HE'S COMING SATURDAY. AHHHHHHH ( Read more... )

so  a lot has happened ( Read more... )

i suck at following through ( Read more... )

i hate the mirror sometimes ( Read more... )

Interesting weekend ( Read more... )

i dont know why this bothered me so much.

but i feel  .... i dont know what i feel.
i guess i feel the same as i always fucking feel which is simply dissatisfied.

discontent. disenchanted. disoriented.

i've met two guys this month.
two guys who seemed to have great potential.
the first fizzled and died in the first few weeks.
he was nice. too nice maybe ( Read more... )

alright ( Read more... )

i hate how music can articulate things better than i can.
something keeps bringing me back to you.

sigh.

tonight was great.
but. there is always the 'but' with him.

i went over. kevin and riley were there, a great focal point of distraction from anything substantial. so we got to hang out on surface level for once, which doesnt happen often. it was nice ( Read more... )

a lot of soul searching since that last entry has led me to a conclusion:

i havent fucking changed.

i clutter my mask with all the different images i want to see in the mirror, that i want people to see, but when it comes down to it, one on one, face to face, i'm no different than i was before i started this quest for self improvement.
i want to be a ( Read more... )

i've never been more disgusted with the people i claim to care about ( Read more... )