Good bye LJ
it was fun while it lasted
I will return one day.  Many days later.  Maybe I will return, maybe not.  Maybe I will find this one day when I am old and gray.

these days have been hard.  Ive come to the self realization that SJE was not good for me.  Im feeling pain but its different this time.  Its a withdrawal pain.  I guess its just because Ive become so used to being close to some one, some one to come home to, some one who I could be comfortable with.  I told her I loved her and I meant it.  But now ( Read more... )

I hate that every time I think about writing in this thing it seems like such a great idea.  Im walking some where and thinking and feeling that I want to write but for some reason I log on here and decide for some reason that I dont want to do it any more.  Its werid.  Its like seeing an old girlfriend and Im instantly interested and then I talk ( Read more... )

Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck ( Read more... )

Im doing a bit better now.  Been focusing on getting all this stuff together for applying to Grad school.  I think its going to look pretty good, but the profs have got to like it too, more then the 20 other students applying.  I cant call it right now.  So much is riding on this, this could potentially effect the rest of my life.  It will, theres ( Read more... )

I am currently a product of what I have been doing to myself for the past 2 years now. I hate it, I hate me right now. I am trying to not remain cynical right now. I dont hate every one or hate this world. Im trying my hardest to become who I need to be. I love Jimmy Johns, weird random fact but it has relevance here. They have some cool ( Read more... )

It really does. Life is so complex the older you get it just begins to suck at some point. This is the first time I have been back stabbed. When you give a man your word then you stick to it. You dont go and immediately do what you said you promised. Red bras and gunfire and Johhny Noxville... never gets old.

I have to say that I haven't updated in quite some time. At times I hate this thing, others I love it. Its interesting how I find myself yearning to write and when I finally get here infront of this blank screen it all escapes me. I miss writing. I miss recording my life. While this place has seemed to become desolate of posters and other ( Read more... )

Im going to try to write more

They have gotten a lot more dramatic so it would seem. Seems I feel that I am not the wiser right now which feels weird... then again its 3:35am and I am at my apartment window bumming a little internet. I have .85 in my bank account and could use a gallon of gas, a pack of cigerrets, and a 6 pack of PBR. That would be nice right about now... too ( Read more... )