In between battling feelings of being an inadequate mother & wife there are also times where I just let everything coast along like setting my life on cruise control. Maybe I feel better right now because I have 2 days off from work in a row & after several weeks off my meds I started taking them again because I could feel the anxiety creeping back ( Read more... )

Fatigue came back hardcore on Friday. I could barely keep my eyes open all day at work. I fall asleep so early now. God I hate it there at the deli. I feel like a ghost, no one notices when I'm there, no one notices if I take half hour breaks which is good. No one will talk to me with the exception of one or two people. I feel like I'm in high ( Read more... )

Tired today. I could be low on iron. Get me a bag of spinach! Being pregnant hasn't really changed me as a person. I'm still a geek, still drive my dopey car I call a quirk-mobile because it's very quirky, still act the same pretty much. I have so much laundry to put away later mine & Phil's. We've gone from the childhood game of playing house to ( Read more... )

I wish I lived in a state that has better options for car insurance. That accident 2 years back really screwed things up. I'm not paying that much this year, only $125 a month starting from October to next May & I have no car payments, I own my car outright so. It'll be another 4 years until it's off my record. I just hope I can keep up my incident ( Read more... )

It's a weird sensation, I always feel like there's popcorn constantly popping in my stomach especially after I eat & when I'm lying perfectly still that's when she likes to move a lot. At least I know she's okay ( Read more... )

It must be those hormones but I feel all shifted out of shape now, since this afternoon. This has been a pretty overwhelming year, compared to last year I don't know which is worse. I have so many things to do & such a small window of time to complete them. Breaking down & crying happens all too frequently & while it solves nothing, it helps to ( Read more... )

My car's brakes are done but I have to go back tomorrow morning to have a part installed to make air come out of the vents in the dashboard because nothing happens when I turn them on so that's probably another $2-$300 on that piece of shit car of mine. No more used cars, the next car I buy won't have any miles except the ones I put on & it WON'T ( Read more... )

I'm starting to wish I did more with my life. I only feel like this after I read my short little friends page & see all their accomplishments. Gee, I wish someone would find me here & wish me well. I want to go back to school but I think I'm going to have to wait. I want to go to NE Tech & learn automotive technology. Sweet. On the way back from ( Read more... )

I've never had a reason to write more than I do now. I cannot believe this is happening to me. It happens to a lot of people though, I'm certainly not the only one. Every hadicapped person out there had a mother who recieved news like this. It's still just very tough. Just when I was getting over the initial shock of being pregnant I get hit with ( Read more... )

I was going to write about a few good things that happened this month but now I don't feel like it. I'm so Goddamn tired. Today was an okay day until I got here. Things were said, bad things by me & I don't even know where it all came from. Lack of sleep I guess. I'm heading home soon, I really need to be alone. I don't think I can do this. I feel ( Read more... )