So Nancy Cartwright, the voice of Bart Simpson and others... was employed as the voice of Gusty the My Little Pony in the 80's. I'm sitting there watching The End of Flutter Valley and I just keep expecting to hear Gusty bust out with a, "Eat my shorts!" or "Don't have a cow!" or maybe Homer to pop out from behind a tree somewhere. I love spotting ( Read more... )

So Tim bought this "magic eight ball" style Yoda today. It's pretty sweet. You turn him on and he goes, "Sense the force in my left hand..." I gotta remember that one the next time I'm at the bar and want to pick up some guy. Anyway, so he tells you to sense his forceful handliness and then you're supposed to ask him questions and squeeze his hand ( Read more... )

I'm a relatively easy-going person. I'm willing to forgive and forget a lot of stupid shit. For instance, I forgot all about the dickhead who pinned me up against a wall and forced me to make out with him, then whipped out Mr. Happy to dry-hump me (believe me, I wish I was making that up ( Read more... )

Okay, here's the plan: Tell me a really bad joke.

Doesn't "Chiggles" sound like it should be some kind of a vaguely embarrassing disease or particularly nasty insult or something?


( Read more... )

OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG!

Where has this been all my life? The Pearls Before Swine feed... Why didn't I look for it sooner? WHY, God, WHY?!

Bartender weirdness the other night. We discussed the exchanging of numbers. It did not occur yet, though. Instead, he obtained my full name and is, apparently, going to "check me out". Why does this seem kinda weird? Oh, right. BECAUSE IT IS. Why does all the weird stuff happen to me?

Edit: Wait, wait. I forgot my favourite part ( Read more... )

Whoa! Sweet! A couple hours ago, everything in our house started vibrating. So my first thought was, naturally, "Aliens! It's the aliens!"

Of course, it wasn't the aliens. Instead, it was a 4.5 magnitude earthquake. I can honestly say I've never actually felt an earthquake before. Neat!

From the "Things That Would've Been Really Funny Had They Actually Worked Out Properly" file :

My sister tried to send me a picture of a dead bug a couple weeks ago and it never arrived.

From the "Inquiring Minds Really Wanna Know" file :

If I didn't get the picture of the dead bug... Who did?

( Maybe you're like me. )