I'm doing this. I have to. I need to. I want to more than anything.

I'm am so full of fear and anxiety. I'm so impatient. I want so badly for this feeling to go away. It's fucking up my plan ( Read more... )

it hurts so bad. I hate it. It fucking hurts. please. make it stop.

I need an intimate moment right now ( Read more... )

I've always been this stunted, injured being. I've always felt broken. I've always needed saving. Fixing. I may always be this way. I don't know. After 22 years nothing has changed. I've grown accustomed to life this way. I don't like it but I'm not exactly sure how to go about the change I so desperately desire. Maybe I love it, deep down. Maybe I ( Read more... )

I've made the life changing decision to join the navy. I'm unshakably thrilled and determined. I foresee incredible life altering happenings soon to come. I have been thinking about what it will be like and what I'll doing the navy. The places I'll go. The things I'll see. Will I make a career out of this? Will I put in my twenty and retire at 42? ( Read more... )

I joined the navy. I can't leave for boot camp until I lose 9 more pounds. I'm so annoyed.
Wish my chubby ass luck!

I'm at a crossroads right now. What to do? I want to move into this apartment in Ahwatukee. I don't make enough money to start saving. I will have to crash the couch for a month. Gay. But it would be so nice to live in a nice apartment and work in a nice part of town and maybe things will be pretty. I want so badly to live in a nice place and feel ( Read more... )

How do we know when it's over or when it's time to grow up and find ourselves. I have been struggling with this for so long. There is this huge part of me that has hope. That refuses to let go. That knows. That knows that this one was real. that this one could be it. I still cry because a part of me is gone. I don't look because deep down I know I ( Read more... )

So I am so stressed out. I am so over this shit. Sarah is flipping out. surprise surprise. Where am I supposed to come up with 250 dollars. I can't deal with this shit. I have anxiety. it's overwhelming. I need to relax and focus on myself and what I'm doing. I'm going to enroll and mcc or cgcc as soon as possible. That will make me feel better. I ( Read more... )