Robert's face is so interesting and awesome. I was thinking about it today, and I'm pretty sure that it's the best thing ever. So mysterious, but so uplifting. Who knows what horrors those puppy dog eyes have seen in their lifetime? What joyful smell that nose has smelled. How many drugs has that unique mouth smoked? Some questions are meant ( Read more... )

My hindsight is 20/40.

Austin police must have some kind of fetish for disbanding pick up soccer games.
They wanted us to pay. I pay taxes. So now I have to pay for something I don't use, then pay again to use it? Clarence, what the eff?
Fourth of July my foot. I'm going to go rioting.

Dear Government,
Please change.

I hate all of you except the Coast Guard,-Mikey

While snowboarding over spring break, my cousins brought some friends from college. They were crazy. I was supposed to sleep with my cousin on the couch, and times would be good, but then one of his friends got inbetween us and said he was going to sleep there. I thought he was kidding, but he wasn't. "Don't be gay, okay?" he said right before ( Read more... )

( new year )

It's hard to come up with new year resolutions when you're already perfect.

"Go home and open your presents. I hope you get a new pillow to cry into."

Me: Hey, how's it going?
Becca: Good.

Hahaha, you had to have been there.

Bikes + Ice = Bad times.

good news: i went to a wedding ( Read more... )