splitting
seeing someone as good and bad
but at different times
like they are not a single person

object constancy-er something like that
being able to understand that when someone or something 
is out of sight, it still exist
Lacking this causes sever anxiety and abandonment issues

splitting - o. c. = depression

fun times
fun fucking times

a memory holds onto things
like the old cliches of file cabinets
but what if you learned it differently?
and i don't mean the in one ear out the other cliche either

if u know you don't know but somehow you have to really know
how do you access it 
and how can you understand who u r
and what you do
why is always the question
you know that
but if that's all ( Read more... )

 
the minds a bitch
i'm walking on this path, and i decide i should sit down and take a break
by the time i get up and get moving, i've forgotten how i got there
no matter which direction i choose
it all looks new
classic hansel and that one bitch
except there's no cottage and there isn't a witch
(and damnit there's no ginger bread or applesauce)
just me ( Read more... )

 I feel like im in a staring contest with myself.  And day by day I lose.

1. For $1,000 would you wear your underwear on the outside of your pants to go grocery shopping? Yes2. For $100 would you eat edible insects? No3. For $500 would you have a harry met sally moment and fake an orgasm in public? No4. For $50 would you start singing out loud in a public library? No5. For $100,000 would you sleep with a complete ( Read more... )

According to experts, my personality type is :
World Leader
( Read more... )

 I found this rabbit

In overhearing what I shouldn't have heard
I got two things, maybe three to purge

One

You are.  Only and souly. Alone.

Two

I have nothing but something I ate for you.

Three

Not quite a hop or jump or skip, but still
Away

5:15 AM
Leave indy @ 5:50 am
lost till 7:20 am
get to first class 30 min late
get to second 10 min late (after trying to pring poem- that I didn't have-- so I e-mailed everyone that i sent it to in order to hopefully get it back-)
Late to 3rd class by 15-20 min- b/c i was waiting to see if I got an e-mail with my poem in it (which i would have gotten ( Read more... )

Help Anorexia

"Get regular, stay regular"  -sleep, food, life

Live by self

Eat better

Write n' read

I'm tired

well, today was fun

I got to bless people
Meditate
dance, sing, and play drums
Play in the snow
Eat an egg roll
and celebrate the first day of winter with Ariel, Sara (his), and Nick (red head w/cat)
Life is good here
...
But I still miss home
and I still miss my baby

To my G. bear:   *hugs*