Well....guess what? And no i haven't been offered the role of Arnie in "What's eating Gilbert Grape 2".....I smashed my Ford into little pieces, was thrown through the front windshield, landed on an old woman driving a gopher who flipped out and drove us both off a bridge. Luckily i was wearing my GoGo Gadget rocket boots, so i was able to propel ( Read more... )

I need relief. In my brain. A lot of you probably don't think too much happens inside my rather large skull, but shit happens ok, and lots of it. I need clarity. If i can think of nothing and bypass my ego, you know that stupid barrier that lies between the sub-conscious and conscious and totally fucks up normal impulses and instincts and tarnishes ( Read more... )

Daa daa dadada daaa da dadada daaa da dadada dum. Why are you not kneeling scum, don't you know who i am? Sure it might have been a while, my face may have changed, my shoes may not smell quite so sour, but it's still meeeee. The inimitable, the despicable, the expendable but always dependable......Michael C Cadby.
Quiet down now, yes, i know its ( Read more... )

Ring ring, ring ring ( Read more... )

I think i worked out what garreth liddiard sounds like. A DINGO. A dingo wailing, coz his pups have been slaughtered by some drunk , i don't know, what's a safe word to call them, ummm... ! Natives. I feel like the word aborigine is just somehow taboo and racist to be written. Or maybe it's the fact the aborigines are killing dingoes for slippers ( Read more... )

Boom Chicka Boom Chicka Chicka Boom Boom Chicka Boom Chicka Chicka Boom Boom ( Read more... )

tHIS WOMAN TODAY....HANG ON JUST BANGED CAPS LOCK, THERE, NO WAIT, there we go. This woman, actually she was kind of old so let's call her Dinosaur. So Dinosaur was walking towards me along a path in Mt Claremont, and while we're talking about there being a mountain in Claremont i may as well state that if it is a mountain then Mike lives at the ( Read more... )

Slow drone, slow drone your moving to fast ( Read more... )

There used to live an old man next door to my family when we lived in Melbourne. He always had cherry ripes on him every single time i went over. I think he was a subscriber or something. Sometimes when you rang the door bell, he wouldn't come to the door. I knew when this happened he'd be in the shadows of his sitting room, hooked up to his ( Read more... )

I hated the sight of you
i wanted to rape you and then
murder you
afterwards
two weeks ago
i
thought
seriously of
smashing your head in with
a
cobblestone

If you really
want
to know
i
thought you had something
to do with
the
thoughtpolice