im thinking too much, so much, so i think i should write some of it down. i wrote something on allys journal the other day. something about wishing life would give me a roadside so i could find where "home" is. well. it did, i was just trying so hard to control everything that i didnt want to see it. It started a few nights ago. I drank too ( Read more... )

on the way to the airport today i got picked up by a limosine. well, not a limo so much as one of those fnacy new towncars. it was raining, I hadnt yet invested in an umbrella, and he must have felt sorry for me. he drove me to the airport, then went back to his clients at the private jet area. the day only got stranger. i told him i was a ( Read more... )

two years ago there was this trend of posting lists of 100 things about yourself. i decided to do it again and see the differences ( Read more... )

the weather is perfect today. sunny, warm, slightly breezy. and then tonight....rain. warm, spring-smelly rain. with plenty of liughtning and thunder. i cant tel you how much BETTER this weather makes me feel inside. its amazing really. me and bob are good. he bought me a beautiful diamond ring. three princess cut stones. past, present, ( Read more... )

I had a dream last night. that i got another tattoo. it was of a flower, on my back, an iris to be exact. and it made me angry in the dream, because i couldnt understand why i got such a meaningless stupid little flower on my back. i woke up this morning to the radio, thinking about it some more. then a song came on and i sat straight up to ( Read more... )

im sitting here tonight, dreading going back into work tomorrow. and im asking myself... what the hell am i doing? i suck at selling things. im just not good at it. why? because i dont like selling things. if i did, id be selling something with a higher pricepoint, like a mercedes. so why am i basing my entire career on sales? because im ( Read more... )

http://server4.ihostphotos.com/show.php?id=16650

My First Cover.....God I want this bad.....

i miss home. i miss the hudson valley, i miss rolling hills and route 9 traffic and k104 and naohs wings. i really do. i miss feeling like im at home. i miss pj, and ally, and laura, and my sister and my parents and my nanny. i dont miss my job, but i miss my old coworkers. i miss familiarity. i miss eighties night. i miss the chance and ( Read more... )

the scary part is, i copied this out of a 15 year olds myspace profile...and her answers were worse than mine..well...almost ( Read more... )

It's funny, as soon as your life starts to settle down, its almost as if the dust clears, and all of a sudden you start to see all of the aspects of your life so much clearer. As soon as I took this job, working downtown as a makeup artist, I had to come to terms with quite a few realities. First, I wasnt a flight attendant any more. with that, ( Read more... )