Today Ryan's parents, sister, brother-in-law and I attended Ryan's graduation ( Read more... )

Ryan was supposed to come home yesterday to me, his family, his friends, my arms and our life ( Read more... )

It's been six months since Ryan's leave to Las Vegas.

It's been six months since I felt the heat of his skin.
since I held his hand
since I looked in his eyes and saw our future
It's been six months since I felt complete.

I'll never feel whole again.

July 10.
ATK.

On July 10, 2005 at approximately 2:30 P.M. my boyfriend, the man I was supposed to marry and spend my life with, Lance Corporal Ryan Joseph Kovacicek was killed in combat fire in Iraq.

This will be my final entry.

his voice flooded into my ear as a familiar wave of sound, and i am at peace again. peace is overrated, and so is freedom. sometimes i am amazed at the heart's capacity to withstand unimaginable pain. i am amazed how love shines true from the other side of the planet, from a spot in the west desert, filled with hate, and my hero. i am amazed, ( Read more... )

a rap by arielle. and a parody by amy and naomi ( Read more... )

i will be in israel tomorrow.

i miss him so incredibly much ( Read more... )

in a nutshell ( Read more... )

froma girl who found it somewhere else etc etc.

I am a military girlfriend.
I hold no formal recognition with the powers that be. I am at the bottom of the chain. I hold no Military ID card. I am not a dependent or a parent.
The man I love may face unspeakable dangers, and I am at the mercy of those who possess this recognition for news.
I ( Read more... )