so... updates on my life ( Read more... )

goodbye you. despite what you may have  thought, i believed much moreof you than anyone else did, even[and maybe especially yourself]. i did care, i did miss you, and i will miss you. i did love you, and you did matter. you mattered to me. i hope you've shaken you're sadness now. i hope that if there is an afterlife, youvew found your peace,and if ( Read more... )

Ok. I'm going to do my best to feel productive today. My list of things to do is as follows.
1. Clean my  car out
2. Wash my car.
3. Clean Dani's hat. lol
4. Clean my whole room
5. Find some way to secure money for myself. Perhaps as acting as a taxi service...?

And that, people, is terribly sad. That is my To-Do List for today.

i fucked up one too many times
but this time i fucked up my whole life
but it's been coming for a while
and i've been hiding in denial
now it's over and there's nothing left for me to do but go

i. am. so. terrified.
i'm terrified, and i feel like the circle of people who used to stand around me has gotten so much smaller. i feel like i'm positive that's ( Read more... )

1. it was nice to see you. good to be able to talk to you and just exist in the present and not worry about the past. amazing to realize and to learn that after all that hapened between us and all that happened around us, you are still just my best friend from sophomore year. priceless that you are still my friend.i wish that we could do this more ( Read more... )

i'm so tired. please just stop hurting me, because i can't take this push-me-away-and-pull-me-back game anymore. you and i both know you always win.

i am so tired of having to spillmyself out over and over again. hello,my name is doormat.I live toplease others at the price of my sanity. i need a rest.

just when i think that no more shit can possibly hit the fan, it keeps coming. I keep losing friend after friend and I can't bring myself to care. Anyone who has allowed themselves to be wrapped up in all of this nonsensical bullshit has lost my respect.  That takes alot. You can hurt me, you can lie to me, you can use me and leave me bleeding ( Read more... )

Just heard the news today, let yourself down once again ( Read more... )

i just saw Party Monster. God. What a completely distressing, amazing movie lol. I was unable to form sentences for about 10 minutes after it ended. If you've ever seen it, it probably makes more sense, but that movie is essentially the epitome of my greatest fear ( Read more... )