going to have to do things i dont want to do but they are for the better... it is good that i am recognizing things as being toxic vs being healthy but i hate feeling like i'm pulling out my own teeth just to get somewhere ( Read more... )

i want to write what are the words can i not write when i don't feel? but this quiet cavern in the backwoods of my mind is so so so comfortable i don't want to wake from this smooth gold green dream with the edges blurred slow and only holy ghosts and dogwood trees. it is safe here silent with a warm breeze and the gentle leaves. they call and they ( Read more... )

i'm too lazy to properly update this but shit's good and i'm good
i just wish i was writing more hmmmmm

i wanna go shopping BAD

alive. soft. clean. warm. cool. alive. alive. alive. breathe in breathe out just go my eyes are closed but my mind is open

moving to bushwick with lila suuuuup got the ill spotttttttttt having a backyard growing sunflowers and potatoes straight chillin!@!!!!

randomly went home for the weekend.. drank whiskey and nips on the fung wah with becca, then drank all weekend. did the single ladies dance (hemineh eheheheheh) and went on lots of adventures. walked home from joey's in allston to mark's at grove st in belmont at dawn and saw a pretty sunrise. got a fun drunk piggyback most of the way too. spent ( Read more... )

i was right. however... i am not the wreck i thought i would be. i cried a bit at first yesterday but haven't since. lila was the best ever and sheltered me at her work/fed me chocolate goodies ++ cofffee and then we drank wine and i slept @ her house. female support group rocks. becca's coming in tonight, mallory and deirdre i think next weekend, ( Read more... )

i'm tired, my liver hurts, work and boston tomorrow!

i have questions that no one can help me with......

working working working, traveling, drifting, stumbling... new places new faces sometimes unsafe or unusual  but still needing and seeking the newness.. late nights, my fire escape, backyards and bushwick, breaking bottles out the window and chasing rats with bass guitars, wine, falling asleep to records blasting, pushed and pulled, ups and downs ( Read more... )