You DO have a personality. It's buried under the depression and loneliness.
You don't want to hear this, but it's true: You are not the only one who has ever felt this way, and it WILL get better.
Try not to lose sight of who you are, and if you already have, then you need to get it in gear, my friend.
You ARE a person, you ARE interesting, you ARE loved, but you won't accept this for some reason. You need to look at the whole picture, and you need to find out what is broken so you can fix it.
Just because one important person in your life doesn't seem to find you interesting or lovable doesn't mean you should give up on the rest of the people in your life, and it especially doesn't mean you should give up on yourself.
It is NOT too late to change the direction your life is going. When you look back years from now you will realize that these years are just another blip on the radar screen of life, just like highschool was. It has to get better. It WILL get better.
Ben Bradley...this has been the story of my life too. I have never really fit in, never had real friends...I always wondered what was wrong with my personality that no one would want to be around me. but believe me, that perfect group of friends WILL come. It has for me. And I know we aren't the best of friends, but I know you well enough to kknow that you do not have a major personality flaw. It is never too late to start over. Your'e like...19 years old. You have your whole life ahead of you. You will find your place eventually. Oh, and one more peice of advice, lay off the pot for a bit. I find whenever I feel alone and smoke all I do is overanalyze and exaggerate every character flaw I have.
you don't lack personality, you effin' poo face. stop being so hard on yourself. step outside. and take a deep deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep breath. and realize that this life. the one right here. right now. is all we have. it's everything. EVERYTHING. When it's over, that's it. You only have one chance to live it the way you want to. The way you you you want to. One chance to smile and mean it every sinlge possible chance you get. And in this ONE chance at life, you have a million chances to start over and get things right. live YOUR LIFE. BEN. stop hiding behind your insecurities. you really have no reason to have those insecurities anyway. you have friends that love you. so love yourself.
Now, take a deep breath and let yourself go. now. go.
Yes...I just got home from work at Vino's...and I have to get up at like 5:00 AM to go with Kayleigh's dad to Alma and do some stagehand work or something...I'm definitely not excited about waking up early, but tomorrow should be interesting.
If you aren't busy tomorrow (Saturday) night you should come up to Conway and meet mah collegiate friends. That is if we get back from Alma at a reasonable time.
Comments 13
You don't want to hear this, but it's true: You are not the only one who has ever felt this way, and it WILL get better.
Try not to lose sight of who you are, and if you already have, then you need to get it in gear, my friend.
You ARE a person, you ARE interesting, you ARE loved, but you won't accept this for some reason. You need to look at the whole picture, and you need to find out what is broken so you can fix it.
Just because one important person in your life doesn't seem to find you interesting or lovable doesn't mean you should give up on the rest of the people in your life, and it especially doesn't mean you should give up on yourself.
It is NOT too late to change the direction your life is going. When you look back years from now you will realize that these years are just another blip on the radar screen of life, just like highschool was. It has to get better. It WILL get better.
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Now, take a deep breath and let yourself go. now. go.
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Love robot, robot.
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Molly I miss you like the moon misses the sun.
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If you aren't busy tomorrow (Saturday) night you should come up to Conway and meet mah collegiate friends. That is if we get back from Alma at a reasonable time.
Word.
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do you have to work tonight too?
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Gah!! How could I let myself miss another Western party for that silly ole thing we call money?
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