and i did. he didnt understand, but i explained it to him. its not like i havent been dropping hints. i told him just last week that i wasnt sure about marriage and that i didnt want him to bring it up again. he said okay but he still continued to talk about it. every hour he would ask me when i was going to be ready and when we were going to get ( Read more... )

last night jamie and i went up town and we had a great time. we laughed and talked and had fun just being with one another. but... he kept asking me when we were going to get married and i dont want to do that. i love him and all but i dont want to spend the rest of my life with him. if thats wrong, im sorry. but i dont. i dont feel like he is the ( Read more... )

she just wanted to be picked up. she is in here with me. she is so cute. i love her so much. jamie is about to be here. i want to go somewhere tonight. oh yeah. i am going walking again tonight. well we can do that and maybe see what movies are playing. well we dont have the money. she is going to the babysitter monday and he has to give me money ( Read more... )

i dont know why but my stomach hurts bad...well it has slacked off. but it was cramping really bad. either i have to use the bathroom or i am having period cramps and i dont recognize them cause i havent had a period in so long. anyway.. that was gross i know. today was a good day. lilly is staying up more during the day which is good cause i can ( Read more... )

i am getting it at the base of my neck. my mom told me if i do that that i cant go into the military but i told her that i dont want to leave lilly so i am not going in. i was thinking about it but i dont want to be away from lilly for that long. i dont think i could handle it. yeah... but lilly is good. i set her up her 1 month app. with the doc. ( Read more... )

k. my comuter started acting funny. its doing it again but i am hoping it wont go out on me. but anyway... my mom is taking me to get a couple of shirts and a pair of jeans since i cant fit into my old ones and i dont look right in maternity jeans anymore. i want to fit into my old jeans so badly but it hasnt even been 3 weeks so... i cant lose 70 ( Read more... )

i feel so fat. i have eaten 2 times today and i had a snack. i cant stand being huge. i want to lose this preggy weight and i am losing, but not like i want to. i want to not eat anything but i cant help it. i get so hungry. i am using my ab lounger and i am walking. i walked a mile last night and i am going again tonight so i am exercising every ( Read more... )

k. lillys cord fell off yesterday. i saved it. jamie thought it was gross but i put it in a baggie and saved it. it is in my keepsake box. i wrote down the date and all. i gotta go.gotta make her a bottle. -Ash

lilly is so adorable.i love her so much. she is nearly 10 pounds!!! or she might already be that big. she was 9 lbs 12 ounces a week ago. i do though. i love her so much. she means everything to me. i am doing fine. i am still trying to get all this weight off and i am not doing good right now. i got my appetite back and now i am eating like 2wice ( Read more... )

sorry. i just dont want my computer to cut off on me... like always..but yeah. i am just so sleepy... i hope i can get some sleep tonight. i think lilly is sick. i hope not... ill call the doc on monday and ask about her symptoms... but i feel so healthy. i am taking these green tea diet pills. and i am walking and only eating once, twice a day at ( Read more... )