alone, i feel like ive moved to a different state, my old best friends have become meir aquantinces. im scared and no one can seem to ease my mind.

opening in the morning, before it starts getting light reminds me of the early part of our relationship when i used to close and rush just to see you, or when my car broke down and you would always be outside waiting with a smile to take me home. its a funny feeling to look at where you were and what you've become. your the one insident in my life ( Read more... )

 i moved out on my own finally, but this past week ive just been depressed and scared. i have so many emotions scrambled up in my head i cant even pick one to feel. i cant help but think this was a mistake i cant take back. i wish you were here though, i was never scared when i was with you, you always had the answer for everything.

( Read more... )