I used to walk a lot, I guess. and I can see what I had been reading. What do I read now? Is it between the lines of this narrative ( Read more... )

Seeing Kevin and Micheal; surprising moments of stimulation; no TV, no games, just talking. We are serious, drinking. Xena. How much Summer Hours; French movie I've watched about a matriarch dying; about life and all its secrets; I feel like my whole life is secrets, like I am hiding from everyone around me, some tiny part. I don't know of anyone ( Read more... )

Contemplating the end of the semester and what feels like so many little things to wrap up; in reality I know that it's not as over-whelming as it seems. Just two jobs and two classes and a thesis. I find myself making lists and forgetting them. Still talking with Carmel, possibly moving away from her? Again, I see all the games and drama and she ( Read more... )

So much time with Carmel. Not entirely sure what that means or how. Finding in her the small womanly inclination to games and drama. Her intelligence, creativity, hard-work are all things I admire. Coming to be attracted to her physically as well. What is difficult to overcome is the roller-coaster ride of here and gone again; poly, available, ( Read more... )

What is to find in it ( Read more... )

More literal than figurative, unfortunately. I spend a lot of time lately wondering where my edges are. Like, coming to a place where I need to realize there's not always exponential growth--that sometime, sooner or later, you potential catches up with you. And me, I've been doing nothing with mine... which makes me wonder if it's shrinking, ( Read more... )

That's just what happens when you spend too much time alone s'allll good. Some drinks, That awkward moment when you reveal too much in too little words. Obtuse? Pray it's laughter with you, not at you. Let go of all that anxiety.

Some people blossom at the first sign of light ( Read more... )

Queen Elizabeth. How historians talk of her spinsterdom. Why would she want to be a virgin queen? Is it any wonder? With a father who murdered women, cursing the womb he so fervently desired, discarding the daughters like rotting chum; the woman with all of England at her fingers, why would she ever want a King?

Today was a long and astonishing day; talking to an old man, sick with worry, depression, anxiety. Really not knowing how to take that moment in my hands at all, trying to build something out of it, failing. REalizing the value of a listening ear, my own uselessness at the task ( Read more... )