... Crap of all things. my love of a computer died in the friggin night. I turned it off cause there was a storm and it refused to wake up this morning. so I' am pissed. i want a friggin mac now. Grrr.... any ways it was old... But now I'm usin my moms. haha i guess its for the best though. I want to upload some CD's to my iPod but no... my mums ( Read more... )

Right now I feel that I dont have an ED. So I dont. I'm not underweight I eat. I dont want to lable my self something I'm not. So I'm not going onto the forums or such like that. I am going on a diet now. My diet ( Read more... )

Not feeling so good... I binged yesterday. and Were going over to my depressed Step grandmas to help her with some stuff liek sorting out our inheritance for instance. I hope I get my camera out of all this... and some of my grandmas stuff she wanted me to have....

<3 Apy

CW: 151. Grr..

As sweat pours down my body

and cool water down my throat.

I sit here and wonder my intentions.

To my right it tells me one thing.

To my left anouther.

So many desions

So many choices.

As I waste away to nothingness.

As I feel the burning rage.

Why cant I stop?

Why cant I listen?

Whos right?

whos wrong?

Will I find out?

Cant you tell me?

Am I being ( Read more... )

i quit trying to eat normally its to hard. Gah...

Thats all...

<3 Apy

Ok. Heres the scoop. i'm going to try not to rely on my ED to loose weight so i'm going to try to start eating normally. But food its bothering my stomach so I dun know... I'm at least trying. i know that my ED will probably come back 10 times worse than it was.  I'm aware of this but my friend is trying to help me wuith this I'm so thankful to ( Read more... )

went great. Now i'm eating green beans and potatos cause I made an excuse that I ate a late lunch so my mom wanted me to have dinner still but later. So I'm having teh side. haha I love green beans. They are yummy. not so big of a potato fan any more though... more for sweet potatos.

<3 Apy ( Read more... )

I told my friend flo about my problem with teh throwing up she said it may be because I'm eating to much. So I'm gunna go on a fast .. I dun know how long fast but at least a 24 hour one for now.  Cause my mom will be home on friday cause its her 50th birthday so we're getting ready for teh party. So the fast starts.... in one minute. thats 10:30 ( Read more... )

I just dont get it! Ok i binged again this morning. I didnt eat every thing though... Like I only ate 5 bites of the turkey leg... Then fed alot of it to my dog... But any ways... I took a shower what I dont get is that I keep throwing up for no reason... I swear I'm not trying to but it keeps happening! One part of me says "Good job you got rid of ( Read more... )

I got my new CD's I was waiting for ( Read more... )